• LH forum makes me so depressed

    jaycloth [sign in to see picture]
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    I read some of these threads, and feel so unhappy.

    So many happy, unselfish people that want to do things to please their other halves and make them happy, and to enjoy themselves.

    I just want to cry.

    Dirty Red Angel [sign in to see picture]
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    What makes you want to cry in particular? Because your partner doesn't do anything like this? Whats wrong?

    Always remember appearances are deceiving. People will only tell you what they want you to know and edit out the bits they don't. Not everyone is happy all the time

    Angel x

    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
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    not everything is perfect, I just dont like to talk about bad things in public. I was hurted badly in past by people and I just keep everything in bad and I dont talk about it, because I would feel like I am bothering people (purely mine psychological problem). I may write it down on paper, but I very rarely would say anything before people. But I did in the past asked for advice on something which was problematic. Nothing is perfect.

    I hope you feel better soon, anything we can help with?

    Noon [sign in to see picture]
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    Lots of people on here have some tough things going on, some share more than others but the wealth of support available if good.

    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    I think a lot of people keep negativity off the forums - not least because a lot of people don't want to put dampners on others (not that they should worry about such a thing)!

    We all have problems - and I think one benefit of many users of the forums is that people are quite open minded and learn how to be communicative with their partners which means issues don't become big problems :)

    The forums are great for advice though - many people have had improved relationships from the collective advice, or just being able to talk freely without worries of judgements which can be quite cathartic and I'm sure plenty of people who don't talk about the things that worry them get benefits from the previous threads and advice!


    ghostgirl [sign in to see picture]
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    Dirty Red Angel wrote:

    What makes you want to cry in particular? Because your partner doesn't do anything like this? Whats wrong?

    Always remember appearances are deceiving. People will only tell you what they want you to know and edit out the bits they don't. Not everyone is happy all the time

    Angel x

    ^^ this

    and to balance there a lot of people on here who dont have partners or who are unhappy with aspects of their relationship. I am lucky that I have a very supportive OH as at the moment I am at the beginning of treatment for depression, stemming mainly from the death of my husband

    This forum can be a really good place to get support and advice, if that is what you need then please give us some more details so that we can help



    Gyrator53 [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm very sorry to hear that you feel like that. I have not had time to read all your posts but from what I have read so far you are clearly in a very difficult situation. All I can say is that even the best of relationships can go through such difficult periods. My own marriage, wonderful as it now is, went through a period where we could barely bring ourselves to talk to each other and, had it not been for counselling, I believe it would have ended badly some 27 years ago.

    It will be very hard but I think you both need to set aside the pain you have caused each other and try to reach a new understanding if you can (or, if that fails, draw a line under the relationship in the knowledge that all avenues were explored). I doubt you will be able to do this without some counselling as, without a neutral referee it's impossibly hard to listen to the things each other needs to say and have heard.

    Good luck.

    jaycloth [sign in to see picture]
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    Never mind.

    Lady Ness [sign in to see picture]
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    sometimes I find the forum very hard to cope with, it's the same as in real life. You see people around you who seem to be doing ok even during the bad times and you can wonder sometimes 'why can't I cope like that'. It's very rare I'm actually happy due to my health, and it's very rare I find much enjoyable in my life, it's been like that since a very young age. Even though I find it harder to cope with a lot of things than some people, I believe the best thing to do is still not discuss it within a public or social enviroment, I'm not saying that you have to trap your emotions and thoughts away but sometimes it's just best to keep quiet. I feel most people on the forums do this. Sometimes we all have breakdowns and you will come across a thread or two, but personally when one has a true break down there isn't much advice anyone can give, so my approad is to keep it to myself once again and avoid certain disscussions.

    There's countless of threads regarding mental health and depression within the forum, I avoid these. If I was to reply to those threads I would go off on one. It's because a lot of people advise on medication that's incorrect, therapies they have no clue about, some state what is actually wrong with you (I believe this is very wrong)... this just annoyes me in all hoinesty, my fault really because psychology, psychiatry, and neurology, are my strong points, I've studied a lot into these areas through courses, hobbies, teaching, and personal experience. So that one of the things within the forums that gets to me, though some people will use there knowledge in similar threads and will be rather harsh when telling someone when they are wrong, so sometimes I wonder why I bother holding back. Yes information when correct is great but you have to put it across in a nicer way... anyway slight mini rant.

    But yes at times the forums can be depressing, but then there are times they are very easy to cope with, and then you get those 'meh' days where nothing good or bad comes from any of the topics. Guess it just depends how you portray the world. So I don't think it's everyone making the forums out to be perfect, it's more with how you see things.

    Maybe next time you come on the forums you will see it in a different way.

    toycar69 [sign in to see picture]
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    Hugs from me to everyone here who is feeling down today.

    I think others have mentioned already, but you may be in more company on here having issues with your partner than you think. Dig around a little and I'm sure you can find lots of threads where people are asking for advice to get over / past things or how to cope.

    Sometimes it can be depressing to see everyone else having fun when you aren't. When I'm in that kind of mood I tend not to post.

    Whatever the issues are, I wish you good luck.



    [suspended user]

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    hey ,everybody who feels a bit down just think of all the good things i bet they outwiegh the bad,well i hope they do and smle your alive and kicking .So go out and kick some ass or just have fun in the sun BE HAPPY DON'T WORRY xxxlmd and i hope the chat's back soon so we can all get back on track

    Seduced [sign in to see picture]
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    jaycloth wrote:

    Never mind.

    Come on chap, Vent a bit if you need to, Don't give up that quickly.

    Life has its ups and downs and if it makes you feel any better, You're not alone, My relationships intimacy has gone straight out the window again the last 6 months when things WERE looking so positive...

    Dont worry everyone, Me and J are ok :) , Just a lot of outside factors hitting us hard lately! Her health being a big part.

    So reading stuff on here sometimes gets me down, But i stick it out because ive made some of my closest friends on here and would miss seeing their online presence after a short while!

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