Girls help - What am i doing wrong.

great advice there peeps well done girls does anyone rate the book "men are from mars women are from venus" ?

Think I read it many years ago Studley, but too long ago to remember any significant details, so can't really comment.  But I have, in more recent times, read "Why Men Don't Listen, and Women Can't Read Maps", which is good fun, and makes some good points.  It is based in science, but it's pretty "lite" if you know what I mean.  But a worthwhile read none the less, as it does encourage you to understand the opposite sex a little better

So how do get oldham ? WB (hold them) he he

It would appear that i'm not that great at putting things into words.  All the things that i put in my last post i have always done but in the past week or so i've started to do even more and i'll continue to do this until the situation improves and beyond.  I'm pretty confident that i do my fair share around the house and always have done, if this is a problem then she will tell me and when she does i apologise and raise the bar again.

I wasn't looking for a rollicking just a little of advise

 As a personal opinion, I think the difficulties you are describing in your relationship are unlikely to be solved solely with a little advice, unfortunately.  I think a whole lot more is needed than can be covered here.

So, if all you wanted was a little advice, then I think this thread already has plenty to choose from.  If, however, you want to identify the actual problem, make some significant and tangible improvements to your relationship and your life, and have more sex as a bonus extra feature,  then I don't think a little advice will cover it.

I hope that you get it sorted out one way or another.

Best regards,

Lubyanka.

Lubyanka wrote:

 As a personal opinion, I think the difficulties you are describing in your relationship are unlikely to be solved solely with a little advice, unfortunately.  I think a whole lot more is needed than can be covered here.

So, if all you wanted was a little advice, then I think this thread already has plenty to choose from.  If, however, you want to identify the actual problem, make some significant and tangible improvements to your relationship and your life, and have more sex as a bonus extra feature,  then I don't think a little advice will cover it.

I hope that you get it sorted out one way or another.

Best regards,

Lubyanka.

you rock hun

To add my point of view from the female side:

1) Yes sex for most women is mainly in the mind but not always

2) This guy seems to have done most of the right things ie talking , laying off, suggesting different approaches. His wife has to be more proactive herself and not keep pushing him away. Even if it is not pentrative sex mutual masturbation is a good place to start rather than self entertainment ( which is also great btw )

3) There is no point portioning out blame that will immediately makes the situation worse especially if one of you is sulky.

The fact that you tried two ideas ie the vibe and the porn video which worked short term could mean two things.

a) Your wife wants variety or perhaps more extreme forms of sexual pleasure than you have tried before. Have you asked her what she likes about porn ? how about making a home made one with a videocamera ! that often works a treat and is a big turn on if you play it back when sex is going a bit stale in the future

b) Or she is trying to accomodate you but didn't really like either experience much in which case you need to suggest something else.

Why not open up the lovehoney site on a browser and get her to pick a sex toy for her and one for you. For example a strapon kit is a good way to start as it can be a shared experience for you both ie the same sex experience if you both want to try anal.

Hope this helps ,tell us how you get on. Give us a few more details about how things are and I might be able to help more.