• Lost - Libido. Last seen......

    Lou232 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 47
    • Joined: 22 Sep 2008

    Help! My libido has disappeared and I don't know exactly why. The OH and I used to have great sex at least twice a day for three and a half years and now...it's more like twice a week. Worse yet, I'm becoming really body concious and having massive issues. I haven't orgasmed properly in months and things that used to get me hugely turned on have become huge turn offs, so bye bye multiple positions, spanking, nipple play, dress up, anal, giving him head - all my favourite things :( He still really wants and and in my head, so do I. Unfortunately, my body refuses to turn on so when we do try it's dry and uncomfortable.

    I've thought and the things that might affect it are...my CFS is getting bad again, which means I've had to stop doing sport and so gained LOADS of weight, we've moved in together into his parents' house, I'm finding my job difficult, all this stuff. But at the same time, this has been going on for about a year now and only the CFS has been around that long.

    Any advice? The dryness is a major issue for me as I've always been so far the other way, I've needed towels and regular changes of underwear! We've tried being slow and I've tried masturbation but even that doesn't help any more :(

    LilMissFrustrated [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1187
    • Joined: 9 Aug 2011

    Hi Lou I suffer from constant dryness due to a medical condition all I can say is lube, lube and more lube. I use lube on a daily basis even if I am not having sex or using toys as a kind of moisturiser.

    It really makes a difference so find one you like and use all the time.

    If your partner goes down on you I suggest you find one he likes the taste of !!

    My own personal preferences are :



    But find one that suits you and your partner, that could be fun in itself.

    Good luck xx

    Susie Bond [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 2
    • Joined: 1 Aug 2011

    Could be menopause or stress, yes. Could be the relationship...try another one and see if you get the same results.

    Pixieking [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 747
    • Joined: 31 Aug 2010

    When you are having sex those two times a week, are you having it how you would consider to be successfully? Are you enjoying it?

    Twice a day for the rest of your life is a really big ask. Now it's true that if something is bothering you then it's a problem, but considering that you are quite possibly having what any other pair would consider to be an ample amount of sex makes me wonder if your body is just slowing down a little.

    Dee_licious333 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1269
    • Joined: 16 Feb 2011

    Lube a definite if you are dry down there. I agree with the other posts too. Youve moved into his parents house? thats going to be a passion killer! Still 2 times per week in my books is fantastic. But i hear what you are saying as you say it used to be twice a day so thats quite a contrast. I hope you manage to sort things out x

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