• Is it just me?

    1312456640
    Katherine* [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 108
    • Joined: 25 Jul 2011

    I absolutely love Anal sex, However my paretner has to get me so turned on so that we can do it, otherwise its impossible as the pain is unbarable, is there anyway it can be made easier? Toys or stuff that could help?

    1312457402
    suze9 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 378
    • Joined: 5 Feb 2009

    Hi and welcome to the forums, not my thing but if you type into the white box with the magnifying glass it should bring up loads of other threads on the subject you have entered. Hope you find the information to help you xxx

    1312457790
    scwhartz [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 117
    • Joined: 22 Dec 2010

    Use plenty of lube, and you could start off with a small butt plug, then work yourself up to bigger ones.

    1312458994
    XXXGXSTRINGXXX [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 89
    • Joined: 28 Jul 2011

    definately lube helps and http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=233 is definately a good one in my opinion..

    You definately have to be totally relexed to try anal sex its a very delicate area and you get pain for a reason, you can easily tear down there so dont try to rush things take it slow, try out a finger first to get you a little more relaxed or get your self a set of these http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=13504..

    The more patient you are the more confident you will get and the more relaxed you will be next time dont try and force it just slow down and enjoy...

    hope this helps

    1312462120
    rach74 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1221
    • Joined: 3 Dec 2010

    yes agree with above, lube lube and more lube and relax and enjoy, if you clench up it will hurt and also means you are not relaxed and not really wanting it, just take things slow little bit at a time

    1312481840
    Enjoy me [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 41
    • Joined: 15 Jul 2011

    This is the same as me, i find that i have to be really turned on for it to actually happen. My current method is to not orgasm for a couple of days leading up to when i plan for anal. Unfortunately that has its down sides - Mean that it cant be spontaneous and i am so horny by the time we do have anal sex that i come almost instantly. Will try out what these kind people have suggested. Hope you find something that works...

    Em x

    1312557853
    hornyredhead [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 30
    • Joined: 4 Aug 2011

    Lube, fingers first, then a slim dildo/vibe/plug, then GO SLOWLY!!

    1312629220
    Postillionager [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 214
    • Joined: 24 Apr 2010

    Katherine* wrote:

    I absolutely love Anal sex, However my paretner has to get me so turned on so that we can do it, otherwise its impossible as the pain is unbarable, is there anyway it can be made easier? Toys or stuff that could help?

    Hi and welcome.

    This question comes up quite often; my best advice would be to take your time, you can't rush these things. In fact, for a truly enjoyable anal session, you should both set aside an afternoon or a whole evening. You could start off by taking a bath together, wash and dry eachother, just take some time to cuddle and kiss while you anticipate what lies ahead. He could give you an all over body massage, lavishing plenty of attention on your most sensitive areas.

    Like all erogenous zones, your ass will respond best with plenty of foreplay; try tentative stroking and teasing, gradually homing in on the more intimate areas. You can combine this with all sorts of other types of stimulation, try doing this to each other and see what you each find enjoyable. Anilingus (oral/anal play) is not everyone's cup of tea, but if you are both up for it, it should be perfectly fine after a bath or shower. It is intensely intimate and can produce some very pleasurable sensations.

    Whatever activities you find enjoyable, you may reach a point where you want to go further, or you may be enjoying it so much that you just have to come there and then. I recommend going with the flow, if you're on the verge of a delicious climax, just go for it, you can always go further next time.

    If you are ready to go further, you can try some penetration. At this point I should say it really helps if he is willing to let you penetrate him too, so he knows what it feels like and you will both learn how to relax. The golden rule is ofcourse to use plenty of good lube, and be sure that it's a brand which suits you and won't cause any soreness or a reaction. I used to use Maximus all the time, but recently I've found it gives me a slight stinging sensation which is uncomfortable, so now I use Durex 2in1 and that's fine for me. And be careful not to transfer anything from the anus to the vaginal area.

    The lube should be applied to the exterior of the anus and gently massaged in. Your partner needs to work the lube into your opening, very gently, just a small fingertip at first, slowly going a little deeper as you become more relaxed. As you are the one being penetrated, you should feel free to set the pace, say exactly what you want where, how deep, what angle, etc. Just go as far as you are comfortable with, don't put yourselves under pressure, you don't have to go all the way all at once.

    For pleasurable full anal intercourse, you want to work up in stages from one finger to two or a medium sized toy, applying more lube each time. With each insertion, wait until you are completely comfortable and relaxed so that the object can slide in and out effortlessly before moving onto the next. If you ready for full sex, your partner needs to be lubed and fully erect, but patient and gentle, so that he gradually penetrates you, just pressing the tip in at first, then slightly deeper as you become more relaxed. This can take up to ten minutes or more, it can be quite tricky for the man to resist the urge to come, so you might want to try using a dildo or a set of toys in various sizes instead. You may also find that anything deeper than a certain length is painful, so you both need to be aware of that.

    Once the penis is comfortably inserted, you should take things very slowly and gently at first. As you both become more accustomed to this way of making love, it will become easier and more pleasurable. It can take a few hours or more to get to this stage, but it is eventually possible to enjoy full, gentle coitus and even rapid thrusting, as long as you both know your limits, pace yourselves and make certain you are both safe, comfortable and take care of each other.

    The bottom line is, have fun! :)

    1312654177
    GingerConcubine [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 84
    • Joined: 31 May 2011

    Postillionager wrote:

    The bottom line is, have fun! :)

    Hehe, puns.

    Though I agree with that post in its entirety.

    1315215004
    Katherine* [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 108
    • Joined: 25 Jul 2011

    Thanks for all the help :D the lube does help alot but still takes a very long time to get anywhere from it, using the toys help alot aswell, still a tad painful but i dont mind, its great :D

    1315215882
    MsGirth2011 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 165
    • Joined: 4 Sep 2011

    Wear a butt plug during the day to warm up. Invest in two one slightly bigger and change it halfway through the day.

    be relaxed and go with the flow don't put pressure on yourself.

    1315221578
    Sacred [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 1
    • Joined: 6 Jul 2011

    I'm going to go against the grain and not recomend loads and loads of lube, it just dulls the sensation. Some lube sure, but not so much a train could pull through without you noticing.

    Instead try slowly warming up, I personally always find fingers to be painful so instead consider investing in a slimline vibrator. Once you're more accomadating of your new toy, you need to move up to something slightly bigger again. Get your partner to help out as I'm sure using the toys on you knowing what they are going to get next will only make them more excited. I find warming up with two or three toys works best and aim for something slightly bigger than your partner for your last toy, this will make it alot easier for your partner to enter you without any pain.

    Take it slow, don't rush it as anal sex is worth the effort.

    1315222588
    Despina Rose [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2694
    • Joined: 18 Apr 2010

    1. Lubricant and loads of it, anal lubricant is better.

    2. Relax and take things slowly.

    3. Slowly stretch with fingers or toys before.

    4. Communicate with your partner.

    1315245576
    Dee_licious333 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 1162
    • Joined: 16 Feb 2011

    Try having the dildo in your pussy whilst he gently eases his cock into your ass! you tend to forget the uncomfortableness and its really an amazing feeling!!

    1316780075
    Postillionager [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 214
    • Joined: 24 Apr 2010

    Just bumping this for Emily 1989 :-)

    1316780912
    emily1989 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 17
    • Joined: 2 May 2008

    ello!

    Thanks for that. we have tried it a couple of times but he gets really frustrated that i cant relax and really doesnt understand how much it can hurt. and then he gets bored of trying doesnt give me enough time and just goes in the other way which is fine but after trying so hard you kinda want to see it through cos ive heard its quite nice!

    MsGirth2011 wrote:

    Wear a butt plug during the day to warm up. Invest in two one slightly bigger and change it halfway through the day.

    isnt that uncomfy all day?? lol

    1316781560
    Postillionager [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 214
    • Joined: 24 Apr 2010

    Hi, sorry to hear that. I think he would really benefit from letting you penetrate him so that he will understand what it's like for you. If that's an absolute no-no, you could try the daytime butt plugs trick. As long you have a comfortable size to begin with, and re-apply lube now and then, it should be fine. The silicon ones are really bendy and give with your natural movements. If you ever experience any pain, you should stop, that part of your body is delicate so needs to be traeted with care.

    I do think it's a shame your man won't explore this properly, it's such a nice thing to do together.

    1316782105
    emily1989 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 17
    • Joined: 2 May 2008

    i was just reading the thread about anal for men and it sounds great. i am trying to think of a sensitive but sexy way of suggesting it to him but i dont want him to think i tihnk he's gay! lol

    i think i might try it during the day myslef and then go from there. i just think he needs a bit of reasuring that its an ok thing to do!

    1316786834
    Postillionager [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 214
    • Joined: 24 Apr 2010

    You could always show him this site? Or just try teasing, tickling and stroking him behind the balls and between his cheeks, a lot of men absolutely love having that during a blow job. If he enjoys that, give him time to get used to it, maybe he'll want to go a bit further with time.

    Anyway, good luck!

    1316972650
    Johnny Roach [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 287
    • Joined: 10 Oct 2010

    lube is your friend! the more the better!

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.