Kinks: Born or made?

recently ask my Partner when he realised he was into BDSM. apparently He used to tye himself up when he was little and realise (from the internet) that other people liked the same sort of things as him when he was about 11.

myself, i cant remember anything i did when i was little which sugests a tendancey towards BDSM other than prahaps enjoying holding onto electric fences. i do remember liking the idea of sex with handcuffs when i was about 13/14. i didnt know about BDSM untill my partner introduced me to it and i ended up loveing it. the only other thing i can connect is that my mum has always encouraged me to be very independent and not let anyone control me etc. but now im am verry definately a sub and i always have been rebelious but then i have always respected my mum.

so you see, you could concider my partner as "born" and me as "made" (slightly jelous of my partner for always being so sure of himself)

what i was wondering was if anyone remembers/ have been told about anything they did when they were little which they can link with being into BDSM or any other Kinks now and how old people were when they became sure they were into these things/ that other people liked same thing.

Just wondering

...

 I've always relished being dominated just never realised it till I was a grown adult. When I look back my kinks were always there.

 Me and my friends used to play a lot of spy type games when we were younger one that kept repeating it's self was one where one person would have to torture information out of the other I was so good at the evil torturing stuff... if only I had known how much more evil I could be :L

My bf used to dress up in his little sisters dresses when he was very young and would tie himself up to sleep with his dads ties. He didnt even know what he was doing back then, it just felt right. I have very personal fetishes that am still not comfortable with, but I knew about them also from  a very young age, noticing from as young as 8 or 9 the feeling this fetish gave me, ofc I didn't really link it until I did a bit of research a few years ago into these feelings.

we used to tie eachother up as kids too boys and girls and make each other stand naked in the field or behind the shed.one of us went on to be a prostitute one is a succesfull builder who use to like fucking boys in the arsehole hes got 3 kids now and is normal as expected and the other is me i like women but love to watch shemale stuff and lesbians too sometimes i think it was born but normal

 i used to tie myself up as well, so in that sense my submissiveness is born

particular kinks - some i learn about and think that they would be fun. so maybe it's a bit of both?

we all well some of us seem to have stared at an early age !!!

lickmadick wrote:

we all well some of us seem to have stared at an early age !!!

i think lots of people who are comfortable with their sexuality have been aware of it for quite a while or earlier than their peers.

it seems as well (to me at least) that people who are more comfortable with it loose their virginities later

i lost my anal virginity before my penile one due to laying around at an early stage of my life

I didn't tie myself up as a kid or anything like that, but when I was 8 I'd put my dolls in sex positions. 

AliMc wrote:

I didn't tie myself up as a kid or anything like that, but when I was 8 I'd put my dolls in sex positions. 

i used to 'hav sex' with my pillows

all very interesting guys, this is something that realy facinsates me

lost my virginity to a girl from a farm where i grew up we were out riding (horses) at

the time and it had been raining a lot before we got back.

after sorting the horses out we were soaked right through so stripped down to undies it was rather a turn on

we ended up having sex there on the spot very attracted to each other anyway, she lay down on some bales (uncomfortable )and i entered her and started to build up a rythm as i looked up at her i noticed she had put her hands in holding on to the stirups tensing up and telling me harder i think  from then on i was hooked .... yes we swapped around too ;)

well it goes down to the basic nature/nuture debate psychologists have argued about for decades, i personally beleive as the kinky side of people isnt a basic human requirement such as breast feeding which comes naturally it must be learnt as you grow. either way its fun so balls to all the reasoning to it. xx

Growing up our house was very open and honest about sex nothing was ever a taboo subject yet out of the three of us ( I have 2 brothers ) I am most definietly the most open and adventurous where as one brother is a total prude and is purely an in bedroom guy he doesn't even discuss it, my other brother will discuss sex if it's regarding him but will leave the room at the smallest hint others are having sex.

So that does leave me with the question why?

We are all very close in age so it's not that and we all had the same background so it's not that either

So could it be something we are born with or could it be that I simply was more curious growing up so asked more questions

This has definietly given me a lot to think about, great thread thanks for starting it xxx

I've done the same! about 8 years old, chain and locked myself up naked!

And I've always love ladies feet from a young age too! 

That would explain why I like BDSM, and foot fetish.....

not sure of the answer, its a bit like sexuality, you are what you are. but as far as i'm concerned...."who cares"? lol i love what i love and have always done so....does that make me a bad girl? well i sure hope so :D

My gf was previously in a loving long term relationship with someone who wasn't abusive, but very 'over powering' to the extent that despite their mutual feelings and attraction, she just had to leave. As this was her first relationship, (they got together as teenagers) and obviously had a big impact on her, I have to admit it has made me wonder if there is any relation between this, and her enjoyment of her submitting herself to me in the bedroom, and demanding that I be 'her man'.

 Looking back, i can definitely recognise things i did as a child that point towards my submissive nature, but a lot of things i have only explored with my currrent partner, so i guess its a bit of both.

three months in hospital gave me some wierd fantasies i had never had before and cured me for ever of the "nurse" fantasy.

It's a combination of both I think.

My cross dressing started at a very early age and just never really went away and grew over time.

My enjoyment of being dominant however is something that didn't kick in until my mid 20's