• being dom'd

    1386430041
    mrbigpackage [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 66
    • Joined: 23 Feb 2013

    me and my OH are going to tie each other up 2nite just wanna know from a stright mans point of view what im 2 expect (never done it before) xxx

    1386442468
    Sum Sub [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4218
    • Joined: 4 Dec 2012

    I would recommend only tying one person up at a time otherwise it might be a bit Erm restricted

    :)

    1386443083
    Just Jenson [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3094
    • Joined: 19 Dec 2009

    Expect what you are both comfortable with doing to yourselves and each other.

    1386451397
    Curly Wurly [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 138
    • Joined: 22 Jan 2013

    Expect to not be able to move much..

    1386451422
    dh [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 374
    • Joined: 8 Dec 2009

    Either discuss before hand what your limits are, or make sure you communicate a lot. Maybe agree a couple of safe words before hand, one to mean 'slow down' and the other to mean 'stop right now and untie me'. Something obscure and distinct-sounding is good so there's no uncertainty in the 'heat of the moment'

    1386452792
    LilMissFrustrated [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1057
    • Joined: 9 Aug 2011

    Agree safe words. Keep scissors handy or spare keys. Calling the fire brigade is not to be recommended. :-).

    1386453262
    Scorpius12 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 6256
    • Joined: 18 Dec 2007

    dh wrote:

    Either discuss before hand what your limits are, or make sure you communicate a lot. Maybe agree a couple of safe words before hand, one to mean 'slow down' and the other to mean 'stop right now and untie me'. Something obscure and distinct-sounding is good so there's no uncertainty in the 'heat of the moment'

    +1

    1386505295
    etc28 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 68
    • Joined: 10 Jun 2009

    expect it to be alot of fun, my OH loves being tied up and I love being tied up by her, but obviously make sure you're both in the same place and that she isnt going to bring out the whips and paddles you didnt know she had as soon as you're tied up lol

    1386506941
    wolfgirl82 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 41
    • Joined: 8 Aug 2013

    I recommend deciding between you which of you will be doing the tying up and taking charge and just keeping it to one of you for that 'session'. Switching around might be confusing. Like the others have said, set boundaries so you're both aware of how far you're willing to take it.

    1386545392
    Ms.Bradley [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 33
    • Joined: 27 Sep 2013

    Good luck.

    hope you both enjoyed it :)

    1386620437
    Miss O [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 29
    • Joined: 8 Nov 2013

    All the safety recommendations, as above. Cannot understate the importance.

    Guess you guys have probably done the deed now, but just a couple of things if you enjoyed it and decide to carry on...

    If your session gets especially intense, make sure that not only do you remain aware of your limits and boundaries during, but ensure that you wind down properly afterwards.

    How you do this varies depending on the couple - some people need to talk, some people need physical contact, some need to clean up etc. - personally me and my OH tend to hold each other for a while, chat about what we just did and what parts we enjoyed. If aftercare is negelected the sub in particular can experience 'sub drop', which can manifest as flu-like symptoms and despression (http://www.differentequals.com/subdrop.html)

    BDSM sessions can have strong and sometimes unexpected physical and emotional effects on either party, especially if you're new to it. Make sure you create a space where honesty and trust are paramount. Make sure you've got clear heads - avoid consuming too much alcohol beforehand.

    Last but not least - talk! Talk about what you want, how you want it, what your fantasies are, what your boundaries are... Communication is key for BDSM to be enjoyable for both parties, even if it's not something you're going to be doing frequently. Enjoy yourselves.

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.