• Self-photography

    1303856799
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    They look really good Cuddly Hubby! And I'm not just saying that! The black and white and lighting really works and the poses are really natural and masculine!

    Adx

    1303860490
    Cuddly Hubby [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm genuinely touched by those compliments -- thanks! I wasn't fishing for them (I didn't expect anyone even to bother following my Flickr link), and that makes them even nicer to receive. I haven't felt this good about my body for... well, as long as I can remember.

    To those who have viewed my photos: can you suggest anything that I could tastefully adopt as my new user photo? Please let me know if so -- many thanks!

    I'll report back in due course on my wife's reaction. I need to get the photos printed (including the naughtier ones -- perhaps I'd better borrow a photo printer and do this myself!) and find a good way to present them to her, maybe in a little album with a padlock and key.

    P.S. Jake of Facts and Friction: thanks for your suggestion.

    1303861235
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    Cuddly Hubby wrote:

    I'm genuinely touched by those compliments -- thanks! I wasn't fishing for them (I didn't expect anyone even to bother following my Flickr link), and that makes them even nicer to receive. I haven't felt this good about my body for... well, as long as I can remember.

    To those who have viewed my photos: can you suggest anything that I could tastefully adopt as my new user photo? Please let me know if so -- many thanks!

    I'll report back in due course on my wife's reaction. I need to get the photos printed (including the naughtier ones -- perhaps I'd better borrow a photo printer and do this myself!) and find a good way to present them to her, maybe in a little album with a padlock and key.

    P.S. Jake of Facts and Friction: thanks for your suggestion.

    I'm glad you're feeling confident. It really is a massive boost having some great photos to feel proud of and showing them here has helped a lot of us gain confidence (see my pink fishnet photos? Not too long ago I wouldn't have had the guts to show people photos displaying just how flat chested I am but now I'm happy with it :D)!

    We do joint photo sessions and I'm always thrilled with the results :D

    I think they'd all work - all pretty tasteful and well taken. Very good profile photo material if you ask me!

    Photo album is a good idea. For future photos - something that went down really well with me was when my OH took photos of him into increasing states of undressing and sent me them sequentially via text....like an electronic strip tease!

    Adx

    1303861470
    *Emma* [sign in to see picture]
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    Im rather the same and self conscious and shy about my body. Seriously lack confidence after years of being told im fat and ugly by an evil ex, although i am getting better and coming out of my shell quite a lot now that im happy and have a great understanding man who i love dearly. I tend to take pics in front of a mirror with my mobile or with my webcam. x

    1303861972
    wettongues [sign in to see picture]
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    Cuddly Hubby, you have nothing to feel unconfident about, you have a lovely body! I bet your wife will be thrilled with the photos. I like AD's idea of a textual strip teast, maybe ending with her finding you in bed ready and waiting one time.

    But I m with emma here, an evil ex made me feel totally unconfident in my own skin, I have worked hard on my own self image, and shocked myself by putting up my profile pic. Its been a year in the making, now I'm thinking of some self portrait ones, just for myself, well amd maybe a select few.

    I'm a bum girl, so I would tell you to go with the bum shot, but thats just me.

    1303926025
    Cuddly Hubby [sign in to see picture]
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    Well.... there's an experience in common! My self-consciousness about my body stems from unkind comments made by women that I dated early on. I won't bore you with the details, but suffice it to say that it's taken me until now to start feeling more confident again, Of course, my wife regularly tells me that she loves my body, but when you've taken knocks in the past, it's difficult to avoid the sneaking suspicion that she just has to say that. It's hard for me to express how grateful I feel to receive unsolicited but believable compliments from strangers with no axe to grind. I'm still not having any delusions that I'm a male model, but I'm now prepared to believe that I have some visual appeal. Thanks for that.

    I found it especially difficult to receive knocks in this area because, in my eyes, it's very difficult for someone of either sex to look ugly, unless they're just not making any effort at all. I'd certainly never describe anyone as "ugly", unless perhaps they were deliberately aiming for this look! Real people always have real imperfections. It annoys me that a lot of women in particular seem to dwell on a few points about themselves that they don't like when they have vastly more other things about themselves that they could celebrate. If they did so, then they'd probably find that the few "negative" points wouldn't be noticed even if observers were asked point-blank about them.

    With this in mind, and for what it's worth:

    Alicia: I took a look at some of your photos. They are great indeed! And I'm not just saying that! I hope you don't mind me thinking out loud that, with legs like yours (especially in those fishnets!), only a bloke who's fixated on breasts would notice or care about your relatively modest chest.

    *Emma*: I checked out your photos as well, and I see plenty there to like (including more lovely legs!). Why not consider taking more -- you don't need to post them here! Would your OH be prepared to act as photographer and director? Might you both enjoy a little role play in which you're a star/glamour model who has to pose for him, and you therefore have to put aside your self-consciousness and shyness?

    wettongues: I only have your little profile pic to go on, but it looks great as far as I can see! Given your past experiences, I think it's really encouraging that you posted it at all and that you're now considering taking some more. Please do go ahead and take some just for yourself. If you'd like a sympathetic outside opinion on them, then I think you know you can ask!

    A few other specifics:

    Alicia D'amore wrote:

    Photo album is a good idea. For future photos - something that went down really well with me was when my OH took photos of him into increasing states of undressing and sent me them sequentially via text....like an electronic strip tease!

    I like that idea!

    There are some practicalities that I'll need to sort out for it to work, though.

    wettongues wrote:

    I'm a bum girl, so I would tell you to go with the bum shot, but thats just me.

    I'm flattered, but I think that might be a bit too "out there" and give newcomers the impression that I'm a shameless exhibitionist!

    1303931881
    wettongues [sign in to see picture]
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    wettongues wrote:

    I'm a bum girl, so I would tell you to go with the bum shot, but thats just me.

    I'm flattered, but I think that might be a bit too "out there" and give newcomers the impression that I'm a shameless exhibitionist!

    nah they would just think you are a very confident person, there is nothing wrong with that. Keep trying to find a quiet moment to take some photos, but this house is too busy!!

    1303951851
    Mr Monster [sign in to see picture]
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    Cuddly Hubby wrote:

    wettongues wrote:

    I'm a bum girl, so I would tell you to go with the bum shot, but thats just me.

    I'm flattered, but I think that might be a bit too "out there" and give newcomers the impression that I'm a shameless exhibitionist!

    Well, we have regular "theme months" on the forums, for those that are brave enough to join in. I think you just missed the Arse Revolution, where lots of people changed their forum picture to a self-taken shot of their rear! (All tastefully done, of course, and within the forum rules!) I even joined in myself, which is the most anyone here's seen of the real me.

    The responses were universally positive and supportive, even for those of us who might not be in the best of shape, or those who are but just can't see it. I think I fall somewhere between those two categories, actually!

    Anyway, my point is that nobody started thinking "shameless exhibitionist". Even if they did, who cares? You're unlikely to scare off anyone worth knowing because of a risqué forum pic. If anything, it's a conversation starter...

    All the best,

    Mr Mr

    1304101092
    Cuddly Hubby [sign in to see picture]
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    @ wettongues and Mr Monster: Thanks for your reassurance. It occured to me later that the photo is rather an appropriate one in another way, as it shows me cuddling a pillow on our bed in the absence of my wife at that time, as you'd expect from my user name! Although I am naked in it, I'm on my front and nothing more risqué than my bum is on display, which appears to be fine under the photo rules. So, maybe I'll put it up and hope for the best!

    I've just given my wife the photos of myself. I wanted to present them in a more romantic way than just putting them on a computer screen, so I borrowed a photo printer and turned them into 6" x 4" prints, which I then put into a photo album that I tied up with red ribbon and presented to her with a sheepish smile.

    I was fearful that my efforts would be greeted with a frown, or blushing silence, but my earlier prediction turned out to be right on the mark. My wife gave her dirty laugh, and turned through the pages of the album with enthusiasm. She feigned her "innocent and shocked" expression at the most risqué ones, but I wasn't fooled by that. When my wife reached the end of the album, she slapped me playfully, then grinned with approval and roared with even dirtier laughter.

    My wife has filed the album in her secret bedroom drawer for further inspection in the future. So... the job's done and it's a success! I couldn't have done it, though, without the support and encouragement from people in this thread. Many thanks again for that.

    1304116505
    wettongues [sign in to see picture]
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    So glad she liked it, what a pleasing result :)

    1305128916
    wettongues [sign in to see picture]
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    hmm I've tried!!

    I've added it to my profile as a flickr account

    I have to say I have gained more and more confidence, especially about my body over the last few weeks.

    1305129470
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    I really like the two from the side and the one on your front with your knee up to the side!

    Looking good lovely!

    Adx

    Oh and well done! Yay for growing confidence!

    1305130608
    wettongues [sign in to see picture]
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    Alicia D'amore wrote:

    I really like the two from the side and the one on your front with your knee up to the side!

    Looking good lovely!

    Adx

    Oh and well done! Yay for growing confidence!

    Thank you!

    It helps when you get feed back. hence why I posted on here, keeps them all together so to speak. Sorry Cuddly Hubby, I think Ive hijacked a thread, but thought it might give others the confidence to do the same, esp if they can see the feedback from others.

    You wouldn't believe how unconfident I have been for years about my body, yes I have a tummy and flabby arms, but no one would ever know due to the poses and clothes/lingerie, although I did end up with a few unflattering ones, I wouldn't let them see the light of day!!



    1305132611
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    wettongues wrote:

    Alicia D'amore wrote:

    I really like the two from the side and the one on your front with your knee up to the side!

    Looking good lovely!

    Adx

    Oh and well done! Yay for growing confidence!

    Thank you!

    It helps when you get feed back. hence why I posted on here, keeps them all together so to speak. Sorry Cuddly Hubby, I think Ive hijacked a thread, but thought it might give others the confidence to do the same, esp if they can see the feedback from others.

    You wouldn't believe how unconfident I have been for years about my body, yes I have a tummy and flabby arms, but no one would ever know due to the poses and clothes/lingerie, although I did end up with a few unflattering ones, I wouldn't let them see the light of day!!

    This is why I post all my photos - I know how many people are insecure at the other end of the scale too - skinny and flat chested I've not got a classically nice figure, but if I can 1) have the guts to put photos up (used to be crushingly insecure about my figure and boobs to the point where I was physically sick the first time the OH touched them due to nerves and fear) and 2) look pretty darn good in them due to clever outfits/camera angles/lighting then it proves that others can look great and feel proud too!!

    And of course the positive feedback really does do wonders!

    We need more people of all shapes and sizes to have the confidence to show their body parts (nude or clothed or just little snippets like your current profile piccie) so we can see that we're all different but we can all look good!

    Adxx

    1305133444
    puss [sign in to see picture]
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    Speaking for myself I hated my body for a long time. Taking photos myself and with my ex made me grow so much in confidence. That I love doing photos now.

    Only tip I can give is to really enjoy doing them and take lots and lots always some really good ones then.:)

    1305137144
    Cuddly Hubby [sign in to see picture]
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    wettongues wrote:

    It helps when you get feed back. hence why I posted on here, keeps them all together so to speak. Sorry Cuddly Hubby, I think Ive hijacked a thread, but thought it might give others the confidence to do the same, esp if they can see the feedback from others.

    You certainly haven't hijacked a thread! That's exactly what it's here for. I wasn't expecting it to be all about me.

    I'm really glad that you've felt brave enough to post some photos -- and I think you've made a great start! I particularly like your fifth photo (kneeling and facing forward). It's a sexy and tantalising pose, and shows off your curvaceousness very well. Great outfit as well! I see that you're wearing stockings with seams.

    Alicia D'amore wrote:

    This is why I post all my photos - I know how many people are insecure at the other end of the scale too - skinny and flat chested I've not got a classically nice figure, but if I can 1) have the guts to put photos up (used to be crushingly insecure about my figure and boobs to the point where I was physically sick the first time the OH touched them due to nerves and fear) and 2) look pretty darn good in them due to clever outfits/camera angles/lighting then it proves that others can look great and feel proud too!!

    I think it's a shame when women say this. When I look at a photo, I don't think "that would have been good if only she had a classical figure". Instead, I notice lots of things that I like, regardless of different shapes and sizes. That's the opposite of the self-critical process of looking for a few things that you don't like.

    Anyway, I don't see anything not to like. :)

    puss wrote:

    Speaking for myself I hated my body for a long time. Taking photos myself and with my ex made me grow so much in confidence. That I love doing photos now.

    That's great to hear! I've had a similar experience with my wife, who has grown similarly in confidence after being completely camera-shy.

    I feel as if I'm on a bit of a mission here now. I don't think I've ever said anything roundly negative about the subject of a photo. I might notice that the lighting is dodgy, or the camera angle isn't the best, or that an outfit is unflattering, but the subject is the subject.

    I hope that other people feel encouraged to post photos if they want to. One of the benefits of this forum is that people are relative strangers without an axe to grind, so any feedback is likely to be honest (but honestly positive as well).

    1305139753
    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    Cuddly Hubby wrote:

    I think it's a shame when women say this. When I look at a photo, I don't think "that would have been good if only she had a classical figure". Instead, I notice lots of things that I like, regardless of different shapes and sizes. That's the opposite of the self-critical process of looking for a few things that you don't like.

    Anyway, I don't see anything not to like. :)

    I used to be very insecure - now I'm just realistic - I'm not "classically" attractive but that doesn't mean I'm not attractive. I might not have the figure that's fashionable right now (though I have a figure similar to old Greek statues with my high hips and small boobs) but I think I'm alright - I like imperfections and hate fashionable things so I guess it's good that I'm a bit imperfect.

    I'm realistic though - whether someone notices or not I *do* have small breasts and dumpy legs - they are facts, but that doesn't mean they can't be attractive small breasts or interesting shaped legs ;)

    A great thing to do for a woman is to when out and about look at every woman you think is stunning and look for one thing that's not perfect (you know the one thing she probably thinks everyone else is aware of) then think back to before you forced yourself to do that and had you noticed? Of course not! We don't notice imperfections on people - we're too busy noticing (or feeling jealous of) the good bits so noone else will notice your own imperfections!

    Adx

    1305141993
    Cuddly Hubby [sign in to see picture]
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    I found myself nodding in agreement with everything that you wrote there. I'd only add that you're entitled to like your breasts or legs just the way they are, without needing to compare them to anyone else's. I'm willing to bet that your OH thinks that way. Certainly, I love the way that my wife looks, and I wouldn't want to change anything about her even if it were possible. I encourage my wife to acknowledge and make the most of her many assets, and I enjoy finding her new items to wear that accentuate these (even though some of them don't make it out of our bedroom!). I don't think these are the actions of a husband who keeps noticing deficiencies in his wife's appearance compared to some ideal.

    (So there! Sorry to bang on about this )

    1305143043
    Dirty Red Angel [sign in to see picture]
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    I typed a big long response - and lost it so here's the abbrev version

    I can't view your flickr pics (as I don't have an account) but I just wanted to say judging from people's reactions - well done! What a lovely thoughtful idea and kudos on the confidence to do it.

    I don't have much confidence with my body at the minute because I'm a little overweight - funny how we all compare. Myself and Ad have had a similar conversation so I'm sure she won't mind me saying but I look at her pic and wish I was as svelte as she is! My boobs are the favourite part of my body but the rest of me

    Yet neither my OH or another partner cared about my wobbly bits or my bum. They just see/saw the whole package.

    An insight into how I think -

    Sex doggy style from behind. Whilst quite hot -

    I'm thinking I hope he isn't looking at my wobbly orange peel arse.

    He's probably simply thinking - fuck yeah!

    1305144902
    Cuddly Hubby [sign in to see picture]
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    Dirty Red Angel wrote:

    I typed a big long response - and lost it so here's the abbrev version

    I can't view your flickr pics (as I don't have an account) but I just wanted to say judging from people's reactions - well done! What a lovely thoughtful idea and kudos on the confidence to do it.

    Thanks! Sorry to hear that you lost your original response.

    I felt the need to give my photos a "moderate" rating as there's some partial nudity (albeit well within the LH photo rules). That means that Flickr requires people to log in to prove that they're old enough to view them.

    Dirty Red Angel wrote:

    I don't have much confidence with my body at the minute because I'm a little overweight - funny how we all compare. Myself and Ad have had a similar conversation so I'm sure she won't mind me saying but I look at her pic and wish I was as svelte as she is! My boobs are the favourite part of my body but the rest of me

    I think you two need your heads banging together!

    You probably won't be surprised to hear me say that you both look great to me, judging from your user photos. You may be different shapes, but even if I could tell that, it wouldn't occur to me to compare or contrast you both. As you say, it's the overall impression of the whole package that counts.

    *shrugs* Am I wrong?

    Dirty Red Angel wrote:

    He's probably simply thinking - fuck yeah!

    I can't speak for your OH, but I think you've probably nailed it there!

    In any case, doggy position always makes lots of bits wobble -- it's all part of the fun! If you're really concerned, then you could try doing it in front of a mirror so that your OH can make eye-contact with you (to me, the difficulty in making eye-contact is the biggest drawback of doggy).

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