• Asking so much at once..

    1315798454
    Haywire [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 35
    • Joined: 28 Nov 2010

    Hey there,

    My boyfriend of nearly two years has finally asked me to start taking pictures for him (which I have done), swollow and let him 'finish' on my face and body. I knew the day would come.

    I'm quite a self concious but proud person. I wouldn't mind trying to swollow for him, but I am severly uncomfortable with him 'finishing' on my face and body.

    I feel its degrading and revolting. I love using toys and games with him, but with this its different. I am a very proud and strong woman, and detest the idea of becoming just 'something to jizz on'.

    What are your ideas? And would you have any tips to overcome this fear and worry?

    (Btw, I don't watch porn)

    1315810717
    SEXYGET 69 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2491
    • Joined: 1 Dec 2008

    Hello and welcome to the forums Haywire :)

    Here's a link to a similar thread-

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/community/forums/sex-tips-and-talk/394324-is-it-degrading-for-a-man-to-ejaculate-over/

    My take on it is if you don't like it and you say *severly* and you've tried it out but still do not severly like letting him do it, then don't! You let him do it, so you've give it a go, made your mind up you don't like it so he should respect your wishes that you don't want to do it! If you want to do it for him again I can only suggest having some Baby wipes to hand to clean up afterwards or immediate shower. Myself and my OH will try anything twice. If one isn't happy about it we respect their wishes.

    Hope you get it sorted Haywire. SG x

    1315813451
    boobaloo [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 691
    • Joined: 9 Jul 2010

    Good Morning and Welcome

    As SG says as far as I am concerned if you dont like it and dont want to do it then dont do it, your not going to get any enjoyment out of it so why should you let him do it. Some people don't mind when guys do this to them (me included) but that doesn't mean that everyone will like it or should do it. Talk to him, explain that its something that you don't want to do, just cos you have been with him 2 years doesn't mean you have to do stuff just cos he wants it.

    1315814130
    Chimera [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 143
    • Joined: 23 May 2010

    I agree with the others, it's fair enough to try it out but if you don't like it, have good reasons not to like it, and get no enjoyment out of it, then he shouldn't put pressure on you to do it. Everybody is different, some people draw the line at watersports, others at swallowing or being finished over. Neither person is wrong. Try not to feel guilty about saying no, either; if guilt is a factor (and certainly don't go into a sexual act because you've been guilt tripped into it) try and find something new that you both enjoy - maybe a little light bondage or something?

    As for getting over the fear and worry, I suspect it's like most things - just try it out. You'll soon know whether your original opinion stands.

    1315814138

    [suspended user]

    suspended user
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2830
    • Joined: 30 Oct 2008

    hey Boobaloo i quite agree with you some people think they have the right but no,if the lady don't like it she don't have to we both enjoy it and find it fun but hey ho it's not for everyone is it!

    1315814225
    Chimera [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 143
    • Joined: 23 May 2010

    Oh, and welcome to the forums! I hope you enjoy them :)

    1315820974
    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2341
    • Joined: 8 Nov 2010

    Hello and welcome,

    I am also very proud woman, bit independent and stubborn. But I do let my partner to ejaculate on my body, but! If you are not comfortable you have to explain this to him. To be honest 2 years ago I would find it degrading, but I just changed. It is only degrading if you really want it to be. My partner often ends up with my wetness all over his body, so he is in a bit the same situation. Plus I can get very wet, so when giving me oral he always ends up with his face covered. But it is not something you have to do and it is something you may warm up to over time. Maybe not your face, but your body, you never know. But you have to be willing to do it, he can suggest it, of course, but not push you.

    1315823499
    Despina Rose [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3465
    • Joined: 18 Apr 2010

    As others have said, some people see it as degrading, others don't. If you try it and don't like then your partner should respect that.

    I would recomend if you are going to try it, get him not to ejaculate over your face, when I tried that I got it in my eye - painful!

    Lavelia got it spot on - He can suggest but not push you.

    1315824020
    Haywire [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 35
    • Joined: 28 Nov 2010

    Thanks guys, wasn't sure anyway was gonna respond to my pathetic wineing.lol

    1315824076
    MsGirth2011 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 167
    • Joined: 4 Sep 2011

    Hi

    I rather be jizzed on than take it in my mouth. but i strongly dislike it on my face I totally get where you are coming from though my current partner has had the snip so i love to feel come in me but if it was anyone else the condom is where it belongs or on my tits!

    I have a simular is issue with giving head i have a very delicate gag reflex but have found a way that i can manage it. the key is to communicate and tell him your not comfortable with what he wants but and to try and find a compromise

    BTW my BJ compromise i take the top too inches only they can not touch my head and i have mastered the art of a good hand job (well several great variants)

    Good luck

    1315824426
    Despina Rose [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3465
    • Joined: 18 Apr 2010

    Oh and for the swallowing part, it is really up to you. Some people like it, some don't mind it, some hate it. There really is no shame in not liking it.

    Food does change the taste a bit.

    If you don't like swallowing or having him ejaculate on you then get him to do so in a condom or have a tissue handy. You are giving him pleasure, who cares how it finishes? I know there are some people who don't get even that much pleasure, he should count himself lucky.

    1315824903
    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2341
    • Joined: 8 Nov 2010

    I think bowl for the cum if you dont want to swallow and glass of water to drink to wash away the taste are handy if you dont feel like swallowing. I would avoid running out of the room to sink, personally. It woud ruin the moment in my opinion.

    Or a condom, as MM suggested.

    1315826544
    ju [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 124
    • Joined: 16 Feb 2011

    you only do what you're happy to do. that's the main thing. it seems, too, that he's asking for you to try a lot of new stuff- maybe that's a bit overwhelming. you know what he wants now so the choice is yours. let him know that. also- likes & dislikes change... i used to swallow but, frankly, i can't be doing with it now... & there's other stuff i tried & liked which i'd said "no" to in the past. so never say never... & maybe make a few requests of your own.

    1315827399
    rach74 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1512
    • Joined: 3 Dec 2010

    as others have said its each to their own, what some like others dont, personally i love swallowing my OH cum and i love it on my face, yes in the eye is painful, but do what you want to, dont feel pressured into doing things you dont want to

    1315828146
    SexyBumBully [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 187
    • Joined: 14 Jun 2010

    I couldn't agree more with what everybody else is saying. Haywire, I was in the same situation that your in now a few months ago. My OH wanted to cum on me and I wasn't too keen on the idea but I gave it a go and now, I love it! A few times its even lead to a sexy shower together. But as everybody else has said, if your not comfortable, then don't do it As for the swallowing, I enjoy it but we always have a large glass of juice to hand for washing the taste away. My OH was lovely about it because he was the one who told me that if i didn't want to swallow, that would be fine too. Just do what makes you happy and I'm sure your OH will be happy too.

    Good Luck! ClareB

    1315830060
    fizzy [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2620
    • Joined: 31 Oct 2010

    Hi and welcome to the forum!

    1315854766
    Haywire [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 35
    • Joined: 28 Nov 2010

    ju wrote:

    you only do what you're happy to do. that's the main thing. it seems, too, that he's asking for you to try a lot of new stuff- maybe that's a bit overwhelming. you know what he wants now so the choice is yours. let him know that. also- likes & dislikes change... i used to swallow but, frankly, i can't be doing with it now... & there's other stuff i tried & liked which i'd said "no" to in the past. so never say never... & maybe make a few requests of your own.

    I think that is another thing that might be grinding me, I feel feel overwhelmed by all that he is asking at once.

    But there isn't really anything I want to try..

    1315864509
    Despina Rose [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3465
    • Joined: 18 Apr 2010

    Haywire wrote:

    ju wrote:

    you only do what you're happy to do. that's the main thing. it seems, too, that he's asking for you to try a lot of new stuff- maybe that's a bit overwhelming. you know what he wants now so the choice is yours. let him know that. also- likes & dislikes change... i used to swallow but, frankly, i can't be doing with it now... & there's other stuff i tried & liked which i'd said "no" to in the past. so never say never... & maybe make a few requests of your own.

    I think that is another thing that might be grinding me, I feel feel overwhelmed by all that he is asking at once.

    But there isn't really anything I want to try..

    Don't try what you don't want to, being in a sexual relationship is about respect for the other person.

    If you are comfortable doing one or more of these then that is fine, if not then that is also fine.

    1315906317
    Postillionager [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 234
    • Joined: 24 Apr 2010

    Haywire wrote:

    Thanks guys, wasn't sure anyway was gonna respond to my pathetic wineing.lol

    It's not pathetic at all, it sounds like he's being rather selfish; does he realise that you are not at all keen to try this? For me, the whole point of being intimate with someone is that you are both enjoying it mutually. I would never want my partner to do something for me if they did not enjoy it themselves.

    If he really wants to make a mess on you, the least he could do is offer to lick it up afterwards so that you get some pleasure from it too.

    1315916293
    Despina Rose [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3465
    • Joined: 18 Apr 2010

    Postillionager wrote:

    Haywire wrote:

    Thanks guys, wasn't sure anyway was gonna respond to my pathetic wineing.lol

    It's not pathetic at all, it sounds like he's being rather selfish; does he realise that you are not at all keen to try this? For me, the whole point of being intimate with someone is that you are both enjoying it mutually. I would never want my partner to do something for me if they did not enjoy it themselves.

    If he really wants to make a mess on you, the least he could do is offer to lick it up afterwards so that you get some pleasure from it too.

    Postillionager has hit it right on the head here - it isn't just about one person. I would recommend you talk to your partner, make sure he understands that you are not keen on this, it is unfair for you to be asked and you feeling like you have to do something.

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.