• Have you ever had a problem finishing?

    1353204582
    ksw1980 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 141
    • Joined: 24 Aug 2008

    Hi, my problem is that mentally I seem unable to cum despite the best efforts of my OH to get me there and some energetic sex for us two! We've got to the stage where penetrative sex is not the be all and end all, and let our fingers do the talking more than we used to do. But, I still don't know why I can't finish inside her and I think it makes her feel a bit guilty too. We're both very concious about our bodies (we both need to lose weight) and this doesn't help as it makes her feel I don't find her attractive enough when I really do!

    Don't know if anyone has any ideas, more just getting it off my chest.

    1353205019
    sexywelshlady [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 46
    • Joined: 30 May 2011

    Dont let that bother you, I love oral sex get more out of oral sex than doing the real biz, love toys , love massage,nipple play turns me on more than anything, love oral, penatration is ok but get turned on more by the others its up to you both to find a happy medium but dont get hang ups because you dont find full penatration as over the moon as you think you should, it dont float everyones boat

    1353206883
    Shy guy [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 18
    • Joined: 1 Jul 2012

    KSW - this is going to be obvious for some, but stressing about it just add pressure and means it doesnt happen even more! Which then becomes a circle.

    I usually have this problem when im extremely drunk, its great I can go all night! but other than that yes I have had a few occassions were im not able to produce. Usually when the OH has given her best!!!!!

    As for body shapes, I can understand me and the OH love doggy, but I always find it hard to get in....she says her large behind gets in the way, I say my angle and tummy makes it difficult.

    Please dont stress, chat to your OH and try and work it out togther. Good luck!

    1353243315
    la83 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 120
    • Joined: 4 Oct 2012

    We have that problem too, I can feel when he is nearly there but he cannot always get there. If he is getting near he pulls out, plays with it a bit pops it back in and hopefully that gets it, took two goes this morning but it worked.

    1353246205
    ksw1980 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 141
    • Joined: 24 Aug 2008

    Thanks for the advice everyone!

    sexywelshlady - My OH loves oral (not so much giving it back!) so that won't be a problem for her. Think Shy guy hit the nail on the head, I'm making it worse by worrying about it!!! I wish I'd had this problem when I was younger :)

    I know what you mean about doggy too. I love taking her from behind, but our shapes don't allow it really. I do love my OH's behind though I don't think she believes me.

    And la83, I guess I think she'd think I was unable to cum because of her if I had a play. Maybe I should ask her to do that and then pounce on her again lol Glad it worked for you this morning.

    Hopefully I stop stressing soon. :)

    1353252997
    la83 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 120
    • Joined: 4 Oct 2012

    Well, hubby used to just pull out and leave it at that, well still does depending on how things are going but I had read somewhere to do that and it will hopefully, eventually sort things out. But we did talk about it together, after I got upset because I thought he didn't want me. hope things sort out for you.

    1353293984
    ksw1980 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 141
    • Joined: 24 Aug 2008

    la83 wrote:

    Well, hubby used to just pull out and leave it at that, well still does depending on how things are going but I had read somewhere to do that and it will hopefully, eventually sort things out. But we did talk about it together, after I got upset because I thought he didn't want me. hope things sort out for you.

    That's usually how things end with us. We're both too knackered to do anything else and I always feel wrong playing with myself in front of my OH. No idea why! Sounds very similar to what we're going through so it's good to know others have got through it! :)

    1353305069
    la83 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 120
    • Joined: 4 Oct 2012

    I used to feel wrong playing with myself in front of hubby, but I do it sometimes, if he doesn't help, suppose you get used to it. It never seemed to bother him playing.

    If hubby is too knackered to carry on he plays with himself, I just cannot get him to cum, well managed once but he had to play with himself first till he was almost there, then I gave him oral and it worked. To top it all he was noisy, it was so erotic to hear him, first time in 29yr. Will have to try that again

    I also find if he kneels between my legs, when he is playing, I find that a big turn on. I would prefer it inside but, over can be just as good.

    Hope it helps.:-)

    1353454032
    ksw1980 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 141
    • Joined: 24 Aug 2008

    la83 wrote:

    I used to feel wrong playing with myself in front of hubby, but I do it sometimes, if he doesn't help, suppose you get used to it. It never seemed to bother him playing.

    If hubby is too knackered to carry on he plays with himself, I just cannot get him to cum, well managed once but he had to play with himself first till he was almost there, then I gave him oral and it worked. To top it all he was noisy, it was so erotic to hear him, first time in 29yr. Will have to try that again

    I also find if he kneels between my legs, when he is playing, I find that a big turn on. I would prefer it inside but, over can be just as good.

    Hope it helps.:-)

    I'm glad that worked for you...sounds like you had more than fun! You know you're doing it write when your partner is noisy lol

    My OH doesn't like it over her, too much mess, but it does work for me...might have to try when we're away on our break and she's drunk. :)

    1353454404
    ksw1980 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 141
    • Joined: 24 Aug 2008

    Oops. Double post.

    But, thanks for everyones replies to this thread. Hopefully it is of some help! :)

    1353618448
    Janny [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 679
    • Joined: 17 May 2011

    Think it happens to everyone sometimes. Remember this really nice girl and the sex was great but just couldn't get there, but when she did I thought I'd got away with it. Which I hadn't obviously, and then we both felt really bad. We could laugh about it in the morning tho and then I could actually, as she called it, 'shoot' haha

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.