Me and my OH have had a few toys for years but don't often use them, she has to be in the right mood. But one killer is the temperature, we have Fun Factory silicon vibrators and I tend to warm them up under the tap which helps, but the lube is always cold, we have a bottle which can't really be warmed. I get her pretty wet and horny before we start with the toy but she always needs a little lube and it makes her jump out of her skin, she is ok once eventually but I want a less shock factor moment for her.
What about putting the tube of lube in hot water for a while before hand so it warms up.
My wife loves the difference between cold and hot, glass dildos are exceptionally good for temperature fun, either hot or cold. You can also use a lube that has a heat affect to it, which my wife loves. She loves it when my hands and fingers are cold too and we have in the past even had fun with an ice lolly.