• Acceptable reason to decide wither you want to go on date No.2.

    1383749484
    Poppicat [sign in to see picture]
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    So I was at a friends gig and met what I though was a really nice guy. He was 6 years older into the same bands etc. We got chatting and swapped numbers.

    We chatted over text and facebook for a couple of weeks then went on a date. It went well and I was thinking that yes date number 2 was on the cards.

    Last night the subject of sex popped up, he started quizzing me on birth control etc. When I told him I had the coil fitted he said "Oh cool we won't have to use condoms then". (Red light No 1) I told him no we will be using condoms or we don't have sex. He said "I hardly ever use them as they are anoying and besides even if you use them you still get STIs" (Red light No2). So I asked him if he has ever had an STI, it turns out in the last year he has had Chlamydia twice and has Herpes outbreak 3 times. (Red light No3).

    I went quiet after that trying to figure out how to tell him maybe we are not a match. My health is really important to me as I haven't been very well recently. So I said to him unless we use protection all the time I do not see us going somewhere.

    Well he lost the plot asking me if I was being serious STIs are not that big a deal no one uses condoms now a days. Well I have only ever had unprotected sex with one person and we were both tested and only had a handful of partners between us and had always used condoms and were in a commited relationship.

    He even posted on facebook and i quote- " I really don't understand why girls are so pathetic its only cold sore virus its not bloody deadly".

    Please tell me I am not beingg silly with deciding not to go on date No2?

    1383749723
    crazy horse [sign in to see picture]
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    Avoid him like the plague. You are not being silly at all. If he is that lax about something so serious I wouldn't touch him.

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    -Chelsea [sign in to see picture]
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    I wouldn't even be questioning this. This guy sounds olike a right numpty!!

    Knowing a few people who suffer with HIV, I can tell you now that STI's are actually a big deal and have devastating repurcussions!

    The fact he seems ignorant of this and wants to brush your feelings under the carpet, automatically makes me think he has the emotional level of a potato. Did you know that having chlaymydia just once can leave you infertile?

    Delete him off Facebook and move on. Playing russian roulette with your health is never a good idea and if that's how he wants to live his life, then you're better off without.

    Cx x

    1383749874
    LilMissMardyBum [sign in to see picture]
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    if i was you i would not be going on date number 2

    All i can say is if he as that attitude about sexual health then he needs to learn a thing oh to about the more serious side hiv aids, those are life changing, and once you get them you will never get rid of them if a man does not take sexual health serious, i would not want him anywhere near me,

    Having had to take hiv meds after i was assulted, i can seriously say it was not nice they made me very ill, and i had no life it was so bad, i called the clinic and asked to be taken off them, i would have rather had developed aids, then been on hiv meds any longer i would not want for anyone to have to suffer with those meds,or the illness

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    Cornish89 [sign in to see picture]
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    Um hell no! There is no way you would get me on a second date with a guy like him!
    Sti's are not that big of a deal?! Wtf?!
    I've had sex without condoms with 2 partners, one I had been dating for 5/6months and had been using condoms with and then I told him I'd been on the pill the whole time and we both got tested and then only had sex without them when the results came back clear. And the second is my current partner and father of my 2 children!
    I would seriously never be speaking to him again!

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    kelly514 [sign in to see picture]
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    I fully understand that I know neither of you personally but from reading your post I think you would be crazy to go on date no 2. Gives me the impression he has no respect for you what so ever. Everyone deserves respect, you deserve better than thant.

    1383750146
    MissChar [sign in to see picture]
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    You are definitely not being silly. !!!!!

    I would be the exact same... Sexual health is NOT something to have a devil may care attitude towards! He sounds very ill informed despite apparently have STIs himself. Worrying...

    Also, the fact he went off at you about it, when he just said condoms were 'annoying' shows himself up to be a dick and very disrespectful to your wishes. And the fact he posted on fb about it, shows he's immature if you didn't already think that from his view on sexual health.

    you don't want dirty willy in you, that's your choice, it's your body, and it's a responsible and sensible one. The fact he said 'no one uses them' is not any kind of valid reason either.

    seriously, this guy, I would run a mile! Xxx

    1383750149
    Cornish89 [sign in to see picture]
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    Also "I hardly ever use them"- how many people is he sleeping with?!

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    chunkyg [sign in to see picture]
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    He's an idiot! You should avoid him and not question your judgement.

    1383750349
    sleepycelia [sign in to see picture]
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    Nooo! 'STI's aren't that big of a deal' is he serious? If chlamydia goes untreated for long enough it can cause PID and fertility problems, he sounds awful and incredibly disrespectful. Snide indirect Facebook posts don't exactly make him sound mature and rational either! I'd steer clear, you're not being silly at all.

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    PinkPolkaDot [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm surprised he's claimed STI's aren't that big of a deal when he's had more than one already. Definitely avoid this guy. If he doesn't care about his own health then he will never, ever care about anyone else in any way. It's obvious you are too different, you should just listen to your gut.

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    Stuburns [sign in to see picture]
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    He sounds like a teenager. He's had STI's before and they didn't seem to bother him. Tell him to sling his hook. It's people like him that still cause the spread of STI's.

    1383751395
    Draven [sign in to see picture]
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    Poppicat wrote:

    He even posted on facebook and i quote- " I really don't understand why girls are so pathetic its only cold sore virus its not bloody deadly".

    Please tell me I am not beingg silly with deciding not to go on date No2?

    no to date No 2 and a post on his FB saying:

    "I cant believe you take STIs so lightly and that you refuse to use condoms, dont come sniffing round me again...."

    yeah he'll block you but anyone that sees it will know exactly what he's like.... or is that a bit evil?

    1383751575
    PinkPolkaDot [sign in to see picture]
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    Draven wrote:

    Poppicat wrote:

    He even posted on facebook and i quote- " I really don't understand why girls are so pathetic its only cold sore virus its not bloody deadly".

    Please tell me I am not beingg silly with deciding not to go on date No2?

    no to date No 2 and a post on his FB saying:

    "I cant believe you take STIs so lightly and that you refuse to use condoms, dont come sniffing round me again...."

    yeah he'll block you but anyone that sees it will know exactly what he's like.... or is that a bit evil?

    He sounds like someone who would turn it into an argument rather than block to be honest. And the one thing you want to avoid (as well as his infected willy) is public arguments. They're immature, which is exactly what I'd expect from him. But then again that could be useful information for other women.

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    DavidB1986 [sign in to see picture]
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    As echoed by everyone else you are most definitely not being silly! He sounds like a complete and utter misogynist, and his utter lack of regard for his own sexual well being, let alone your own is disturbing enough in the least! Definitely do not consider pursuing this further! x

    1383752357
    wildflower [sign in to see picture]
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    He sounds like a complete idiot and very ignorant about STI's . As for putting up all that rubbish on facebook, hopefully this will act as a warning to other women to avoid him.

    You are certainly not being silly in deciding not to go on another date x

    1383752432
    sexymancchic [sign in to see picture]
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    Run, run for the hills, the guys a fool. STI's aren't a big deal??? well ermmm yes in fact they are a huge deal. Ewww he's making my skin crawl and I don't even know him! I know quite a few young lads and they have all said they always use a condom ALWAYS because in they're words "I don't wonna be getting a dose from no one" so if lads of 16,17,18,19 can be grown up about sexual health then why can't a grown man???

    1383753125
    taraman [sign in to see picture]
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    Avoid like the plague!

    1. He's an idiot and his entire approach to you, sex and life is just wrong.

    2. The number and variation of STIs suggest a very cavalier approach to sex and sexual partners. He has a clear history of having unprotected sex with people who have infections. For all you know he has HIV as well....

    3. The FB rant and attitude generally suggests a generally unbalanced individual.

    1383755251
    pacnatman [sign in to see picture]
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    To be candid, I'm surprised that you are even asking. If he was the last man on planet Earth, and your horniness was pushing you to the very edge of sanity, I would still suggest that you remain celibate; permanently, if necessary.

    It's not that he wants to have sex on a second date or that he even wants to have it unprotected, it is his inability and unwillingness to take "No" for an answer, irrespective of what the subject matter is and no matter the context in which the "No" is couched.

    He has all the emotional intelligence and maturity of a 5 year-old. Even if you go on a second date with him and don't have sex or have protected sex, you are, irrespective, going to get an constant barrage of this childish behaviour. If you have protected sex on the second date, he will want to have it unprotected on a third date and if he doesn't get it then he will moan and moan incessantly, and maybe even get abusive about it.

    Do you really want to put up with that sort of rubbish? I know for certain, I wouldn't. Apart from which he is almost certainly looking for any and every opportunity to shag just about anything that has a heart-beat and maybe even more than that.

    You already know all this.

    1383755748
    Scorpius12 [sign in to see picture]
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    MissChar wrote:

    You are definitely not being silly. !!!!!

    I would be the exact same... Sexual health is NOT something to have a devil may care attitude towards! He sounds very ill informed despite apparently have STIs himself. Worrying...

    Also, the fact he went off at you about it, when he just said condoms were 'annoying' shows himself up to be a dick and very disrespectful to your wishes. And the fact he posted on fb about it, shows he's immature if you didn't already think that from his view on sexual health.

    you don't want dirty willy in you, that's your choice, it's your body, and it's a responsible and sensible one. The fact he said 'no one uses them' is not any kind of valid reason either.

    seriously, this guy, I would run a mile! Xxx

    +1

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