• Maintaining erection

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    FrumCouple [sign in to see picture]
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    So here is the thing, I'm in my 20s and rather healthy (eat healthy, exercise and haven't needed a doctor in ages). I never thought I would have such problems at this age but lately I've been having trouble maintaining an erection. It doesn't happen every time but last night was the third time in a month. You can imagine its very frustrating for me and OH.

    Now I'm pretty sure it's stress related (situation coming up at work that I pretty much have no control over, yet for some reason have to be involved), and except for removing myself from the stressfull situation are there any other things that can be done to fix this?

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    Stuburns [sign in to see picture]
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    Penis rings are great. They help maintain an erection. Actually make it stronger too. I love using them. I prefer the more expensive ones. They tend to be a better quality and offer a little more restriction making it very hard. They are plenty of cheap options you can try if you have never used one.

    1386086244
    FrumCouple [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks!

    Anything in particiular?

    1386086492
    StHubbins [sign in to see picture]
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    This came up recently (excuse the pun) and so it's worth having a read through this thread:

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/community/forums/sex-tips-and-talk/818332-erectile-dysfunction-how-do-you-talk-about

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    FrumCouple [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks, that thread speaks mostly about communication which thankfully isn't an issue here.

    As to the medical advice, would drugs like Viagra be applicable here or are they there only to treat physical causes?

    1386090264
    Stuburns [sign in to see picture]
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    Wouldn't go down the drugs avenue. Doesn't really sound like you need it.

    1386090607
    Stuburns [sign in to see picture]
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    This to try first maybe. I liked this. Didn't last long but was a great start

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=16962

    Currently use this a lot. Great quality to and j love what it does.

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=24097

    Read my reviews on them

    1386090692
    StHubbins [sign in to see picture]
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    FrumCouple wrote:

    Thanks, that thread speaks mostly about communication which thankfully isn't an issue here.

    As to the medical advice, would drugs like Viagra be applicable here or are they there only to treat physical causes?

    Assuming Viagra works for you, it can be used for psychological as well as some physical causes. In the UK, it is prescribed for some physical causes such as diabetes, but I was recommended it by my doctor for psychological ED.

    To be honest, the doctor didn't have that deep an understanding of ED and the things that have helped me is no porn and pelvic floor exercises. Having said that, Viagra made me realise that nothing is wrong and I went from taking one, quickly down to taking a half and now I don't take it unless planning a long session and then only a quarter or at most a half (essentially, using it recreationally). The thing to avoid is that you think you can only have sex with Viagra.

    This is an edited version of my post in the thread I linked to:

    We've been through this and it almost certainly is resolvable. The problem is that there are many causes and probably more than one is having an effect.

    The first thing to rule out is physical and this requires a visit to the doctors. If there's no physical cause from the docs it doesn't mean that it's not physical, it just means that it's not diabetes, blood pressure, prostate cancer etc.

    Rule out stress in job or relationship, by dealing with these however is appropriate. This didn't apply to me, so I'm not the best person to give advice on this.

    The next thing is pelvic floor. This gets weaker as you get older and needs regular exercise. There's lots of guides online for this and there are electrical devices very similar to the machine on the sex toy testers at the moment (http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=29582), but with an anal rather than vaginal probe.

    Then we've got psychological. This is almost a certainty. Whatever the root cause is, as soon as there's a problem, you worry about it and this causes a problem. Viagra can help with this. Take one, it all works, you know that your body works. Move down to three quarters, then a half, then a quarter, then realise you can do it without Viagra. For cheap, regulated Viagra, have a look at the list of outlets here http://www.erectiledysfunctionclinic.co.uk/viagra.php

    Then there's drugs and alcohol. I gave up everything at first (caffeine, alcohol, the lot). For me, this didn't do much, but for some this is the cause. I've stayed off alcohol though, just because I prefer not drinking.

    Then there's porn. I think this affected me and I gave it up. There's a video here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSF82AwSDiU and lots of info here http://www.yourbrainonporn.com/

    All of these (except Viagra) take time. It could be six months before you get results and so it takes a lot of commitment.

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    FrumCouple [sign in to see picture]
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    StHubbins wrote:

    Assuming Viagra works for you, it can be used for psychological as well as some physical causes. In the UK, it is prescribed for some physical causes such as diabetes, but I was recommended it by my doctor for psychological ED.

    To be honest, the doctor didn't have that deep an understanding of ED and the things that have helped me is no porn and pelvic floor exercises. Having said that, Viagra made me realise that nothing is wrong and I went from taking one, quickly down to taking a half and now I don't take it unless planning a long session and then only a quarter or at most a half (essentially, using it recreationally). The thing to avoid is that you think you can only have sex with Viagra.

    I'd rather not go down the drug route unless I have to, between all the reasons given I'm pretty sure I narrowed it down to stress.

    1386091850
    StHubbins [sign in to see picture]
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    FrumCouple wrote:

    I'd rather not go down the drug route unless I have to, between all the reasons given I'm pretty sure I narrowed it down to stress.

    The other thing I didn't mention is your partner. If she's happy to help then it makes it a lot easier. Often, you just need to stop your head worrying about it. If she completely surprises you and instigates sex at an unexpected time and/or place, then you don't have time to think about it. You might well not have a problem due to not having thinking time. If this works then you know you can do it, you don't worry about it and you then don't have a problem.

    It's a vicious cycle that worrying about it causes it, but confidence that it won't happen also fixes it.

    The other thing is to not think that it's one problem. I got rid of everything that might be a problem and then, when everything was OK, experimanted by reintroducing things. This has led me to the conclusion that it was pelvic floor and porn for me, but everyone is going to be different.

    Finally, remember that it can take a long time to fix so don't think something's not working because results aren't immediate. It took me six months to completely get over ED.

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    FrumCouple [sign in to see picture]
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    Thankfully my OH is supportive, though I do believe she has her self doubts that she doesn't want to surface in order not to upset me.

    The one thing that scares me most is falling into the vicious cycle, last night we were in middle of a particiolarly lovely session and I remember thinking "I hope it doesn't die on me, tonight would be a bad night for that to happen" and I think it was downhill from there...

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    tinytheturtle [sign in to see picture]
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    try cials 5 mg it is helping me out starting to get morning woodys now and woodys during the day also i am in my late 50's so i think it great that it works again

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