• Problems with orgasm

    1326798876
    Brown eyed girl [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 43
    • Joined: 28 Apr 2009

    Embarrassed to say sometimes can't come or it tajes me long time doc says could br to do with illness i got parkinsons I'm only 51 i try with my boy friend get upset trying toys can take ages

    1326920167
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4261
    • Joined: 2 Feb 2008

    There can be so many reasons for this and I'm sorry it's upsetting you so much.

    Difficulty orgasming is completely normal - most women take at least 20 minutes so make sure you're not comparing to an invented "figure" of how long is too long. But if you are taking longer than "average" remember we are all different! It doesn't say anything about you OR your partner if you take time - or even if you simply cannot orgasm without some motorised help! Often we ladies need a long period of constant and fast stimulation that no human can provide without some severe cramp! It doesn't mean you've failed or your partner has failed!

    Secondly - it could be caused by the Parkinson's, any medications you take or any depression/stress you may be suffering with! All these things can cause difficulties in the bedroom. And placing pressure on yourself will not help - as soon as you *try* to orgasm, you're setting yourself up for failure. Relax, take the pressure off - you don't need to orgasm everytime you have sex - enjoy the sensations, enjoy your partner and enjoy the sex - it's about the journey, not the destination!

    I don't know if you were asking for help coming to terms with the issue, or help overcoming it - there are many ways to try and improve your ability to orgasm, but I think the most important thing is to realise it's not a problem first and then see if you can fix it!

    Adx

    1326929207
    Monkeyboy32 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 72
    • Joined: 11 Sep 2011

    Alicia D'amore wrote:

    There can be so many reasons for this and I'm sorry it's upsetting you so much.

    Difficulty orgasming is completely normal - most women take at least 20 minutes so make sure you're not comparing to an invented "figure" of how long is too long. But if you are taking longer than "average" remember we are all different! It doesn't say anything about you OR your partner if you take time - or even if you simply cannot orgasm without some motorised help! Often we ladies need a long period of constant and fast stimulation that no human can provide without some severe cramp! It doesn't mean you've failed or your partner has failed!

    Secondly - it could be caused by the Parkinson's, any medications you take or any depression/stress you may be suffering with! All these things can cause difficulties in the bedroom. And placing pressure on yourself will not help - as soon as you *try* to orgasm, you're setting yourself up for failure. Relax, take the pressure off - you don't need to orgasm everytime you have sex - enjoy the sensations, enjoy your partner and enjoy the sex - it's about the journey, not the destination!

    I don't know if you were asking for help coming to terms with the issue, or help overcoming it - there are many ways to try and improve your ability to orgasm, but I think the most important thing is to realise it's not a problem first and then see if you can fix it!

    Adx

    +1

    Totally agree with Alicia! foucus on the FUN, anything else is a bonus. Trying to force things will end with failure and being intimate with someone should always be a positive experience

    1326933699
    Brown eyed girl [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 43
    • Joined: 28 Apr 2009

    Thanks fir advice very kind u are right but i was worried cos sometimes i think i Shud be able to orgasm better an faster but i kno i Shud just enjoy intimate times with my special fella

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