HELP! - My girlfriend says I cant use a vibrator on/in her when...

she gives me a blow job!

I really wanted her to use the mounted vibrator dildo in various positions while giving me a blowjob. When I mentioned it to her tonight (its my birthday on friday) she said "No way is something disgusting like that going inside me!".

We used a vibrator on her clit last night during sex and she liked it but she says she dosent want any in her. Especially doing something like her backing onto or mounting a vibrator with a suction cup.

This idea really appeals to me and I really want to get her into it.

Has anyone had a similar experiance to this where you had to warm your partner up to something new?

Any hints of how I could build up to something like that?

 If she doesn't want to, then she doesn't want to.  I think she's likely to get less confident if you push it.  If you let it go, she may return to the idea on her own.  Consent is mandatory.  :)

As a personal opinion, I'd recommend letting her get on with fellating you undistracted.  If she's distracted, you never know what might happen.  :p

I think the only posts you've made are about stuff your girlfriend doesn't want to do..

I don't know how old she is, but maybe you should leave it for a while. Constantly being pushed for more, different, kinkier is unlikely to make her more enthusiastic about sex.

I thought I would be better asking for advice on here rather than pestering her.

I think I will start with vibes for the clit and then work her up to it. I want to get her using these things on her own and then hopefully during sex she will eventually become more open to the use of different toys.

Buy her something small like a bullet vibe, & leave it in a conspicious place when you go out. If you leave her alone with it, you never know, she might experiment with it ;O) x If not, hide it, then text her to look for something 'on the bookcase' or wherever...and leave her at that.

I did that with my Other Half, but with a little 'Alice in Wonderland' type tag on it, saying 'Play with Me' :D

Did the trick ;O) x

 That's a great idea Lava.  I think I'd be inclined to give her a really classy looking vibe (not too big) as a present and then leave it up to her to try it out if she wants to.  (Personally I'm obsessed with glass dildos - they feel just gorgeous and look so classy.  You can introduced them as a massage tool rather than dildo). 

This is actually very tricky.

• If I bring it up out the blue she wont be up  for it.
• If I try it during sex when we are deep in the moment I might just start ruining the moment
• If I try it before sex it might ruin her mood

That could be a bad pattern.

Horny Pony wrote:

 That's a great idea Lava.  I think I'd be inclined to give her a really classy looking vibe (not too big) as a present and then leave it up to her to try it out if she wants to.  (Personally I'm obsessed with glass dildos - they feel just gorgeous and look so classy.  You can introduced them as a massage tool rather than dildo). 

yeah cool idea :) Mmmm glass dildos, that could work :D x

Or, just one of those massage machines actually designed to massage, make her relaxed, stroke her back with it, tummy, thights and oops! Accidently slip.... :D

She has done things in the past when we were drunk and were having some really intense sex that she would not even consider ever doing now.

Its strange but she has to be in the right mood at the right time for new stuff. We have been with each other for over seven years so I think I just have to bring her round over time.

Thanks for the opinions ladies. I will keep the advice in mind.

You do make a lot of posts about what your girlfriend won't do.

Yeah give the girl a break or she may not be your girlfriend in the future.

There's encouragement and some great ideas above, but then there's pestering and you're running too close to the line.  Why can't you just enjoy the sex you do have and allow her to explore her boundaries in her own time?

imeldaimelda wrote:

Yeah give the girl a break or she may not be your girlfriend in the future.

completely agree, don't pester her - will you really get off on something when you know shes not interested in it?

Oh dear skilgannon the girls on your case...but they are offering sound advice, if i were you i'd just be happy with the sex.

skilgannon wrote:

I thought I would be better asking for advice on here rather than pestering her.

There are some good bits of advice on here, but as people say if its going to happen it will take a while and should be done while staying in her bounderies

Aw, come on guys I already said that at 9:42 pm above.

Guys...I'm sure he wont do anything against her consent....surely that goes without saying!

Skil....how about a little bit of compromise....is there anything (sexual or not) that she really wants you to do that you're not too keen on? You can always agree to doing that if she does this for you?

That could be an option you're both happy with and might open you both up to new ideas?!

Obviously, respect is paramount, but good luck!

Thanks Strapon,

I have seen some of your posts and it looks like you are a good bit more adventurous than me (which I would assume from your username anyway). And I wouldnt do anything without her consent as you said so thanks for pointing that out.

She usually says "If you want me to do it you do it first" which shuts me up pretty quickly.

And Besty: are those real horns?

Also,

Strapon, is that your Mrs in your avi? I saw you said thats from a video she sent you. Do you work away or something?

Well we don't live together anyway, so I'm always away!

If you're not adventurous...then you can't blame the Mrs! Also, maybe she wants to stay nice and tight down there so doesn't wna put anythin apart from you in there? If so, she's got your best interests at heart!

Thanks, I think buying a bunch of stuff on this website has put to many ideas in my head.