Dom/Sub rules

This is going to be a long post but I want a bit of advice. The Wife and I has now set up rules according to some of our kinks for us to swap the submissive and dominant one. Please Give me your thoughts and also what rules you may have.

 Could you tell a bit more, like which kinks you want the rules to be based around? And is it going to be just in the bedroom, or during everyday life as well? 

1. Pineapple = stop, Penguin = tread carefully

2. A weekend consists of Friday to Sunday, starting on the Friday after work

3. Mrs will have one weekend a month with at least 24 hrs. notice

4. Mrs can ask to change her weekend to a different weekend if reason is given

Rules for Mr

1. No forced bum play

2. Must make main decisions for the day I.e. Where to go or what to do

3. Must not make unreasonable demands

4. Can have sex with Mrs whenever he wants as long as it doesn’t contradict any other rules or conditions from rule 1 in the general rules used

5. Has the right to ignore refusals unless one of the safe words is used

6. Will not cause physical harm or noticeable marks

7. Must not constantly ask for blowjobs or sex and do something unrelated to sexual activities during the day/weekend

8. Mr has the right to add more rules if agreed by Mrs and not to be used if agreed on a weekend

Rules for Mrs

1. Must do as Mr say when Mr says if possible and not contradicting any previous rules

2. Indication of enjoyment and consent must be expressed during ‘forced’ sex

3. Must give feedback if there is a reason Mrs does not want to do as per rule 3 from Mr

4. Must give Mr a blowjob/ hand job whenever it is asked for whenever he wants as long as it doesn’t contradict any other rules or conditions from rule 1 used

5. Has the right to refuse anything if an appropriate reason is give

6. Must always be wearing sexy underwear

7. Must wear sexy nightwear to bed unless the temperature makes it uncomfortable, This must be expressed well before bed time, Sundays not included

8. Must not ignore Mr

9. Mrs has the right to add more rules if agreed by Mr and not to be used if agreed on a weekend

I agree to follow these rules

Signed

(our names changed to mrs and mr)

cheer_up wrote:

 Could you tell a bit more, like which kinks you want the rules to be based around? And is it going to be just in the bedroom, or during everyday life as well? 

Was in the process of posting the rules! :-P

1. Pineapple = stop, Penguin = tread carefully

2. A day consists of 24hrs Starting from whenever Mrs decides

3. There will be 3 Days a month

4. Mrs does not need to give any notice but must notify Mr of the start of a day

5. Days can be at any time during the month except for Mr’s weekend

Rules for Mrs

1.Mrs  has the right to tell Mr when he is too excited and going too far but must still ‘keep the weekend going’ when Mr has ‘calmed down’

2. Can punish Mr in anyway Mrs feels fit but cannot leave any lasting damage

3. Will tease Mr is a sexual way and make him think about it and tease him in whatever way she feels fit

4. Will add extra rules when confidence increases and limits that Mrs is prepared to do is discovered, This does not have to be agreed by Mr but Mr has the right to remove them if a reason is given. These new rules can be used whenever they are thought up

Rules for Mr

1. If Mr talks about Mrs’s Day, Mrs has the right to cancel one unless it comes up in general conversation or Mrs brings it up/ asks a question about it

2. Mr must put on ladies knickers when he is told it is Mrs's day but MUST NOT wear them at any other time unless during his weekend

3. Must do exactly as Mrs say unless contradicting any other rule

4. Can only cum when given permission by Mrs, If close to Cumming Mr must tell Mrs and ruin the orgasm if required

5. Mr has the right to add more rules if agreed by Mrs and not to be used if agreed on a weekend

I agree to follow these rules

Signed

(noticed a lot of typos there so i will need to redo it somtime but for now i hope it is a good start)

Wow. They seem very complicated rules with too many get out clauses.

I'd just have a safe word. Anything else goes. .

My favourite rule is  "Must not constantly ask for blow jobs..."  Tickles me that one

I wonder who contributed that rule?

There are so many get out clauses because i get a bit over the top and i am not good enough at reading her. She is also very sensetive but wants to do this.

Also I was the one that contributed to it because i know that i can get a bit obsessed and over the top

Fair enough.

Isn't that the point though?

Going over the top is part of the thrill?

I've never been involved in it myself. But I appreciate the concept is to let go of control?

DoorGlass wrote:

Fair enough.

Isn't that the point though?

Going over the top is part of the thrill?

I've never been involved in it myself. But I appreciate the concept is to let go of control?

The problem is you could leave permant damage if your not careful 

me and my master are long distance so favorite rules are:

i must not call master on skype, i must wait for him to do so (although i can ask for him to call)

when texting/ typing/ writing i must capitalise any word refering to Master (talk in 3rd person alot) eg "his name", "You", "His" etc. when refering to myself i must not capitalise e.g "i" not "I", "my name" not "My Name"

if Master asks me to mastibate infront of him via vidio chat i must do so, weather i want to or not and can only use toys if he alows it.

in genral i must be a good sub who is both willing, pleasing, obedient and welll mannered. i must make Master proud of me and please him sexualy if he so asks.

however, rules are not set in stone (eg. if i really dont feel like sex or just want hugs i have the right to say so and be listened to) and curently being very lax about rule 1 but very serious about rule 2 (master recently got a mobile after almost a year of not having one so lots of opotunity to apply rule 2)

Ork wrote:

DoorGlass wrote:

Fair enough.

Isn't that the point though?

Going over the top is part of the thrill?

I've never been involved in it myself. But I appreciate the concept is to let go of control?

 

The problem is you could leave permant damage if your not careful 

Not if you use your safe words.

We are still very new to this and I agree with Ork but I dont mean physical damage.... especially when one of the thing she wants on my weekend is for me to have sex with her when she doesnt particualy want it!

If I am not carefull I will put her off the idea and possibly damage our relationship. Also the things that I want when she is in charge I have wanted for a long time and use to try and bug her for it.... this way she can do things in her own time and I will occasionaly get what I want.

DoorGlass wrote:

Ork wrote:

DoorGlass wrote:

Fair enough.

Isn't that the point though?

Going over the top is part of the thrill?

I've never been involved in it myself. But I appreciate the concept is to let go of control?

 

The problem is you could leave permant damage if your not careful 

Not if you use your safe words.

 My mistake I had assumed you were meaning by going over the top as in not using a safe word however feel that using one is a good idea depending on your preference of course.

One thing you could do I think is mention on here exactly what it is you are intending to do is it just domination in the form of your a sex slave or the sort of sex slave that gets punished example flogging, hot wax etc?

Personally I think you should take it rather lightly the first night of the weekend but then slowly and I mean slowly start building up really slowly if you see marks then probably stop or at lest ask her if your not great at reading I know I'm not I find talking is key to keeping them safe and also can be used for mind games lol but most importantly when you stop for that short period of say flogging to ask if there okay it provides them with a quick breather.

Even if you ask them if there okay some time's you will have to make the judgment to stop for them again say your flogging her ass it looks red ect and you think she's near breaking point that doesn't mean you need to break her consider stopping and moving on to other play hot wax electro play whatever your in to or even just flog something other than her ass watching some porn might help give you idea's of different way's of playing but don't try and replicate it exactly porn like that will probably be on the extreme side so unless your ready don't do it.

Be inventive seriously it can get boring after a while if you repeat the same old process so mix it up for example flogging again ( I love flogging) don't be predictable if you watch the porn I do you would know for example you can whip, flog and spank every part of the body for one example I see a lot (again don't do it unless your confident you can get away with it) is flogging her breasts stomach and kegs basically everything but stay away from the head and neck! An extreme example from such videos make her stand on her tip toes and whip the sole's of her feet they normally start slowly as opposed to whacking straight away.

I could go on for age's but don't want to bore you lol hope this helps but over all be careful and keep communications flowing she might not say one of the safe words but even then you are her master for that time frame in my opinion the less she need's the safe word the better this also goes a long way to building trust with this sort of play.

Lastly if you get carried away stop! You should always keep strict control of your self I know it can be hard but if she has the fear that you will get carried away then I think there would be an issue there, so if you are getting a little excited stop and communicate it's what I do because it breaks your concentration and allows you to chill a little without her ever knowing but if you get carried away then it come's back to the trust problem the more trust the more you can get off with.

I think for her weekends (she may correct me if I am wrong) she want it very light.... bit of light spanking and tieing up and yeah I guess being used as a sex slave.

I want slightly more which I think some of it wierds her out however we have duiscussed it and this is why we are going at her own pace. I want being made to feel embarrised or uncomfortable in public places (pravatly ofc) being teased and not allowed to cum for periods of time being spanked and punished for doing things wrong and made to wear butt plugs lots. She also doesnt think she has enough ideas to fill and entire weekend but i guess if she wanted to surprise me and had ideas she still could have them all together

Also Ork those are some very good tips

I would think that once we get into it if it works we can greatly cut down the rules to simmilar to rag doll's. Just terrified of getting it wrong and annoying the wife

 Oh god that's an essay sorry one mroe fast thing I found it useful to read any and all articles threads and even searching for domination blogs and stuff just to expand my knowledge there is sooooooooo much different way's to have fun 

Good luck and stay safe

Ork wrote:

 Oh god that's an essay sorry one mroe fast thing I found it useful to read any and all articles threads and even searching for domination blogs and stuff just to expand my knowledge there is sooooooooo much different way's to have fun 

Good luck and stay safe

Will have to force her to do that next time it is my weekend!

Theolain wrote:

I think for her weekends (she may correct me if I am wrong) she want it very light.... bit of light spanking and tieing up and yeah I guess being used as a sex slave.

I want slightly more which I think some of it wierds her out however we have duiscussed it and this is why we are going at her own pace. I want being made to feel embarrised or uncomfortable in public places (pravatly ofc) being teased and not allowed to cum for periods of time being spanked and punished for doing things wrong and made to wear butt plugs lots. She also doesnt think she has enough ideas to fill and entire weekend but i guess if she wanted to surprise me and had ideas she still could have them all together

Also Ork those are some very good tips

I would think that once we get into it if it works we can greatly cut down the rules to simmilar to rag doll's. Just terrified of getting it wrong and annoying the wife

 Being embarseed in public? Wear womens clothing under your normal clothes and put in a butt plug and go to the shop? Glad I could be of some use :) as for light spanking and such that's why I love floggers so much they can be harsh but also rather good for very light play and even tickling dpending on the person.

Ork wrote:

Theolain wrote:

I think for her weekends (she may correct me if I am wrong) she want it very light.... bit of light spanking and tieing up and yeah I guess being used as a sex slave.

I want slightly more which I think some of it wierds her out however we have duiscussed it and this is why we are going at her own pace. I want being made to feel embarrised or uncomfortable in public places (pravatly ofc) being teased and not allowed to cum for periods of time being spanked and punished for doing things wrong and made to wear butt plugs lots. She also doesnt think she has enough ideas to fill and entire weekend but i guess if she wanted to surprise me and had ideas she still could have them all together

Also Ork those are some very good tips

I would think that once we get into it if it works we can greatly cut down the rules to simmilar to rag doll's. Just terrified of getting it wrong and annoying the wife

 Being embarseed in public? Wear womens clothing under your normal clothes and put in a butt plug and go to the shop? Glad I could be of some use :) as for light spanking and such that's why I love floggers so much they can be harsh but also rather good for very light play and even tickling dpending on the perosn.

But I want to be forced to wear woment clothing under my normal cloths and forced to wear a butt plug

 Forced? Lol I do it voluntarily to my self lol so much more interesting

I think I want to have that in a submissve way..... and if I were to go out and do it myself I dont think it would be the same, I would need her to know and tend to not know how to mention things like that in the right way to not annoy her.