• Ladies

    1385592689
    WildThing [sign in to see picture]
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    *** Smile broadens and fingers slip apart - eyes peek though the hand covering face ***

    As an aside... if you continue to shave below the perenium area (as male or female) to remove hairs at the very base of the testicles and towards to bottom-hole area, you may wish to consider the longevity of this situation.

    If this is a short term 'mowing' and you intend to allow this lawn to regrow - beware. Irregular lawn care in this area can result in stubbly regrowth, immense itching as the skin rubs and insanity during the course of your daily life. This may result in emotional distress.

    No amount of Witch Hazel Extract will cool this...................If you want a bowling green lawn.... use regular maintenence practices.......

    1385592891
    Sarah 77 [sign in to see picture]
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    Ha ha ha ha!

    Written very professionally there I have to say! Actually sounds like a leaflet to advertise your garden landscaping business lol!

    1385593060
    Gentle giant [sign in to see picture]
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    Ste wrote:

    Gilette do a powered product that uses their proglide blades and has three attachments for various lengths, both me and the missus use it. It's called Fusion ProGlide Styler Razor, it's in a plastic container and costs £15-20. Here's the link: http://www.gillette.com/en/us/Products/Razors/proglide-styler-beard-trimmer.aspx

    Highly recommend the King of Shaves gel, it's very very good and low foam so you can see exactly what you are doing, there's a green one for sensitive skin that works very well.

    The razor and the gel are the very same we use, my god

    1385593066
    Gentle giant [sign in to see picture]
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    Ste wrote:

    Gilette do a powered product that uses their proglide blades and has three attachments for various lengths, both me and the missus use it. It's called Fusion ProGlide Styler Razor, it's in a plastic container and costs £15-20. Here's the link: http://www.gillette.com/en/us/Products/Razors/proglide-styler-beard-trimmer.aspx

    Highly recommend the King of Shaves gel, it's very very good and low foam so you can see exactly what you are doing, there's a green one for sensitive skin that works very well.

    The razor and the gel are the very same we use, my god

    1385593722
    WildThing [sign in to see picture]
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    *** Hand removed from face, stands up and straightenes proudly.....***

    Lawn aftercare is an important area to consider also, as inappropriate use of additives and fertilisers may cause discomfort. For example, shaving these areas immediately prior to an intimate massage or use of widespread lube application might also result in itching and irritating results...

    It is far better to 'mow' these regions upto 1 day in advance of further fertilising, to prevent scorching of the lawn and long term discomfort. Materials such as silk lingerie and non-cotton underwear may also cause discomfort as they can sometimes 'cling' to the newly moisturised areas....

    Mowing the lawn hurriedly before leaving the premises in tight fitting undergarments, should be avoided as this will prevent scorching of these areas of grass.

    Further advice should be sought from qualified lawn care professionals......

    1385595113
    Sarah 77 [sign in to see picture]
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    OMG I am actually laughing my head off. Too funny for words!

    Very well written WildThing, I should expect to see articles of yours in Gardeners World magazine in the near future :)

    Sorry but pmsl!

    1385596919
    WildThing [sign in to see picture]
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    *** Pulls on green fleece with "Lawn Maintenance - we Trim your Quim" emblazoned across the back. Smiles and gestures to tool kit ***

    The storage and care of Lawn Maintenance tools should not be overlooked in this area. It should be noted that appropriate care over the type and serviceability of tools in the bathroom should be considered before using these to trim the grass.

    Blades should be kept sharp and free from debris. Razors should be renewed when blunt and always be wary of nicks or variations in the blade line, as these will, in turn, cut the mowing surface inadvertently. You should only use the blades attached to the mower, do not try to cut costs by using imitation blades as these will compromise the cut quality. Mower heads are not interchangeable.

    After use, you should always ensure that hairs are removed from the blades carefully, using fine tweezers if necessary. The razor should be stored upside down, especially varieties like Venus and the ultra glide variety as these will stick to other surfaces. Drying upside down also allows water to drain from and run off the blade, keeping them in better condition.

    Try to avoid tapping the blade on the sink, shower or bath surfaces as this will dent and damage them. Instead shake the blade vigorously under flowing water to remove loose hairs. A garden water feature is not a suitable source of this flow.

    Following these steps will ensure careful and trouble free maintenance of your lawn without the problems associated with inadequate blade care.

    1385598248
    Sarah 77 [sign in to see picture]
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    I am actually crying with laughter, what can I say to that!

    Absolutely brilliant, well written and a proper giggle!

    Nice one! :-)

    1385761723
    WildThing [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks Sarah 77 - you are too kind! :)

    1385762597
    Sarah 77 [sign in to see picture]
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    :-) :-) :-)

    1385762673
    WildThing [sign in to see picture]
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    :) :) Loving the profile pic too....

    Just wondering..... is there any more "topics of advice" that I could add to this.............. :/

    1385763062
    Sarah 77 [sign in to see picture]
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    Cheers! I spend a lot of time upside down lol

    Erm, I don't know! Thinking cap on.....

    1385763208
    WildThing [sign in to see picture]
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    Well.... I'm not sure I could do it..... but good one you.... Hi by the way.

    Get thinking.... Everyone else.... any ideas on shaving questions?

    1385763544
    Sarah 77 [sign in to see picture]
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    I can confirm that it is thee hardest form of fitness to partake in, you use every single muscle that exists in your body to do it. Thanks dude and hi! :-)

    Yes input people, we need more of WildThing's humorous adverts lol!

    1385767202
    wolfgirl82 [sign in to see picture]
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    Well if you take nothing else from this thread at least you'll know you can maintain a beautiful garden area around your home :)

    1385767426
    Sarah 77 [sign in to see picture]
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    Lol I know right? I think I am now an expert after reading all that!

    Anyway, bought a Wilkinson Sword Bikini thingy majiggy today with a razor at one end and a trimmer on the other. A two in one lol

    1385828699
    WildThing [sign in to see picture]
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    *** Raises eyebrows at the sound of this discussion... "Two in one" you say ***

    As with many lawn care activities and garden maintenance tasks, multitasking should be generally avoided, as many of the tools and devices yielded around the garden (& bathroom) could cause serious injury if misused.

    The prospect of "Trimming" and "Mowing" simultaneously is not advised as adverse lawn patters may be created which are difficult to undo. In addition, borders surrounding the "Mowing" area might become disturbed if you are wielding two tools at the same time.

    When using an electric strimmer device, ensure that the 'grass' to be trimmed is soft and unmatted. Preferably conduct this after a bath as the hair follicles will be softer and easier to manipulate. The trimmer should be used alone, without the "Mower" operating at the other end. This will prevent areas of the garden from becoming unnaturally mown while trimming commences!

    When you have finished "strimming" - remove excess hair from the strimmer device. If allowed, you may be able to wash this under running water - check the garden tool maintenance manuals for this advice. Strimming hair to a short length will make for easier shaving of this as the razor will not become clogged so quickly.

    1385829078
    Sarah 77 [sign in to see picture]
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    LOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!

    Very clever and very funny! 10/10!!!!

    1385829432
    WildThing [sign in to see picture]
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    :) :) :) :) Glad you liked it.... informative and entertaining.....

    1385829827
    Sarah 77 [sign in to see picture]
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    Indeed it was! Entertainment value 100%!

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