• How sexy is confidence?

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    Fluffbags wrote:

    Confidence is super sexy, but there is definitely a line and if the person steps over into over confidence, or cockiness, it is a big turn off.

    Confidence is feeling comfortable in your skin and relaxed enough to be naked, raw and honest with your partner. Overconfidence is being so in love with your body that you think you are doing your partner some kind of favour by "doing them the honour" of sleeping with them.

    Having the confidence to make the first moves, to make suggestions and to be able to speak up about your desires is sexy...Over confidence in this area is demanding, not giving 50/50 and assuming you know what is best and you KNOW what your partner wants.

    I could go on, but yes confidence is definitely very sexy, but over confidence is not!

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    Gentle giant [sign in to see picture]
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    Lollipop ;) wrote:

    Fluffbags wrote:

    Confidence is super sexy, but there is definitely a line and if the person steps over into over confidence, or cockiness, it is a big turn off.

    Confidence is feeling comfortable in your skin and relaxed enough to be naked, raw and honest with your partner. Overconfidence is being so in love with your body that you think you are doing your partner some kind of favour by "doing them the honour" of sleeping with them.

    Having the confidence to make the first moves, to make suggestions and to be able to speak up about your desires is sexy...Over confidence in this area is demanding, not giving 50/50 and assuming you know what is best and you KNOW what your partner wants.

    I could go on, but yes confidence is definitely very sexy, but over confidence is not!

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    matyhaty [sign in to see picture]
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    Kashyfox, its just behind you , your find it shortly

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    Trouble Loves Me [sign in to see picture]
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    Sexual confidence is a massive turn on. Fake it 'til you make it.

    Having said that, that moment when your OH tells you about their little insecurities can lead to a huge emotional connection which, in turn, makes for even better sex, so it's swings and roundabouts really..

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    Gladiator69 [sign in to see picture]
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    My wife is stunning, with a superb, well-toned figure. She still moans about how big her bum is.

    Does it annoy me? Not really. I like that she needs to be reasurred even after all this time. Maybe I'm just an old-fashioned cave man.

    I've spent a lot of time training my body over the years and been accused of being cocky and much worse by people who don't even know me. It's unfair. When you take care of yourself and are involved in combat sports / competitive sports like myself, you can't affort to be a wallflower or you'll get sand kicked in your face.

    Confidence gets you on in life, but like others say, no-one likes a show-off.

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    Ethíri [sign in to see picture]
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    The guys who I've ended up being the absolute most attracted to, usually started out as the kind of guys that I "wouldn't even give the time of day to", as mean as that sounds.

    Confidence is almost everything.

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    PinkPolkaDot [sign in to see picture]
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    love addict wrote:

    it swings both ways for me, I'm not at all confindent and quite often I've been attracted to someone similar who understands me on that level. Having said that, I find it incredibly sexy if a man wants me and has the confidence to tell me, although as others have said, it can be a fine line. What I initially saw as sexy confidence in my ex turned out to be arrogance.

    This! Exactly this, even the ex thing. I find confidence sexy because it helps me with my confidence issues but I also love people who are shy because I know exactly what that feels like. I guess I have no hope in finding a partner because I completely lack confidence and it looks like that's what everyone wants. But I have no problem walking around naked - in fact I love it. I love wearing lingerie and only really notice my flaws if someone points them out or I see them looking at a particular part of my body and start over-thinking along the lines of 'omg they're staring at my stretch marks, they must hate them'. I fake it til I make it in sexy situations but I'm hopeless any other time.
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    Ethíri [sign in to see picture]
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    PinkPolkaDot wrote:

    love addict wrote:

    it swings both ways for me, I'm not at all confindent and quite often I've been attracted to someone similar who understands me on that level. Having said that, I find it incredibly sexy if a man wants me and has the confidence to tell me, although as others have said, it can be a fine line. What I initially saw as sexy confidence in my ex turned out to be arrogance.

    This! Exactly this, even the ex thing. I find confidence sexy because it helps me with my confidence issues but I also love people who are shy because I know exactly what that feels like. I guess I have no hope in finding a partner because I completely lack confidence and it looks like that's what everyone wants. But I have no problem walking around naked - in fact I love it. I love wearing lingerie and only really notice my flaws if someone points them out or I see them looking at a particular part of my body and start over-thinking along the lines of 'omg they're staring at my stretch marks, they must hate them'. I fake it til I make it in sexy situations but I'm hopeless any other time.

    Keep in mind that you are in a sex talk forum, so a lot of people here may possibly be more confident than the average person - so they may just be looking more for people fairly similar to themselves (but I can't speak for others obv). You seem bright and sweet, you shouldn't lose hope. You know what people say, "soon as you stop looking for something it walks into your life" and all that jazz. :)

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    Jonnyjonjon [sign in to see picture]
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    I agree too with previous posts.

    From my male persepctive, a confident woman is incredibly sexy but like other have said its a fine line between arrogance and cockyness.

    For me a confident woman isn't neccessarily someone who is confident all the time, which sounds a bit crazy, but they are able to overcome it with their own self belief - if that makes sense?

    For example for me its the way my OH holds herself when we go out for a posh meal; the way she elegantly walks to the table with a gleaming smile and bright eyes because of the self belief she has in herself that she looks gorgeousin her dress... but 30 minutes earlier was fretting that the dress is too revealing or clingy to her 'wobbly bits'.... that to me is incredibly attractive becasue she overcomes it and indulges in the feeling of looking gorgeous, which I think enhances her confidence.

    It's a 'grounded confidence' if you will, that I find incredibly attractive :-)

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    mrs average [sign in to see picture]
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    Confidence, self belief and contentment are attractive charactersistics.
    Arrogance, delusion, being big headed is very off putting.

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    DavidB1986 [sign in to see picture]
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    Confidence is extremely sexy to me.

    But at the same time, I quite a little shyness too ;)

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