• Secrets and OH

    1375119406

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2993
    • Joined: 25 Apr 2013

    A bit Jeremy Kyle! Hahaha yeah

    put something on the end of it!

    Don't worry about them, they should be at work!

    It's kids having kids!

    Does everyone do nothing but have sex all day!

    I'm paying for your child and for you to smoke weed!

    1375119413
    Viridianuk [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 107
    • Joined: 21 Jul 2006

    I was just getting a bit frustrated....

    1375119431
    Secretary Clairey [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 14
    • Joined: 29 Jul 2013

    ok ok!! had a long chat with one of my friends too, new plan in action now!

    1375119443
    Viridianuk [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 107
    • Joined: 21 Jul 2006

    Lol lollipop

    1375119492

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2993
    • Joined: 25 Apr 2013

    Sorry couldn't help it lol ;)

    1375119516
    LilMissMardyBum [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1870
    • Joined: 22 Jun 2013

    :)

    1375119518
    LilMissMardyBum [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1870
    • Joined: 22 Jun 2013

    Lol Lollipop gotta love jk

    1375119613
    Fluffbags [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2219
    • Joined: 18 Oct 2011

    Secretary Clairey wrote:

    I think alot of the reason the sex is so good though is just because it is naughty. Meeting at a hotel, dressing all naughty and being secret is a huge turn on, is that just to me or....

    Sex is definitely hot when it feels dirty and naughty and like you are sneaking around and it is all illicit and frantic and hot and you will have amazing orgasms and then....

    Destroy someone elses heart and soul because of your own selfish desires for some hot sex.

    It is quite simple. If you put your own hot and amazing orgasms above the heart and soul of your partner and are prepared to crush them in search of your own pleasure then you don't love them. You don't even respect them. Most people walk away from affairs with huge guilt because they realise the impact of such a thing. You don't seem to really care for much or feel any guilt. All you keep mentioning is how good it is for you. Why even come here and ask if it is wrong? You know it is and don't seem to care so long as lover boy gets to paw at those stockings you refuse to wear for hubby. Erghh. No ....I am out of this convo. It seems like a troll!

    I say it every time and it is simple, even though folks tell me it is not: If you want to sleep with other people while in a monogamous relationship, either quell your desires or leave your partner. There is no excuse for crushing someone elses heart, even if your concern is "ooooh but I will lose the house if we split up" then don't split up and go without sex. Its a hard decision but it is a simple one too. Either the marriage and what comes with that (The house, money, kids, joint accounts whatever) OR leave that for someone else. In an ideal world you may want the mind blowing sex and the security and monotony of a marriage but it doesn't work like that. You just have to WORK at things sometimes.

    Cheating really hurts someone.

    1375121770
    MrsMcX [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1949
    • Joined: 15 Feb 2013

    Clearly in this case...ignorance is bliss. Regretting my input.

    1375121888
    blonde vixen13 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2083
    • Joined: 23 Jun 2012

    I recently found out my mum was having an affair after looaing weight and going through a midlifw crisis. Your not just cheating on your husband but cheating on your family. I will never forgive my mum for what she has done, so much so that I refused to speak to her during theist four months of my pregnancy and refused tort her be at the birth. We now talk but our relationship will never be the same.
    Just think about what you are doing. Your risking loosing your entire family. This is a time when your husband needs you the most and you clearly don't love him if you can go out and have sex with other people whilst he is in a hospital bed.
    My dad now knows of my mums affair and they made the decision to make ago of there relationship. They do date nights, are going on holiday and buy each other gifts. They are determined to get things back on track. If you love your husband you would be doing the same.

    1375124086
    S&S [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 438
    • Joined: 13 Feb 2011

    You cheated.

    'Nuff said.

    1375125513
    Khaleesi [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 383
    • Joined: 1 Jun 2012

    Naughty nurse 85 wrote:

    Your not just cheating on your husband but cheating on your family.

    Fluffbags wrote:

    Secretary Clairey wrote:

    I think alot of the reason the sex is so good though is just because it is naughty. Meeting at a hotel, dressing all naughty and being secret is a huge turn on, is that just to me or....

    Sex is definitely hot when it feels dirty and naughty and like you are sneaking around and it is all illicit and frantic and hot and you will have amazing orgasms and then....

    Destroy someone elses heart and soul because of your own selfish desires for some hot sex.

    It is quite simple. If you put your own hot and amazing orgasms above the heart and soul of your partner and are prepared to crush them in search of your own pleasure then you don't love them. You don't even respect them. Most people walk away from affairs with huge guilt because they realise the impact of such a thing. You don't seem to really care for much or feel any guilt. All you keep mentioning is how good it is for you. Why even come here and ask if it is wrong? You know it is and don't seem to care so long as lover boy gets to paw at those stockings you refuse to wear for hubby. Erghh. No ....I am out of this convo. It seems like a troll!

    I say it every time and it is simple, even though folks tell me it is not: If you want to sleep with other people while in a monogamous relationship, either quell your desires or leave your partner. There is no excuse for crushing someone elses heart, even if your concern is "ooooh but I will lose the house if we split up" then don't split up and go without sex. Its a hard decision but it is a simple one too. Either the marriage and what comes with that (The house, money, kids, joint accounts whatever) OR leave that for someone else. In an ideal world you may want the mind blowing sex and the security and monotony of a marriage but it doesn't work like that. You just have to WORK at things sometimes.

    Cheating really hurts someone.

    I agree with the above posts. Very to the point and true.

    And MrsMc X don't regret your input at all! We're all here to offer our opinions and give the best advise we can and you have, so don't think on it :) Xx

    1375128450
    chubber [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 90
    • Joined: 13 Dec 2008

    Bugger thought i was reading my life of 2 year ago,talk to your husband all realationships go stale,all this deceit and lies aint worth the heartache you will cause if you get caught out,dont think you wont as you will,us blokes aint stupid,to be honest you throwing this affair in his face by wearing stockings to work,this is showing no respect for him,remember the kids in this too.

    1375128533
    naughty stacey [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 176
    • Joined: 28 Aug 2012

    It is hard once you both get into a rut of no sex (or sexiness) as you both feed the rut. One of you tries a little and the other can't respond right, you take refusal to personaly and sink back into the dark little corner and refuse the others advances in turn. My OH and I were there.

    It was difficult and awkward, instead of cheating we clawed our way back to a normal sex life nice and slow. It was worth it.

    1375132163
    S&S [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 438
    • Joined: 13 Feb 2011

    Heavens Poison wrote:

    Could this just be a post to get people arguing seems all a bit fishy to me,joins today and comes on with a kind of post that is sure going to start a heated debate, also would you not be kinda worried to show your face if you were cheating on your hubby incase someone noticed you and let slip to your hubby what you were doing anyway just a random thought this might be a genuine post sorry if this is the case no offence intended if it is

    I'm inclined to agree, this does smell a bit trolly.

    1375134006
    Alastor [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 819
    • Joined: 15 May 2013

    I always find it rather interesting that almost all responses in such discussions are totally anti cheating, becuse it would tend to suggest that 'cheaters' are in a serious minority. Yet I don't remember finding figures quoted by 'sexologists' (to use a catch-all term) that gave me that impression.

    That pseudo-entity 'the Web' has enormous quantities of folks not only admitting to illicit affairs but actively seeking opportunities to conduct the same. (Though many are probably fulfilled in fantasy only).

    Is it that this is still a 'taboo' area of sexuality where those that practice it are still afraid of the negative reaction caused if they admit to it or support it? You can be gay, bi, transgender, psychologically dominant to alarming degrees, but having 'sex on the side' is still outside the pale?

    Just a thought.

    1375134863
    rose hip [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1166
    • Joined: 19 Aug 2010

    S&S wrote:

    Heavens Poison wrote:

    Could this just be a post to get people arguing seems all a bit fishy to me,joins today and comes on with a kind of post that is sure going to start a heated debate, also would you not be kinda worried to show your face if you were cheating on your hubby incase someone noticed you and let slip to your hubby what you were doing anyway just a random thought this might be a genuine post sorry if this is the case no offence intended if it is

    I'm inclined to agree, this does smell a bit trolly.

    Third to that. Especially given the profile pic.

    1375134898
    bumblebee [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 574
    • Joined: 17 Sep 2008

    Alastor wrote:

    I always find it rather interesting that almost all responses in such discussions are totally anti cheating, becuse it would tend to suggest that 'cheaters' are in a serious minority. Yet I don't remember finding figures quoted by 'sexologists' (to use a catch-all term) that gave me that impression.

    That pseudo-entity 'the Web' has enormous quantities of folks not only admitting to illicit affairs but actively seeking opportunities to conduct the same. (Though many are probably fulfilled in fantasy only).

    Is it that this is still a 'taboo' area of sexuality where those that practice it are still afraid of the negative reaction caused if they admit to it or support it? You can be gay, bi, transgender, psychologically dominant to alarming degrees, but having 'sex on the side' is still outside the pale?

    Just a thought.

    all of which the person you love would know about. I'm all for open relationships, if you need sex outside of a relationship then cool, but only if your OH knows or is in agreement.

    cheating is just plain fucking wrong.

    1375135888
    Alastor [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 819
    • Joined: 15 May 2013

    bumblebee wrote:

    Alastor wrote:

    I always find it rather interesting that almost all responses in such discussions are totally anti cheating, becuse it would tend to suggest that 'cheaters' are in a serious minority. Yet I don't remember finding figures quoted by 'sexologists' (to use a catch-all term) that gave me that impression.

    That pseudo-entity 'the Web' has enormous quantities of folks not only admitting to illicit affairs but actively seeking opportunities to conduct the same. (Though many are probably fulfilled in fantasy only).

    Is it that this is still a 'taboo' area of sexuality where those that practice it are still afraid of the negative reaction caused if they admit to it or support it? You can be gay, bi, transgender, psychologically dominant to alarming degrees, but having 'sex on the side' is still outside the pale?

    Just a thought.

    all of which the person you love would know about. I'm all for open relationships, if you need sex outside of a relationship then cool, but only if your OH knows or is in agreement.

    cheating is just plain fucking wrong.

    So is the only way through acknowledged open-status relationships? Suppose a person had a number of lovers, none of whom had been told they had exclusive access?

    Would it make any significant difference if that was on a 'professional' basis?

    Does the response that 'cheating is plain wrong' actually reflect the fact that the author actually does not want anyone cheating on them, and extends that outward as an automatic objective truth?

    If someone has 'sworn' or promised or similar to be faithful, I can see that a promise has been broken and there is a 'wrongness' arising from that. Yet some people profess enduring commitment which does not seem to gel well with the number of broken relationship and serial partnerships prevalent in our society. Perhaps we should be more careful with what we promise and what we expect to be promised? Or are we happier being idealistic?

    1375171192
    MrsMcX [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1949
    • Joined: 15 Feb 2013

    When you're married to someone, have children with someone, and you're having sex with someone else while your husband is in a hospital bed and it none the wiser. Yes, that's wrong. I wouldn't say it was happier being idealistic, I would say its being a decent person.

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.