• Next mountain to climb for sexual satisfaction

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    NWTVFiona [sign in to see picture]
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    I was looking back through my toy collection the other week and it started me thinking.... looking at some of the early sex toys both my wife and I have compared to the ones we now have and crave.

    Some do not have the same effect on us anymore or we get bored on them quickly as there are now bigger, faster toys we have that satisfy us for longer and with more intense sensations.

    The same goes for what satisfies us with our sexual fantasies and habbits. Having progressed to the fetish scene and bondage etc the things we use to do to get us aroused and turned on are now so tame and timid that they would be considered non starters. We are both happy with where we are in our experiences and are always looking for new exciting things to try but I did wonder if its like this with others... pushing the boundaries of pleasure and looking for that next bigger. There are the things that we come back to that we know turn each other on and verying play with others is always a way of experiencing the same thing being done slightly differently.

    Do others feel like this I wonder that as time goes on you seek and look for that bigger better climax ..? Or am I alone in that I am just not happy and always want more ;-)

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    ShannonMarlene [sign in to see picture]
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    I think that's fairly normal.
    I know I certainly look back at older toys and think about how tame and boring they are to me now!

    1398769364
    kc. [sign in to see picture]
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    Yes I think it's fairly normal too. I keep buying/ trying various sex toys when the previous ones are really just as good. I love size, but as my wife says it doesn't really matter. It's all in the mind and the eye.

    Porn is one area. Years ago it was just straight. These days anal, squirting, fisting etc, but actually it is now just rather common place and not that stimulating in some ways so we actaully hardly ever watch it.

    Thankfully we just get on and do it.

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    rose hip [sign in to see picture]
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    More more more certainly seems to be popular around here. I went the other route. A while back I was becoming desensitised to vibrations and kept looking for more, but that would numb me so more power didn't work either. Then a death in the family and other things led to a break from toys for a few months.

    When things settled down I found that all of my sensitivity had returned. One of the toys I started using then was the Minna Ola, which has a pad you can press to set your own patterns. It was perfect for where my body was at that time and instead of going more more, I went less less - to the point where I'm now able to bring myself to orgasm through kundalini-type work and the barest of touches.

    When I was craving more, my orgasms were either desparate or far too quick, short term fixes which left me frustrated. By slowing it all down, keeping the power levels low and everything light, it is all so much more delicious.

    I know I'm in the minority here, but perhaps a few others might be willing to give it a try, just to see what happens. If more more more is what's normal, I'm quite happy to not be.

    1398770091
    BrumGuy [sign in to see picture]
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    We bought a couple of E-stim (electro stimulators) that were fun at the time. I think we all drift from one type of satisfaction to another, after all variety is the spice of life. They were fun at the time being restrained and wearing a penis band and having my dick dance to the beat of some music, or voice activated and afraid to make a noise. lol

    Bugger it. I'm off to get some new batteries. ;-)

    Enjoy x

    1398772558
    BrumGuy [sign in to see picture]
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    Rose Hip. Betty Dodson warned about useing a too powerful vibe in her 'Self Loving' video. She suggested using a pad between the clit and the vibe to avoide doing damage to the nerves. We only have to look at the amount of 'coal miners' that have White Knuckle nerve damage. But isn't that how we as a society went, wanting it now, cant wait. So my advice to everyone would be to give yourself a few minutes more and enjoy a leisurely session.

    I think I know where you'r cumming from with the kundalini. (sorry for the pun) we went through a phase of tantric in the 70's (I know I'm an old fxxxxx) and had some of the most powerfull orgasms without thrusting. I've since had an injury to my sacrium and lower spine. :-(

    Some of the best sex starts between the ears. We just have to develop it.

    Enjoy x

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    Fluffbags [sign in to see picture]
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    For me, it isnt the bigger, faster, better that does it for me....its variety. Variety is the spice of life and all that.

    The truth is things become boring and mundane if they are repeated in the same way over and over. The same applies to our sex life and our fantasies. We evolve. Our sex lifes evolve.

    I am imagining that you (and most people) feel the same, because I imagine that you do not ALWAYS want big, fast and furious. This in itself would become a habit that would become mundane. If your goal was to always go from A to Z as fast and intensely as possible.

    No, instead it is the variety that titilates our minds. Yes, sometimes you just really fancy a quick, powerful orgasm using that bone shaking vibrator, but sometimes I want the leisurely build up, the tease with my partner, the intimacy, the naughtiness, the tenderness. Other days I might fancy rough and ready, a firmer manual stimulation but not want to use a sex toy. Different moods daily! lol

    I also fell victim of the issues caused by consistently relying on a powerful vibrator to reach orgasm. I began relying on it because it was quick and easy. Over time though, it even became difficult to orgasm with the powerful vibrator, as my clitoris had become numb to it.

    Like Rosehip described, I stopped using the vibrator for a while. It was frustrating at first because it look a while to reach orgasm manually, but over a few weeks my sensitivity came back and now I was able to reach orgasm again from the soft touch of oral sex, or either of us using fingers. The orgasms were INTENSE too, because they lasted so much longer and felt so much deeper.

    For me, the intensity of the orgasm comes from the emotions and the fantasy and connection. I also enjoy BDSM and I don't feel a need to push for the next "big thing" for example "Well, i've tied you up, now lets try suspension!" It is really hard to explain why, but "bigger, harder faster" does not appeal so much as "How do we feel within the scene" and in my experience, I do not need to keep upping the ante to produce mind blowing orgasms for myself or my partner. Of course, my method is the opposite to yours. I like to draw things out, slow them down, tease and give just a little then take away. I find anticipation is a huge turn-on. I think the best way to explain is: I prefer stimulating his mind and letting his body follow, than stimulating his body and letting his mind follow.

    Plus, if you rush through one experience, thinking about the next, you are never really in the moment. You don't stop by to take time to really appreciate all the nuances and thrills within. Its like ticking boxes and moving on. If that makes sense?

    Nowadays I always make sure I keep it mixed up, so that my body doesnt get "used" to just one kind of stimulation. By the way, men can suffer from this too. Its referred to as "death grip syndrome" for anyone interested in Googling.

    Anyway, I feel that is the trick...Variety is definitely preferable (to me) than constantly chasing "bigger, harder, faster"

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    repliquant [sign in to see picture]
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    NWTVFiona wrote:

    but I did wonder if its like this with others... pushing the boundaries of pleasure and looking for that next bigger.

    Sure — there is always something bigger to take ;)

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