• first smear test

    1337465378
    sam86 [sign in to see picture]
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    first smear test monday,

    omg i am scared

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    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
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    Hello,

    just do not worry. I am sure it will be all right. I cannot say it is 100% comfortable. But it is managable. I understand being nervous, I was as well, when I was having my first one, but that has been about 7? years ago. I cannot remember now.

    Good luck

    1337465928
    Nymeria [sign in to see picture]
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    At what age does the routine smear testing start?

    I've always wondered about that especially from the publicised Jade Goody incident. Is there a way to get one done earlier- or would you have to have reasons for it via the GP?

    I've heard that it's a little bit awkward but I think just knowing that it's something that's being monitored is a comforting thought. Try not to think about it, it'll be over before you know it.

    1337466263
    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
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    I find it bit uncomfortable, because he is taking a small sample from the cervix and I am not too keen on having my cervix touched even during sex. But its not like really painful, just an awkward feeling. I personally find that relaxing as much as possible helps and also thinking about something else.

    1337466788
    sweetlove666 [sign in to see picture]
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    Nymeria wrote:

    At what age does the routine smear testing start?

    http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/cervical-screening-test/pages/introduction.aspx

    I've had sti tests which involve taking swabs from the cervix, theyre awkard and uncomfortable but not too painful ( and im someone who get bad pain when my cervix is hit or knocked during sex) so hopefully smears won't be too bad

    1337467264
    xxfidgetxx [sign in to see picture]
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    Hey I had my first smear test about 6 months ago. I wasn't booked into have one and the nurse took me by surprise and said why don't you have one? I live in Wales and we can have them from an earlier age than in England.

    It wasn't anything to worry about at all. You can ask for a female nurse and they leave you while you get your bottom half undressed and then you lie back on a bed. They insert a speculum and then take the swab, it just feels like a little scratch. It's not painful, but it just feels a bit weird. It's over before you know it!

    The only thing to remember is that they've done it hundreds of times before and so they've seen everything. I hope this helps and you will be absolutely fine. xx

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    boobaloo [sign in to see picture]
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    Seriously don't worry I had one on Monday, it really is nothing to be worried about

    The nurse will be really chatty and not at all bothered about it so it will feel like nothing and over in seconds, it could save your life so its worth it.

    I have had probs and been to hosp for treatment and stuff but all ok now, it is all better than the alternative if you have Q's or are worried feel free to add me as a friend for a chat

    Lisa

    1337469896
    suze9 [sign in to see picture]
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    Its not in anyway shape fun but it is probably one of the most important things you can do for yourself. This is coming from someone who ignored hers and got told off by every single health professional I met during my twin pregnancy (and I can assure you it was a lot of them).

    Its uncomfortable, for less than 5 mins and that includes getting undressed, but I would only ever avoid my next one if my period was on at the same time. There are far too many stories of poor girls who died because they fall into the bracket of too old for the jab and too young for a smear!!!

    Dont be a statistic and move it and get it done like the brave woman you are xxx

    1337528857
    Tisme [sign in to see picture]
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    Smears are definately not the most dignified of procedures, but trust me on this, they are life savers. If i hadn't of had mine done regularly I wouldn't be here now to tell the tale

    1337531179
    MissKnki [sign in to see picture]
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    Hi, you have nothing to worry about. I agree with all the posts so far...it is not the most comfortable procedure, but it lasts the matter of a few minutes.

    My main concern the first time i went for a smear was the size of the speculum, as i am really petite. The nurse quickly put my mind at ease telling me there are a number of different sizes, so they choose the one that will make the process as comfortable as possible for you.

    Good luck for tomorrow!

    1337544280
    Imogen [sign in to see picture]
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    They invite you for smears earlier in Scotland than in England, I'm 24 and I've already had it twice, so I think they start inviting you when you're either 20 or 21, can't remember.

    It's definitely not the most comfortable experience, but as with all potentially emabarrassing medical things, I just go in there thinking that the nurse/doctor sees things like that all the time and it doesn't need to be awkward, just try not to think about it. Besides, you stay covered most of the time, and certainly the nurses who I've seen have been so quick they're in and out of there in about 15 seconds flat! If you try and stay relaxed it shouldn't even be too uncomfortable, the worst part for me is usually how cold the lubricant is.

    At the end of the day, it could potentially save my life so I'm more than willing to put up with the discomfort. To be honest, if they offered me it more regularly than every three years then I would probably go, I'm not that bothered!

    1337545447
    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
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    Its a test they do to monitor any changes on womans cervix, in order to check that there are no changes, which could lead to cervical cancer.

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    naughtywildfun90 [sign in to see picture]
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    omg, im not exactly "looking forward to it" but i am in a wierd way.

    i had a woman approach me in town quite a few weeks ago and she asked my age and then asked if i would be going for my smear test when it comes to it, if i was going to be embarrassed at the thought of someone poking around up "my lady parts" etc. My reply made me sound terrible! i said exactly this "my son was born premature and i had a difficult pregnancy so im used to people pokin around up there!" *complete cringe* the woman politely said i wouldnt say that too loud if i was you. xx

    1337634349

    [suspended user]

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    ladies just bite the bullet, cervical cancer is a killer and isnt a nice way to go, Ive had men and women fiddling about with my man bits, embarrasing but neccessary and I got over it. With the help of my teddy bear of course.

    1337634396
    Miss BoomStick [sign in to see picture]
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    I recently got a letter from my doctor saying I need to book mine. I keep putting if off eventhough I know I shouldn't.

    1337634868
    Dee_licious333 [sign in to see picture]
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    gunther wrote:

    ladies just bite the bullet, cervical cancer is a killer and isnt a nice way to go, Ive had men and women fiddling about with my man bits, embarrasing but neccessary and I got over it. With the help of my teddy bear of course.

    You say that Gunther, but I would love to see you guys go through what we have to every few years.

    An example for me was when i was just 19 years old. I was three months pregnant. I had to have a smear, god knows why, especially as i was pregnant. (i found out later by my own doctor that they should never have given me a smear so far into the pregnancy)

    Not only was the doctor and nurse in the small room with me but they chose to have 3 male trainee nurses in the room. Can you imagine my horror when i realised this. I dont recall them asking me but telling me they were there to observe. I had no friends or family with me.

    That wasnt even the worse bit.

    The worse bit, was having a cold instrument shoved inside me .. i was in pain and told them so. They told me to relax. Pretty difficult when you have 5 people watching you.

    Well, once done I had to put my knickers on, knowing they would be blood stained and the nurses didnt offer any pads or such to stop the bleeding.

    It was one of the worse experiences of my life.

    Easier said than done dont you think Gunther??

    I have to say, i have since had smears but it took me years to find the courage.

    1337635204
    Abots [sign in to see picture]
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    Dee_licious333 wrote:

    gunther wrote:

    ladies just bite the bullet, cervical cancer is a killer and isnt a nice way to go, Ive had men and women fiddling about with my man bits, embarrasing but neccessary and I got over it. With the help of my teddy bear of course.

    You say that Gunther, but I would love to see you guys go through what we have to every few years.

    An example for me was when i was just 19 years old. I was three months pregnant. I had to have a smear, god knows why, especially as i was pregnant. (i found out later by my own doctor that they should never have given me a smear so far into the pregnancy)

    Not only was the doctor and nurse in the small room with me but they chose to have 3 male trainee nurses in the room. Can you imagine my horror when i realised this. I dont recall them asking me but telling me they were there to observe. I had no friends or family with me.

    That wasnt even the worse bit.

    The worse bit, was having a cold instrument shoved inside me .. i was in pain and told them so. They told me to relax. Pretty difficult when you have 5 people watching you.

    Well, once done I had to put my knickers on, knowing they would be blood stained and the nurses didnt offer any pads or such to stop the bleeding.

    It was one of the worse experiences of my life.

    Easier said than done dont you think Gunther??

    I have to say, i have since had smears but it took me years to find the courage.

    You can always say yes or not to having students watch the doctor/nurse. I'm sure if you'd have asked, they'd have gone.

    That does sound like a bad experience, I sympathise with you and it is good to see that you have since had a smear test.

    I do agree with Gunthers point, surely that embarrasment or discomfort for 5 minutes or whatever is worth it, to save your life from such a horrible disease. I've been to the doctors over something similar and he could touch my balls all day if it meant they didn't need to be removed.

    1337635333
    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
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    Dee_licious333 wrote:

    gunther wrote:

    ladies just bite the bullet, cervical cancer is a killer and isnt a nice way to go, Ive had men and women fiddling about with my man bits, embarrasing but neccessary and I got over it. With the help of my teddy bear of course.

    You say that Gunther, but I would love to see you guys go through what we have to every few years.

    An example for me was when i was just 19 years old. I was three months pregnant. I had to have a smear, god knows why, especially as i was pregnant. (i found out later by my own doctor that they should never have given me a smear so far into the pregnancy)

    Not only was the doctor and nurse in the small room with me but they chose to have 3 male trainee nurses in the room. Can you imagine my horror when i realised this. I dont recall them asking me but telling me they were there to observe. I had no friends or family with me.

    That wasnt even the worse bit.

    The worse bit, was having a cold instrument shoved inside me .. i was in pain and told them so. They told me to relax. Pretty difficult when you have 5 people watching you.

    Well, once done I had to put my knickers on, knowing they would be blood stained and the nurses didnt offer any pads or such to stop the bleeding.

    It was one of the worse experiences of my life.

    Easier said than done dont you think Gunther??

    I have to say, i have since had smears but it took me years to find the courage.

    Every few years... I have to go through it every 11-12 months! And yep. I did bleed few times, not much, but apparently it is normal. Few times it was pretty painful. and cramps.

    I admit I am not looking forward July.... Due for another smear test.

    Abots: the discomfort lasts more than 5 minutes for me. I can get bad cramping for the rest of the day or even a day or 2 after. And I can be spotting after it for a day too. And last year I avoided inserting anything in for few days, which would also mean no sex for my partner. Just did not feel like it, at all.

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    Dee_licious333 [sign in to see picture]
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    Abots, I disagree. No disrespect here but you are a male, you have no idea what it feels like.

    It was more than discomfort and embarrassment. In fact you are suggesting that i should have just got over it!!

    Until you understand how a naive 19 year old girl who is alone feels, perhaps you should reserve judgement!!

    Also, you mention you can just say no to having trainees there. Well its not that easy. I was shy, naive .. i think they knew that i was unlikely to refuse.

    1337635677

    [suspended user]

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    Dee you have my sympathy, I started writing this ( it isnt finished) to sort of self council myself, some things that have happened to me still trouble me. After the part I have finished I spent 2 months permanently naked having to ask a nurse to help me with every toilet activity asking for suppositories and asking to have your bum wiped changes your mindset at 17.

    quote

    As a young boy I was anaemic. I existed on kidneys, liver, eggs and milk and was as thin as a rake. A regular feature was blood tests. I didn’t know what this was all about because i was only 5 to 6 but it was fascinating. A nice lady would get this huge needle and put it in my arm then suck the blood out. Mum told me to be brave and I was brave because I didn’t cry. I thought it was great. Then one day I had a new nurse, a bit of an ogre. She told me to look away, suddenly I had nothing to see, I could hear ogre clanking things about and unpacking things but couldn’t see it. Eventually when poker face had sorted herself out she started swabbing and tapping and searching for a vein. I can still remember the tension building up then she jabbed me with the needle and it hurt like hell. I jumped and squealed " keep still you stupid boy" she said, as she had another go, finding veins wasn’t her forte. I tried as best I could but it felt more like a knife than a needle. Eventually it was over and with blood coming out of my elbow I went out of the room in tears, I hadn’t been a good boy and I hadn’t been a brave boy, I hated ogre for showing me up.

    The next time I went for a test I knew the score, ogre was there and just the same, but I wasn’t the same. I had had a few weeks to think about it. This time I wouldn’t cry, this time I wouldn’t flinch or move. This time I would be a good boy and more important a brave boy for my mother. Ogre went through her routine of incompetence, crashing about and dropping trays, while I stretched out my arm waiting. All the time I was waiting I was cutting my arm from my mind, making sure it wouldn’t move. I didn’t listen to her fiddling with syringes and needles I concentrated on the clock ticking, as the needle slowly swept round. Eventually ogre decided where she would probe for a vein and started fiddling about I remember the dull sensation of pressure but kept my mind on the clock. Ogre you ain’t gonna beat me this time. I stared at the clock, as if it was the moon. At last she had finished and it was all over. Mum said "what a brave boy didn’t that hurt?", "No mum, not really" I said, but she saw the bruising and she knew, I never saw ogre again, mum saw to that.

    Years later I was 13, it was a Saturday, mum went to do her job at the church, I did my jobs, cleaned the fire, hovered round then went to the shops on my bike. Half way there I had a stabbing pain in my stomach, I went with the list, got the shopping and the pain got worse. By the time I got home I was struggling to walk, I knew what this was I had had it before, my appendix was off again. I curled up on the sofa and waited.

    My mother came in and immediately called for the doctor, Dr Neish came straight away, he was nice, did all the tests pin across the stomach and pressing his fingers in my stomach, then called an ambulance. That was a first! Within ten minutes the ambulance arrived and we were off but the pain was getting worse. At the hospital the nice nurses told me to undress. Then a big man the surgeon came in. He started pressing at my stomach which hurt if you tensed your muscles, but I knew what that was all about, easy, just relax and don’t fight it then it doesn’t hurt so much, but feels wobbly inside. I had had a grumbling appendix a few times and knew the danger if it burst, but everyone was calm and so i wasn’t too worried. The doctor was speaking to my mother, " the doctor has to examine your bottom she said, do you want me to stay". "Examine my bottom" funny that, what have my buttocks got to do with my appendix I thought. "No, no need" I said and she went out.

    "Roll over on your side son" the nurse said so I did "and curl up in a ball the doctor will examine you, don’t worry it won’t take long". I curled up in a ball and the nurse put her hand on my shoulder, "That’s a good lad" she said "doctor will examine you just hold still". Suddenly I felt his finger in my anus and then up into my rectum , the nurses hand pressed more firmly on my shoulder " thats a good lad, hold still, your doing well son, just relax, don’t worry it will soon be over, your doing so well" she just kept talking and talking, reassuring and leading me through it while pressing firmly on my shoulder. In the end I felt his finger go out, "you did well son, how did it feel"? I was absolutely shocked and speechless, I opened my mouth and just couldn’t speak. "How did that feel" she said again "uncomfortable" I just repeated her word " uncomfortable" but it was a lie, it was strangely pleasurable, and I felt ashamed, was I gay was I a poofter I didn’t know what to think. Then I heard a cough, I knew that cough, I turned round but the nurse pressed against my shoulder, it was my mother who had been there all the time. At the time it was the most humiliating thing I could imagine I was a boy I had been penetrated by a man as a woman and also my mother looked on, was I gay, if not why was it strangely enjoyable?. As a man I know a mother always guards her brood. A 13 yr old boy doesn’t consider it was only a few years before that she was changing nappies and massaging my foreskin to prevent circumcision, he just feels completely belittled like I did.

    It was a crisp autumn morning, a little damp and cold but bright sunshine. My bike didn’t start very well so I was a bit late. Wendy was stood at her road end waiting and she hopped on. Wendy wasn’t the prettiest but she was conspicuously the brightest with flashing twinkling eyes, a very naughty smile and a knowing look. Just coming to the art college a van stopped. I moved out to pass, glanced at his rear to make sure I didn’t hit it and SHIT BRAKE, BRAKE, the bike dipped forward, Wendy slammed into my back doubling the weight on my arms then crunch the bike hit the car, I had nowhere to go. My knee struck the front of the bonnet and my whole upper body lurched forward, SLAM my head hit the bonnet. Rebound was in slow motion floating in silence until "AYA, AYA, AYA" I squealed like a stuck pig, the pain from my hip and leg hit me as I hit the ground. What the hell was this? A huge lump in my groin where my cock should be, I put my hand on it, strange it didn’t hurt. I felt hot all over and sweating like I was working out. A warm feeling started to spread all over my groin I looked down, Jeessus I am wetting myself, can’t stop, can’t even feel it .

    Where’s Wendy? Her shoe was in front of me, but where is she? I looked up, Oh my God there she is and she isn’t moving. She looks dead. I tried to pull myself towards her but my leg was on the ground, as I pulled along the road everything moved except my leg. Blooody Hell l I moved two inches and couldn’t take it any more I felt I was pulling my body apart. "how is she, how is she" I just got blank looks. A lady came into view, tall and elegant, but with a grey face, she looked down at me and her eyes glazed as she feinted, a man stood close by caught her as she wilted.. What’s up with her I thought, so I looked at my leg. That can’t be, that just can’t be, my leg was twisted round so my feet were facing in opposite directions almost and there was a flap in my jeans. Like an anatomical drawing I could see where both my jeans and skin were ripped open, exposing the joint below. Am I going to get out of this?

    Luckily an ambulance was on another call, they attended to Wendy first. Thank God they were putting on a neck brace and giving oxygen, you don’t do that if she is dead, but a neck brace? She must be paralysed or something. One friend maybe paralysed, one lady so repulsed by me she collapses, this was becoming a horror show. A second ambulance was ordered for me and it arrived promptly, luckily the hospital was only a mile away. How to get me on a stretcher? Good question! My damaged right leg was fairly straight but my left was bent at the knee and pointing forwards from the hip. I was laid on my side. "Look son, we’ve got to strap your legs together", the ambulance man said. We will lift your bad leg up, you move the good leg down so they are both together. Yeh that’s easy. Except to move one leg you normally push against the other. I tried every which way, and every way sent cannon balls flying round my pelvis. Eventually I bit the bullet, got as good a grip as I could on the road with my hands and forearm and pushed. Gasping for air I pushed and pushed. "That’s it, nearly there" a lady said, strange because I don’t remember seeing her. "We will soon have you in hospital, you’ll be OK" she went on . Easy to say, I was struggling with this, every movement I made pulled my insides as if in two pieces, it was indescribable, what had I done that hurt so f*cking much. At last with me sweating like a bull they strapped my legs together, clipped the stretcher around and put me in the ambulance. The paramedic put a cloth under my face so I didn’t bleed all over from my burst lips then we sat quietly. Peace at last, I rocked from side to side as the ambulance made its way and with the rocking I drifted away into a sleep as if I had been awake for two days.

    AAAAW I woke up, I was being lifted across onto the A&E Triage table, confusing sounds of people babbling away, my sister is a nurse, they know what they are doing, I just drift away it’s easier that way. Then a strange ripping sound and pulling at my hips, that is, they are cutting my jeans off me, more cutting sounds then suddenly I feel my jeans disappear and the cold air wash around my legs. Schnip, schnip, schnip , three more cuts and I am naked, suddenly all the voices I hear are female, I am really naked. Good God things must be serious no one even said a word to me. I lift my head and open my eyes, what the hell is that, some black guy has his hand s on my balls. "Oh how is that being feeling" he says, I close my eyes "it isn’t feeling anything at all" what is going on here I can’t feel it, a room full of women, a man with his hand on my balls and I can’t feel anything. "I must check if you are injured" says Doctor Lahl, "well check then but I can’t feel sod all you numpty" i snap back. I allow myself to drift away and escape from what I don’t want to know. Sh*t what the F*ck is that, what are they doing I scream and scream at the pain in my legs and hips it feels like my body is being pulled in two. What the F*ck are you up to you wankers, my leg is broken fix it, put it in a pot and fix it! In a rage, maddened like a horse at Agincourt I desperately tried to throw a punch at them standing about two yards away just to get them out of my life. SI heard a voice in the darkness, a still small voice of calm that I seemed to have lost with my old saints, a beautiful voice full of warmth experience authority and charity. "Stop everybody" she said and eventually and at last the pain subsided to a throbbing ache. "Son, your leg isn’t broken it is dislocated, we are trying to find out if there is any other damage, we need to take some X Rays". Thank god for that, at last something that made some sense. "We are trying to help you but you must help us" she went on in a lovely soft Geordie brogue. "We can’t stop it hurting and we don’t want to hurt you, but it has to be done or you may lose your leg, if you move then we can’t see anything on the X-ray". "We want to help you but you must help us, I am here and I will help you through it". Be brave son and you will be ok". Now I had something and someone to work with!

    My guardian guided me through it, "we have to lift your left leg" , "hold my wrist and get ready", "that’s it, now we are taking the X-ray, hold still, hold still, that’s it not long to go" Suddenly the pain I couldn’t abide was tolerable. She kept up her dialogue, I have no Idea for how long, Sometimes I was unconscious, sometimes I couldn’t see, but hear the sounds of the technicians. Other times I couldn’t hear or see but just feel a pain in my abdomen and a soft small wrist in my hand while another hand stroked the back of mine. I floated off to another place, black and cold except for a warm woman’s wrist in my hand and soft fingers stroking the back of mine, while all the time when I was capable of hearing anything her voice was there, re assuring, comforting and encouraging. At times it was a beautiful feeling of floating, alone with a voice and a hand on mine, as a planet or ball on the sea surrounded in darkness by warmth, love and care.

    I awoke in a different place, bright light with noisy urgent conversations. Now there was a new torment, I hadn’t eaten or drank anything all day. I was laid on a trolley. My lips were bruised and dry my tongue swollen and parched I must drink. A nurse passed "please can I have some water I asked" I am so sorry son but you can’t, you will have an operation soon and you can’t eat or drink before. "Oh please my lips are so dry I can hardly speak" I croaked. I knew what "nil by mouth" meant and why, but surely a little water can’t harm anything? What a sweet beauty the nurse was, surely too young to be working, a winning smile and a straight fringe above flashing and twinkling eyes. She was a seventeen year olds most perfect dream, and her voice matched her looks, light and giggly but professional and measured." I will bring a sponge for your lips if that will help" she said. "Oh please I replied I am so dry" I replied. Eventually she returned, I felt the cool refreshing sponge stroking past my lips, instinctively I bit it. What a wonderful feeling, cool water at last, suddenly water tasted, and tasted fantastic. Now I understood what those old war movies in the desert were telling me about thirst. "No you don’t" suddenly my beauty became a terrible tease "you can’t drink, if you do that again I will stop" she said and the giggle in her voice became serious and dominant. "Ok, ok but please just wet my lips again" I pleaded and for a minute or so she stroked my lips with the sponge, it was refreshing but not what I needed, my tongue was throbbing and I was swallowing nothing all the time, the water I craved was just millimetres from my mouth but any move to get it would mean another telling off and my giggly nurse would be gone. While the sponge on my lips was nice, water so close to my mouth was sweet hell. Eventually she had to go and I thanked her, I thanked her so much for her time and kindness while inside I was going wild with a thirst she had only made worse.

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