• Do you prefer being the Dom or Sub?

    boobaloo [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
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    • Joined: 9 Jul 2010

    lickmadick wrote:

    oh yes they have eveready just a few glasses of wine and the whip comes down mate

    or southern comfort on the rare occasion when I can be persuaded to take control that is

    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
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    • Joined: 2 Feb 2008

    Dirty Red Angel wrote:

    I want to be sub but my OH just doesn't quite get what I want..........despite direction - work in progress.

    But I love to be dominated! Mmmmmmm

    We were like this! But with time and lots of encouragement.....gradually we're pushing boundaries and things get better each time we play sub/dom! Last night was the latest example and it was leaps and bounds on from the last time! Don't get me wrong - I enjoy every form of sub/dom play we partake in and the "stronger" stuff isn't always something I'm in the right frame of mind - but my goodness last night was incredible!

    I like the route we've taken though - very gradual....given me the chance to understand what I want/need from a sub/dom session and him the chance to gradually build up and therefore feel absolutely sure that 1) I'd tell him if something was too much and 2) that I want something in particular and he understands the *reason*. That way he can experiment with *other* things that I may not have thought of but are based in similar emotions!

    This post isn't written very well (my head is "cabbaged" due to a bad bug) but I hope it makes some kind of sense!


    Cuddly Hubby [sign in to see picture]
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    A (platonic) female friend once said to me that I'd make a good Dom*. I was puzzled by this, because I'm not generally a bossy or domineering type. She explained to me that a good Dom isn't the stereotypical power-crazed sadist, but rather someone with the sensitivity to gain the trust of a sub and take control from them (with their permission), as well as the understanding and imagination to create situations that work for the sub. That changed my perspective considerably and so I'm prepared to say that I prefer a Dom role, although I think it's a more demanding task than a sub role.

    * I've been flattered and astonished by some of the subjects that my firmly platonic female friends have been prepared to discuss with me -- but then, I suppose that's sort of the point about us being firmly platonic.

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