• Is having an orgasm always important?

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    Lovehoney - Gemma [sign in to see picture]
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    Hello everyone,

    We've added a new poll on the Blog page asking about the importance of orgasms.

    The question is - Is having an orgasm always important?

    To participate in the poll just check out the right hand side of the blog page - and discuss your votes on this thread!

    There's also a post about the importance of orgasms too, if you fancy having a read.

    Thanks :-D

    Gem @ LHHQ Xx

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    Ginger Ninja Minge [sign in to see picture]
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    For me... not exactly. I can only speak for when I masturbate. I think I'd be content in making my future OH having an orgasm and I'm left dangling. But that would get me rather stressed out with me not having a release. I do think orgasms are important. It's basically the climax of sex and you have that soft feeling where you just snuggle up together, both contented. I think that in itself is romantic.

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    EskimoKisser [sign in to see picture]
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    As a man, I dont think we get the satisfaction without an orgasm, that said, i find it nearly as exciting to watch my OH orgasm, but not as satisfactory. if you get what i mean.

    Its important and necessary, but not all the time.

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    Nymeria [sign in to see picture]
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    I dont think having an orgasm is the most important factor of sex. I love the sensuality and intimacy behind sex; the feeling of wanting to pleasure eachother. Whereas orgasms can be explosive and amazing it's not the core element to sex at all, for me. My OH loves to pleasure me and I him. We like to delay reaching an orgasm when all we want to do is be in the moment and enjoy eachother.

    I also think with the thought behind having an orgasm with sex is that this added pressure can be counter productive to just having fun and enjoying it.

    I love the tips mentioned. =]

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    cheer_up [sign in to see picture]
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    It's pretty important to me, but not absolutely necessary.

    Probably the most important thing to me with sex is the intimacy. For me it's the ultimate way of showing my OH how much I love him; after all, it's something I've never done with anyone else.

    I can be horny as hell, and gagging for sex, but if it feels like a quicky, without the usual kissing and touching and intimacy, it can leave me feeling less satisfied than before, and I find it impossible to orgasm without that feeling of closeness. So it follows that even if I'm not horny at all, but my OH is, I'll make the effort to get into sex and ensure he gets his release but I won't be bothered about having one myself and am still left feeling utterly satisfied because he's made me feel loved.

    I don't know if that makes any sense whatsoever. Welcome to my brain...

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    Dirty Red Angel [sign in to see picture]
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    Personally, an orgasm is quite important to me and I feel somewhat left out if I don't orgasm and he does.

    Don't get me wrong, the journey is equally important but I want a feel good release too - and for me, that means I want to orgasm!! If I don't orgasm, I do tend to feel a little disappointed and frustrated......

    Perhaps it's because having an orgasm is considered to be 'normal' or 'part of the experience' whenever you read erotica, view porn or generally talk with your mates. So maybe I'm still trained to that line of thinking..... I don't know......

    Just my two cents worth!

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    CurlyCoupleWife [sign in to see picture]
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    Hmmm... I voted no.

    Whilst I love orgasming most of the time, sometimes it's not important.

    In fact, if I'm really tired from work or if I have stomach ache or back ache I'd rather just lube-up and enjoy the closeness, kisses & the feel of his skin against mine.

    Other times I just want to pleasure him (either through oral or intercourse) & that is more than enough of a buzz for me.

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    ju [sign in to see picture]
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    always... voted no.

    i orgasm easily but i don't mind when it doesn't happen. we tend to get carried away when he should be leaving for work... then there's not always time for me to orgasm. leaves me feeling turned on all day - & he knows it. i enjoy sex for the closeness too.

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    telmemore [sign in to see picture]
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    Voted No, Somtimes if Im in the mood and shes not, she will have sex or give me hand relieve. Then another time I will give her an Orgasm because she would like some fun. At the end of the day( or during the middle of it!) as long as you are both happy, its fine.

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    Dee_licious333 [sign in to see picture]
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    I voted no!

    I share the opinions above. There have been occasions where hubby has cum and i havent been able to and vice versa. Its not something we think about before we make love it either happens or it doesnt. Most of the time - 90% of the time both of us orgasm.

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    [suspended user]

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    i nearly allways do and if we can't we finish each other offf hard

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    Mr Monster [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm another one who's voted "No", although it is pretty important a lot of the time.

    Sometimes, it's just all about other things, and that's great.

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    [suspended user]

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    yeah it's not what we set out to do just enjoying it at the end is sometimes so nice

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    Incendiaire [sign in to see picture]
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    I don't really care that much about orgasms, which is probably unsual considering that I'm a guy.

    The way I see it, the orgasm is the one thing about sex which I can easily do myself, so when I'm with another guy what I'm most interested in is playing around with him, touching, caressing, exploring every inch of his body, making out. I think I'm into foreplay much more than sex, so I like to drag it out, once you reach the orgasm that's like the cue to call it quits. Sometimes when I'm done with a guy I'd rather just skip to the cuddling, rather than wait to finish receiving the courtesy reciprocal handjob. lol.

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    Gyrator53 [sign in to see picture]
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    I reckon the answer is no. However, thinking about it, my wife's orgasm is more important to me than my own. On the, thankfully, rare occasions that she does not make it I do feel decidedly unsatisfied even if I have orgasmed myself. So, perhaps the poll needs to be split to allow a 'no' for ones own and a 'yes' for your partner's - or vice versa for the selfish 8-)=

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    CurlyCoupleWife [sign in to see picture]
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    Incendiaire wrote:

    I don't really care that much about orgasms, which is probably unsual considering that I'm a guy.

    The way I see it, the orgasm is the one thing about sex which I can easily do myself, so when I'm with another guy what I'm most interested in is playing around with him, touching, caressing, exploring every inch of his body, making out. I think I'm into foreplay much more than sex, so I like to drag it out, once you reach the orgasm that's like the cue to call it quits. Sometimes when I'm done with a guy I'd rather just skip to the cuddling, rather than wait to finish receiving the courtesy reciprocal handjob. lol.

    You've hit the nail on the head there. Is an orgasm always important when I'm masturbating? Yes, that's why I'm masturbating. Whereas with sex there's much more going on you're enjoying exploring their body, the signs of their pleasure, the warmth of their skin.

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    ruffledsheets [sign in to see picture]
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    As someone who is into chastity and tease & denial, I'd have to say 'no'!

    For me, often the best ending to sexual play is leaving me aroused and wanting more. It all depends on what turns you on. For me, being brought to the edge over and over is iften more pleasurable than the actual orgasm.

    I won't duplicate my reply on the blog but I'd have to concur that intimacy is far more important, for me at least :-)

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    Pixie_Murree [sign in to see picture]
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    CurlyCoupleWife wrote:

    Incendiaire wrote:

    I don't really care that much about orgasms, which is probably unsual considering that I'm a guy.

    The way I see it, the orgasm is the one thing about sex which I can easily do myself, so when I'm with another guy what I'm most interested in is playing around with him, touching, caressing, exploring every inch of his body, making out. I think I'm into foreplay much more than sex, so I like to drag it out, once you reach the orgasm that's like the cue to call it quits. Sometimes when I'm done with a guy I'd rather just skip to the cuddling, rather than wait to finish receiving the courtesy reciprocal handjob. lol.

    You've hit the nail on the head there. Is an orgasm always important when I'm masturbating? Yes, that's why I'm masturbating. Whereas with sex there's much more going on you're enjoying exploring their body, the signs of their pleasure, the warmth of their skin.

    Everything you've said! I don't always orgasm as I can't from penetration alone. If its a quickie sex session we don't have time for him to go down on me for ages etc... and that doesn't bother me. I love the closness you get and the warmth of skin to skin.

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    shellyboo [sign in to see picture]
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    Orgasm has become less of a focus for me and my partner since we started going out -- to being, he found it difficult to climax from our sex due to nerves and confidence issues; and as a result of that it's never really been the most important part of our sex life!

    He loves teasing me, and playing with orgasm denial, so I for me, orgasm is never guaranteed! And even for him, sometimes he's happy just to see me come and not orgasm himself. It depends on our mood and energy levels, but definitely orgasm is not the point of our sex life.

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    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    As a lot of people know here - I rarely enjoy orgasming - I'm learning to enjoy it more, but often my muscles contract so much it can be quite painful. So no orgasm is definitely not important for me.

    I get more than enough satisfaction from the shared pleasure and I feel all mushy after he's orgasmed and ready for after orgasm snuggles. Me and WandA sorted it all when we first got together and it really took the pressure off - I don't think sex should be goal orientated :)

    Adx

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