• Spark in a relationship

    1357162872
    Ilovemyman [sign in to see picture]
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    Its hard to do, i'm not feeling great about my self at the moment, i'm carrying extra weight that i haven't been able to shift since having my 3rd baby and it is hard to beleive my husband when he says i'm sexy and he isn't bothered about it. Women are so complicated x

    1357163335
    milf lover [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
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    • Joined: 28 May 2007

    Oh yes complicated you all are. My wife has had 4 kids. One of them is mine but i treat the others like my own. We haven't had the easiest of times. I find her very sexy and attractive even tho she thinks she isn't. She didn't like the underwear i bought her. She didn't like me looking on LH website as she thought i was serving at the models. Does that sound familiar.

    1357169763
    choclover [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
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    • Joined: 27 Oct 2012

    I'm having similar problems with my husband. He thinks I want sex everynight and sometimes I do :D, because I want to talk about it all the time and the only reason I do that is so I know what he likes and he knows what I like (by the way this has been since fifty shades).

    He told me a few months ago that he wanted to be tied up, so i bought some bondage tape and he loved it, but when I asked him to do the same to me he said he wouldn't! I'd love him to dominate me and not just with tying me up but more in the mind, if you know what I mean. I don't think he understands it all that well and when I start talking to him about it he just shuts off. But it's the other, smaller things too not just the sex. He doesn't tell me he loves me as often as he used to, even just a year ago. Doesn't really kiss or touch me apart from when we make love - I pulled him up on it before christmas and it got better but now it seems forgotten. Like another poster put (i think it was ilovemyman), we sit on separate sofas - me either on the laptop or reading a book and him either watching tv or on his xbox, in the same room not really talking to each other. It's extremely difficult when you've got kids too, our 3 year old is all out of her sleeping pattern at the moment so 9 times out of 10 she comes to bed with us, so talking properly just doesn't seem to happen.

    Even coming on this website in the past has raised suspicions with him as he thinks its a bad influence on me.

    We've had a couple of good discussions about it over the past few days talking about how I'm feeling, what we want to achieve out of life, things we want to do etc. I told him I didn't want our relationship to be based around household chores etc as most of our arguements are about housework or money. It seems to have cleared the air a bit and I feel a lot happier about things now than I did.

    My advice would be to take stock of things and look at the whole picture, are you being as romantic, caring and supportive as you can be in all aspects of her life? Also talk to her - tell her how you feel and ask her how she feels and if she still loves you. It's a horrible position to be in, I know, but just be honest.

    1357250071
    milf lover [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
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    • Joined: 28 May 2007

    Similar situation. I tell her i love her at least twice a day. She replys oh good.
    She doesn't ever kiss me.

    Will try talking to her and see where it leads.
    Cheers

    P.s. She thinks i come on LH to perv at the women. So it has caused friction too

    1357250723
    choclover [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
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    milf lover wrote:

    P.s. She thinks i come on LH to perv at the women. So it has caused friction too

    That's a shame, I've never felt perved upon on here and in a way I think it helps as I don't want to talk about this kind of stuff to my friends and you always need someone other than the OH to sound board off from.

    1357250932
    Love my slave [sign in to see picture]
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    Hi Milf lover me and my hubby have been together 10 1/2 years and married 8 1/2 years after 2 kids the spark was well gone, I couldn't be bothered with sex much at all not that I didn't enjoy it just couldn't be bothered after work and kids taking up all my time.
    Then one evening hubby decided to blind fold me well it's gone from nothing to all the time, I'm the slave and I can be anybody once that blind fold is on I feel great.
    I just needed to find something to reignite the spark.
    Yes it happens to everyone you just need to find out what it is. My hubby makes all the effort and that's selfish I know but it works for us.
    I'm not a choccies and flowers kinda girl I'm more spanking and slavery kinda girl.
    Sorry I'm waffling on here first time I've posted :)
    Good luck.

    1357251023
    Love my slave [sign in to see picture]
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    It was my OH that started on love honey he's got loads of advice from men and women its ok we both look together why not involve her in looking getting excited together.

    1357251572
    milf lover [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
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    I did suggest blinfoldin her but she wasn't interested. She's a plan Jane girl.
    May suggest this to her one day when time is right

    1357251903
    Love my slave [sign in to see picture]
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    I would suggest getting a silk nice scarf something that feels nice and when your getting a bit frisky and she's turned on just try it, you never know sometimes we don't like the sound of something but when we try it well it's sometimes good :)

    1357566582
    Jimi Duro [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
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    • Joined: 5 Apr 2012

    A spark can be rekindled but its how you get it back I left my ex because the spark had completely gone

    1357595318
    mrs average [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 18 Oct 2012

    All relationships have their good and bad seasons especially if children are involved.

    1357645384
    kinky str8 [sign in to see picture]
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    It sounds like you really love her and want this to work. If it is meant to be you will both find a way. Hope it all works out.

    1357850775
    CharlieTheDog [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
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    • Joined: 25 Dec 2012

    Hey MilfLover.

    Sorry to hear you're having problems. Any luck since the last post?

    I'm replying here as I feel the spark has gone from my relationship too. We still tell each other "I love you" everyday, but the majority of the time it's him saying it, and me saying "love you too". We still have sex, but no where near as often as we used to- probably about once or twice a month now.

    I've been thinking of breaking up with him but I just don't think I can do it. It would be kind of unexpected for him, even though we have had a talk about how we just seem bored with each other recently. I love him, I really do, but things are just so stale. We hardly ever talk and when we are together, we are just bored. I want to leave but I know it will hurt him, and I know I would miss him too. I just don't know what to do.

    Hope you work things out, ML. x

    1357904645
    Love my slave [sign in to see picture]
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    Hi charlieTheDog

    It sounds like you don't want to end it but your fed up, we all go thought times in our relationships where you just think oh I can't be bothered it would be easier to split, in our marriage we have done the same but we sat down and talked realised yes of course we still love each other decided to make more time for each other and now we are getting on really well and have been having great sex to we have rekindled the spark with new toys hang on in there.

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