• Long Distance

    1354704099
    Hoebag [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 79
    • Joined: 14 Apr 2012

    I usually cannot handle a long-distance relationship, I don't enjoy not being able to spend anytime with a partner short-notice, on a whim. I find it incredibly frustrating as I have such a high sex drive going weeks between each visit. The only longterm relationship I was comfortable with was because I had such a high level of interest in and feelings for the guy from the beginning, progressed from friendship and there was alot of discussion and openness about where we wanted the relationship to go because we even considered anything more than friendship. The aim was long distance was temporary, which suited us both and neither of us wanted an indefinite LDR with a distance of 422miles and £110 just for the trainfare alone (we're paupers) to spend some time together.

    I don't think I'd ever do it again tbh, it put so much strain on the relationship from the beginning. There was alot of worries both sides, and had it not been someone I was already so close to, I don't think I would of considered it. I'd feel too lonely day to day.

    1354750399
    Thingamee [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 36
    • Joined: 23 Sep 2010

    I'm in one, 170 miles, we share travelling and therefore costs, sometimes it's a hotel, sometimes it's my place or hers, when we see each other it's incredible. We txt every day, we chat every couple of days, but don't see each other enough. We actually met through Facebook and it wasn't supposed to turn into a real relationship but it has and I'm so greatful, she's wonderful. My only down side is that if I need a cuddle or kiss I can't get one NOW, as others have said in this thread.

    If you want to make it work you will and can. Mobiles with cameras are fun, pictures can be taken and sent at any time of the day or night in any situation and can bring a surpirise and a smile to the recipient. The first sentence of a norty story can be sent and the recipient can reply with the second and so on, make it a story you want to enact at the next meeting if you wish, Lovehoney can send gifts from you to them, especially if they have a wish list, they may not even realise its from you.

    (PS: Mine was only supposed to be a NSA FB thing, but it's got serious, and I'm so glad it has).

    1354754078
    c00kie [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 163
    • Joined: 31 Aug 2012

    i used to be in a long distance relationship about 3 years ago. The distance was roughly 282 miles. It didn't last long, only 9 months. And we found it very difficult. We saw each other about every 2-3 months for a week, occasionally 2. It got "serious" very quickly which put more pressure on us for it to work out.
    it cost a lot by train to see each other which was another downfall of our relationship.

    I've also had another, which was about 2 years ago now. It wasn't the biggest of distances at only 30-40 miles but he lived in the middle of no-where. neither of us drived. and the closest train station from his was about 10 miles away. and no busses went straight to his either. So it was very difficult to see each other. That relionship only lasted about 2-3 months.

    Its very hard not to see the person you care for, for long times. i mean video chat is nice but not the same than being with that person. for me, it makes me miss them even more.

    I've heard stories where long distance relationships works (not anyone i personally know) but that tends to be because someone moves away closer to their OH and leaves their home town. Or they move in together between their home towns. so either one or both move away from their families and freinds to be with the person they love. Some people aren't willing to do that. which will cause problems in the relationship. My first long distance Boyfriend talked about moving down with me, but i felt guilty because it meant he'd move away from everything and everyone he knew. And that the last straw for him and broke things off between us. As i was in a very foul mood one night and stated it was a "stupid idea"

    My advice would be to enjoy the now but also think about the future with this person, if things gets serious you both need to be on the same page as what you are going to do.

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