• Never had a orgasm? :(

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    LoveMyBaby777 [sign in to see picture]
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    My toy hasn't come yet but hoping it'll help hopefully I orded but been masturbating for years and I have NEVER had a orgasm :( I'm 24 years old and starting to feel something is wrong with me. Most of my friends talk about how amazing they are etc

    Is it common for some women to struggle or to never have one? I tend to get really close and for some reason, the whole feeling will just vanish :( can't even orgasm with my boyfriend which makes him think he's not doing his job right.

    1373756414
    blonde vixen13 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
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    I lost my virginity at 17 and never had an orgasam till I was 23. Then after that guy it took another year until I had one again. Toys, masterbation.... Nothing worked. and the longer i went without one the more i went in search of the big O . i kept putting pressure in myself and that made it even worse, i stopped
    enjoying sex I used to pretend I was having then so guys wouldn't think I was weird
    . Since I meet my current partner I have them every time we have sex. It wasn't till I meet someone that I could fully relax with until I finally realised what it was like to enjoy sex x x

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    Hampshire Hogg [sign in to see picture]
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    I am a man, but in my experience the secret is down to being able to totally trust your partner so that to can truly relax with them then it will happen.

    Don't worry relax!

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    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
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    I did not have my first orgams until i was 23, and then it took me forever to actually had one, like an hour plus. Was frustrating. So I can very well understand you.

    My personal advise would be to try to relax. And do not focus on orgasm, but enjoy the play, enjoy playing fantasies in your head. I personally found easier to orgasm during masturbation in the beginning, compared to with partner. It did happen with partner after a bit of practise, but it did not happen immediately.

    My first orgasm was with a toy, the Lovehoney Ladyfinger. Up to date I have to say I did not have an orgasm yet with just my fingers. I can orgasm by rubbing my clitoris with a dildo, mainly the Njoy dildo, or switched off vibe, or when my partner stimulates me, but no, I cannot orgasm from my own fingers. I can get pleasure, but I cannot get over the edge. I think its because I do not react as strong to my own fingers.

    So experimenting with toy can be a good way to go round it. If one toy does not work for you, it is not the end, as I met toys which did not make me orgasm, ever, although I used them many times and other people loved them. So it does take some experiments to get there, but it was worth it.

    You can also try orgasm boosters, which LH sells. They make you more sensitive and more likely to orgasm. I sometimes use them still when I bit struggle.

    I find that the more I orgasmed, the easier it got and I rarely struggle now.That is most likely a good news for you.

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    Naked_butler [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 25 Apr 2011

    Lots of women struggle with this

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    rubysoho [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
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    • Joined: 6 Mar 2013

    i can orgasm, but not through penetrartion . im starting to think ive also NOT GOT A GSPOT ! ive been sent two fab gspot vibes from lh and i just cant find the damn thing :'(

    1373830995
    Khaleesi [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
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    • Joined: 1 Jun 2012

    Laveila wrote:

    My personal advise would be to try to relax. And do not focus on orgasm, but enjoy the play, enjoy playing fantasies in your head. I personally found easier to orgasm during masturbation in the beginning, compared to with partner. It did happen with partner after a bit of practise, but it did not happen immediately.

    My first orgasm was with a toy, the Lovehoney Ladyfinger. Up to date I have to say I did not have an orgasm yet with just my fingers. I can orgasm by rubbing my clitoris with a dildo, mainly the Njoy dildo, or switched off vibe, or when my partner stimulates me, but no, I cannot orgasm from my own fingers. I can get pleasure, but I cannot get over the edge. I think its because I do not react as strong to my own fingers.

    So experimenting with toy can be a good way to go round it. If one toy does not work for you, it is not the end, as I met toys which did not make me orgasm, ever, although I used them many times and other people loved them. So it does take some experiments to get there, but it was worth it.

    You can also try orgasm boosters, which LH sells. They make you more sensitive and more likely to orgasm. I sometimes use them still when I bit struggle.

    I find that the more I orgasmed, the easier it got and I rarely struggle now.That is most likely a good news for you.

    I think the above advice is excellent.

    Easier said than done, but try and relax and not to see it as an end goal. Have some alone time without your partner and take it slowly. There are a few books out there too on female masturbation- I know it sounds silly but some people just don't know what works for them so these books help them figure it out. I can highly recomend the Tracey Cox range.

    Out of interest what toy did you oder? Xx

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    Long Time Cumiing [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
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    • Joined: 16 Jun 2013

    My OH has never masturbated and had never experienced an orgasm prior to our relationship.

    Early on I thought she should automatically know what an orgasm is, but she doesn't. She's never been able to define the orgasmic part of sex, or the peak of the pleasure so to speak.

    Nowadays I have learnt to know when she comes, tell from her moans or body shaking etc when she's 'peaking'. She's lucky enough to be able to orgasm through clitoral play ( as most women can ), penetrative play and solely breast play ( i understand this is relatively rare ). Maybe this is me being good as appose to her being lucky ;)

    rubysoho wrote:

    i can orgasm, but not through penetrartion . im starting to think ive also NOT GOT A GSPOT ! ive been sent two fab gspot vibes from lh and i just cant find the damn thing :'(

    My OH can't find her g-spot either, she's never been in to masturbation, even when I've asked her to etc. She's had her moments but she also struggles with finding her clitoris. I've had times when I've been domming her and have placed her fingers on her clitoris or positioned a vibrator on her g-spot and moved it slowly, just pleasuring those spots or teaching her how to pleasure them some what.

    I used to have issues wondering whether she had orgasmed or not - I had the idea of trying to make her squirt ( for me that was the definitive proof of a female orgasm, although not all women can or know how to do it...that's a different story ) but never did, I just learned to listen to and notice her bodily reactions to know how she's feeling.

    J

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