• What is the best way to start talking to a women you've never seen before?

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    JBigDog [sign in to see picture]
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    Don't won't to use the words "chat up lines", but what is genuinely a good way to start a conversation with someone new?

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    mrs average [sign in to see picture]
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    A genuine compliment is good conversation starter. May be something striking you notice about them. Eg That colour looks lovely on you, you wear it well. I just wanted to let you know, have a good day/enjoy your evening.
    Also I know eves dropping is rude but if there's a group of people talking about something that you have knowlege about or an opinion on you can approach by saying, sorry I couldn't help overhearing but I agree/ dissagree with you on that because...
    It might not work but I think if there's someone you really want to get to know better they'll be an opportunity to break the ice in a very natural way.

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    mrs average [sign in to see picture]
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    Oh I think a genuine compliment is nice. Anyway theMightyBum what would you suggest as a conversation starter?

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    the_drew [sign in to see picture]
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    "Hi, my name is XYZ, what's your name?"

    99% of girls will (sheepishly) reply with their name at this point. Let's say she's called Amanda...

    "Hi Amanda, nice to meet you, may I sit down here (points to seat next to Amanda) / join you / would you and your friends care to join us (point to your table with your friends (only do this if there's other girls in your group)"

    Some variation on those lines.

    If she says no to any of your comments, be respectful, wish her a pleasant evening and leave her alone.

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    At the other end of the scale I had a work mate who wanted to buy a Harley Davidson so he could say "would the keys to my Harley fit in your purse" complete tosser couldnt even ride a bicycle.

    In my opinion any "line" that is premeditated comes out wrong and sounds like a chat up line.......it all depends on the situation and her demeanour.

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    rubysoho [sign in to see picture]
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    id avoid compliments IMO as a lot of the time women really dont feel comfortable taking compliments at the best of times let alone from a stranger . hi .. i'm (insert name here) and the rest of what drew said above seems like a good starting point

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    Lovehoney - Jess Wilde [sign in to see picture]
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    I think this is really subjective to the situation you're in. For example, you would talk to a woman at work completely differently to someone in a night club.

    I truely believe in not over complicating things. Just be relaxed, honest and mention the first thing that comes to your mind (within reason!!). It's usually the most believable thing, so don't worry about being repetitive or thinking "everyone probably says that to her". (I always have people strike up conversation by commenting on the colour of my hair or my tattoos. Every time. But I never get bored of it because the person is different each time and the conversation always takes a different path, and it's nice to talk!)

    I also think it's wise to offer some information about yourself either before or very quickly after asking a question. It justifies the question and makes her feel less "on the spot".
    For example, "May I ask where you got your coat / top / shoes from? I really think my sister / friend would like something similar!"

    It gives reason to ask the question, demonstrates that you don't have a girlfriend (probably) and shows that you think about others. Also your question isn't for personal gain (eg: getting in her pants) so she's more likely to answer you in a relaxed fashion.

    Then you can go on to say "Well you really pull off that colour! Could I sit with you?".

    If and when you do ask a question, make sure it's an open question that can't be answered with a simple "yes" or "no". If she wants to be difficult and give you a one word answer you'll be left hanging! So make sure it can be elaborated on, or you are comfortable enough to continue a conversation on that subject.

    If all else fails, talk about something typical like the weather / news / traffic.... anything!! Girls know just as well as guys how hard it can be to strike up a conversation, so don't panic about being "boring". The fact you've walked over and actually spoken to us is enough to make you stand out from the crowd.

    Once you've got us listening, conversation should progress naturally. If it doesn't, then maybe she isn't the one for you after all.

    Good luck!!

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    rubysoho [sign in to see picture]
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    Lovehoney - Jess wrote:

    (I always have people strike up conversation by commenting on the colour of my hair or my tattoos. Every time. But I never get bored of it because the person is different each time and the conversation always takes a different path, and it's nice to talk!)

    really ? NEVER ? lol , i get soooo bored of '' what are you going to do when youre 70 ? '' and '' why did you tattoo your FACE ? youre ruined for life now ??!'' ummm cheers lol .

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    lol Jess ....I would never comment on your tattoos (or anyone elses).....its so "obvious"

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    sexynurse09 [sign in to see picture]
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    I like it when people comment on my tattoos, they've served as a good ice breaker a few times now.

    Totally agree though Rubysoho, gets on my nerves when people say 'ooh what will you look like when you're old...' Blah blah blah. Um...kinda like this but grey n wrinkly? I just smile sweetly and say 'oh you think I've finished? I'll have far more than this when I'm old and ill be proud of them too.' Either that or I just tell them that none of us know what's around the next corner and if I get to 70 and my tattoos are wrinkly so what? I'll just consider myself lucky to have made it that far.

    In response to the original question, if someone wanted to talk to me ( a stranger) I think I'd rather they were just honest and upfront. No chat up lines. I really like Jess's post, sums up what I think.

    By the way, Jess I love your hair colour and would love to have mine a bold colour like that but work won't like it :-(.

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    FrozenAngel [sign in to see picture]
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    Again like other people have said it does just depend on the situation. And the girl themselves. I myself hate chat up lines, and would much rather someone come up and introduce themselves and chat about anything.

    I hate the compliments straight off the bat too, it makes me feel umcomfotable and I find myself looking for the nearest exit! But that's just me.

    I also don't mind it when people talk about my tattoo's and peircings, so long as they're not being rude, otherwise I'd tell them where to stick their opinion.

    I have to agree with you SN09 I loveee Jess's hair colour!

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    Lovehoney - Jess Wilde [sign in to see picture]
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    rubysoho wrote:

    Lovehoney - Jess wrote:

    (I always have people strike up conversation by commenting on the colour of my hair or my tattoos. Every time. But I never get bored of it because the person is different each time and the conversation always takes a different path, and it's nice to talk!)

    really ? NEVER ? lol , i get soooo bored of '' what are you going to do when youre 70 ? '' and '' why did you tattoo your FACE ? youre ruined for life now ??!'' ummm cheers lol .

    Haha oh yeah, don't get me wrong, there are the usual things of "what are you going to do when your 80?" or even worse, people who just come up and start touching your tattoos.... I mean... what the hell?!?! It's my freaking skin!!! lol.

    But if someone asks me where I had them done or want to know more about them then I love to stop and chat. I'd much prefer to chat to someone new, than not talk to anyone! (Plus I carry business cards for my tattooists so I look really organised when someone stops me :P)

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    rubysoho [sign in to see picture]
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    Lovehoney - Jess wrote:

    rubysoho wrote:

    Lovehoney - Jess wrote:

    (I always have people strike up conversation by commenting on the colour of my hair or my tattoos. Every time. But I never get bored of it because the person is different each time and the conversation always takes a different path, and it's nice to talk!)

    really ? NEVER ? lol , i get soooo bored of '' what are you going to do when youre 70 ? '' and '' why did you tattoo your FACE ? youre ruined for life now ??!'' ummm cheers lol .

    Haha oh yeah, don't get me wrong, there are the usual things of "what are you going to do when your 80?" or even worse, people who just come up and start touching your tattoos.... I mean... what the hell?!?! It's my freaking skin!!! lol.

    But if someone asks me where I had them done or want to know more about them then I love to stop and chat. I'd much prefer to chat to someone new, than not talk to anyone! (Plus I carry business cards for my tattooists so I look really organised when someone stops me :P)

    yeah the gropers make me feel like HULK . theyre not in braille dude , no need to grab my boob . none !!!

    genuine questions are always nice , i dont mind that one bit , but the amount of utter D*CKS you get sometimes coming up '' i dont think women should have tattoos '' uhgggh .. id love to just respond with ok . i dont think you should be allowed to breed , as youre clearly a moron lol

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    Old - But not THAT old! [sign in to see picture]
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    What a great topic. Wish the Lovehoney Forum had been around when I was a young lad "out on the pull" - I never did know what to say :-(

    In those days I just used to follow my older friend who seemed to have all the right chat-up lines. You older members will know how it goes - 2 girls dancing on the disco floor around their handbags, Mr Smooth approaches the one he fancies who is drop-dead-gorgeous, gives his chat-up line and the girl accepts a dance with him. This leaves her friend (who was usually not so good looking - she hung around with her gorgeous friend to make sure she could get a bloke) with nobody to dance with, so by default Mr Not-So-Smooth (ME) is now dancing with her without having to say anything. Mind you, it always ended the same - after one dance it was "Thank You" as she picked up her handbag and headed for the loos, leaving me to go home on my own whilst Mr Smooth was off with the other girl for a night of Passion.

    I'm afraid my best chat-up line never extended beyond "Do you come here often?" -sic :-(

    Needless to say I didn't meet Mrs Old at a Disco!

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    Mr Tall [sign in to see picture]
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    fat penguins are good ice breakers--

    sorry --il'e get me coat

    T

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    GymJunki3 [sign in to see picture]
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    Also, it's as much about body language and how you approach her. If your body language is not congruent with what you're saying it can appear awkward and she won't relax.

    So make sure you don't talk too quickly, slooowww down, don't be overly animated (weird hand movements etc lol). If you go over relaxed and confident (smiling isn't a bad thing either) she'll more likely to respond in a positive way.

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    Lovehoney - Rachel [sign in to see picture]
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    Location makes a big difference. I have been asked out or chatted up by a lot of guys in the street, on the Tube and at railway stations and always found it rather creepy. One guy said he drove past me most days and this time parked his car and crossed the road to talk to me while another walked past me on Chiswick High Street, did a U-turn and chatted me up when I was on my way back from the shop. I even had one guy try to chat me up hen I was walking with my BF and his mate. I think thats why I now walk around with a scowl on my face.

    I guess my point is try not to seem too enthusiastic at first meeting and try not to do it in weird places where the recipient of your affections may be on her guard.

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    Lovehoney - Rachel [sign in to see picture]
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    Just when I thought I was loosing my touch, I was almost home from my 13 mile cycle home from Lovehoney, particularly sweaty and wearing my size 20 Lycra lout cycling leggings and some guy a few metres behind me started shouting at me from down the street throwing compliments at me while holding his mobile to his face. Not a good move even if I was single.

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    FrozenAngel [sign in to see picture]
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    Lovehoney - Rachel wrote:

    Just when I thought I was loosing my touch, I was almost home from my 13 mile cycle home from Lovehoney, particularly sweaty and wearing my size 20 Lycra lout cycling leggings and some guy a few metres behind me started shouting at me from down the street throwing compliments at me while holding his mobile to his face. Not a good move even if I was single.

    Oh dear!

    I also get a little bit parranoid about people holding their mobiles up whilst talking to you, with all the cameras and video recordings on them now.

    I had a guy at a bus station staring at my boobs from across the platform (If they're called platforms in bus stations) with his camera up, however he was called out by my 5yr old son, he eventually left with his tail between his legs and a lot of head shaking from the older generation.

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    Lovehoney - Rachel [sign in to see picture]
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    FrozenAngel wrote:

    Lovehoney - Rachel wrote:

    Just when I thought I was loosing my touch, I was almost home from my 13 mile cycle home from Lovehoney, particularly sweaty and wearing my size 20 Lycra lout cycling leggings and some guy a few metres behind me started shouting at me from down the street throwing compliments at me while holding his mobile to his face. Not a good move even if I was single.

    Oh dear!

    I also get a little bit parranoid about people holding their mobiles up whilst talking to you, with all the cameras and video recordings on them now.

    I had a guy at a bus station staring at my boobs from across the platform (If they're called platforms in bus stations) with his camera up, however he was called out by my 5yr old son, he eventually left with his tail between his legs and a lot of head shaking from the older generation.

    That's eally creepy.

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