VISITING A MISTRESS

Hi all I have been considering visting a professional mistress for the last six years but recently the urge seems to be getting stronger. Was wondering if anyone else has taken the plunge and what their experience was like.

 Approach with great caution 

Yes, but I will not be discussing anything here. Discretion is the key, for both parties.

Choose with care - there is pleanty of info on the web. Do especially read the website of any PD you decide to approach - and follow any instructions given, on how to proceed.

Good Luck.

Having watched Sherlock Holmes last night I must also urge caution. Think about the consequences.

Do you really want to end up at the centre of an international conspiracy?

GrayMatter wrote:

Having watched Sherlock Holmes last night I must also urge caution. Think about the consequences.

Do you really want to end up at the centre of an international conspiracy?

It was a great eppisode last night. it was the first time i watched it i'll be tuning in agian

 choose wisely. i know a professional mistress in my area who owns a 'dungeon' but the only problem is that she is a money grabbing fiend who doubles up as an escort, and she uses her dungeon as a brothel. also a psycho. i would be very careful who you pick and what they offer

I'd approach with caution.  What you think is ideal could turn into something totally horrifying :p  what I mean is, what she dyass/does, goes and you don't have a choice..................can you give up your full control?

I'd also research alot into this, get someone reptuable, not money grabbing or with a bad rep.

 General safety precautions are   -   see them live on cam if you can  and speak to them, discuss what you want and how much it will cost.

If you go, park a little bit away, don't take valuables like plastic or driving licence, or an expensive watch, pay cash 

Preferably find a lifestyle domme who might only want a present 

Research is key - use the web. Its all there. Do your homework. Assuming that the OP is serious, of course. And not a time waster. Or a troll.

Not experienced myself, but from those I've seen speaking on various sites, the genuine ones will not take offence to you wanting to make sure everything's safe before committing, as long as you're respectful.  You'll want to discuss with them beforehand what you do and don't want during a session, and whether they meet you on cam or in person or even via phone/e-mail, they should be happy to stick to any limits you may have.  And if after talking you decide that they won't do what you want, or just that you don't quite feel comfortable, then don't feel like you're locked into anything.  Anyone who tries to pressure you into booking with them when you're clearly not comfortable is probably better to steer clear of.

As others said, do your research, and trust your gut.  Even if everything seems 100%, if you're not happy, then you're out, don't feel guilty about it.  That said, don't waste anyone's time if you know you won't follow through beforehand: if you mess around enough of the genuine ones, you might find yourself with a reputation.

If you can locate a local munch, you might be able to get some more precise advise, as you can speak to people who've used the services of some locals and/or those who provide them.  you might meet someone you can work with there, get some names of good women to try, or even just get a list of ones you should steer clear of.  And if you're not up for meeting lifestyle folks face to face like that, then it can still be worth seeing if there's an online group, such as on FetLife or CollarMe or whatever, where you can speak to the same people anonymously.

A friend at college had a mother who was a mistress and to be honest she was very normal and upfront about it. She tended to meet her clients one to two weeks before there initial appointment for an "interview" to see what exactly the customer wanted. She worked within a rented space and kept it separate from her home life even though she didn't keep it a secret from her family. The whole thing seemed very above board. However she did say the number of women out there trying to rip people off is particularly bad in this "job" and that punters as they were called should also be cautiousabout being too adventurous on there first visit and to leave the more out there requests for when you know the "mistress" better.
I wouldn't be put off by it if you feel this is something you need to do but research and meet a few people before deciding. This is quite an underground activity personally but very easy to find out about publicly
Be careful and good luck

Strangely enough I was looking at a local Mistresses web page this evening before logging onto this site! Going through a bit of a Tease & Denial fetish at the moment and have been considering it. Probablyt never go through with it though as the prices quoted were pretty steep (£140 an hour to walk around on all fours and have my cock slapped!....)

Think everyone's advice is pretty sound and my main worry would be a) I get tied up and then she leaves with the money b) some massive boyfriend is waiting and robs you c) you get blackmailed or d) you get something nasty if they don't have good hygiene  (it seems a lot use their own "equipment").

Alternatively you could just make believe with webtease sites like Milovana or other web based fetish sites.

 I would say before you approach a Mistress that you do your homework and know exactly what sort of Mistress you are looking for. All have their specialities whether it be the nursemaid, the governess etc, know what your boundaries and limits are and then approach. Remember your manners, they will expect you to speak in the manner to which you will become accustomed, ie in a very submissive and appreciative manner. It is she you are looking to serve and NOT the other way round. A good Mistress will want to at least talk to you before she agrees to a session to know your limits/boundaries, what your expectations are and what you are prepared to do i.e do you wish to be feminised, wear womens lingerie? There's a lot to it ;O) You could try some of the sites suggested like fetlife, you'll find plenty on there and maybe you might get lucky and be able chat to one there to see if it's for you before you commit to spending your money. Good luck!

I highly recommend DDI for your PD needs. http://www.ddimag.com/directory.htm

You'll also find that the same names are circulated in localised fetish groups, so read up a little. As Jass says, Fetlife is an excellent port of call for recommendations.

Same as other have said!! you can never be too careful! do you homework, even if you a friend to ask around or "spy on them" well which is illegal! but it pays! some even work for drug dealers the illegal ones! so watch out!

But it more easier to hear about the rumours with the ones working with drug dealers! even the newpaper and internet is your friend, look at any past cases unsolved etc in regards of bad mistress!

But most likey for a stich up would happen out of sight like indoors or an alley way etc!

But better to meeting in a good public restaurant smart dressed! yeah I know spend money on dinner, but gives you a great chance of seeing the bird, and gain "Trust", of course if you have a friend sitting near by with his partner which he & she is dressed nice, "the mistress" shouldn't have a clue. If you have another friend near by that likes walking his large dog at night, he could have a nose around the alley ways for anything! etc! dogs are good at finding people in the shadows!

If the mistress goes to the "restroom" you stroke your hair back, handsign to your friends partner to follow her 10 seconds later, to "take meds" etc! if the mistress is making a setup! she stoke her hair coming out, or the all clear she rubs her leg at the table, of course if its trouble your friends leave and talk outside! and your male friend comes in and by the toilets his takes off his shoe a sign for come into the restroom, then all you have to do is spill a drink on yourself! and find out what going on!

And make a good run for it! or confront mistress about it! I would pay my friends dinners and the other mate with the dog a £100 for their time and dinner then be mugged!

But if it was a setup and you go outside with her down an alley way, you still got you mate with the dog! and two friend in the car park! and you don't claim to know each other if the police are involve just "good people helping"

Yeah I know others think I am paraniod and a fool, but you be a bigger fool for being mugged and blackmail at the sametime!

if she wants you to go back with her after dinner if all clear then do, but you friends follow too, and have some sort of panic button ect hidden on you! and don't be allow to be hand cuffed to the bed ect!

But she will most likey to have male friend in the house if so push the button and get, and your friend calls the police and make sure you say she could be armed! and see how quick the police get there!