• please help

    wetpussy [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 8 Jun 2010

    please help. i went away for the weekend and when i came home i couldnt keep my hands of my hubby. iwent into hospital for a small operation in july and since i cant get back the sex life me and hubby had before my op. weve tried everything to get things back to how they was.

    we used to txt each other wot we was going to do to each other but we dont even do that now.

    we really want our sex life back to how it was and we r open to any suggestions.

    thanx for yr help.

    chels18 [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 18 May 2010


    What op did you have? (if you don't mind me asking) Is it because of the op that you dont have sex or because you have both fallen out of the swing of things following your recovery...?

    As an idea...Maybe try not having sex... just talk about it - look at sexy stories together, talk about sex toys, text about what you'd like your partner to do to you (as an encouragement to him) and about memories you both have of when sex was amazing (in a sexy way not in a "remember when..." way) - and when you both feel turned on... don't let anything happen. Tease yourselves for a while and it might relight your labido.

    I had an op in june and the look of the scar really puts me off sex as it makes me dislike my body... so if its something like that - try addressing it??


    Starlight* [sign in to see picture]
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    Hey Sorry to hear about your problem. I think Chels has raised a good point... Perhaps it would be a good idea to focus on the aspect of sex- talk about having it, but don't actually have it. That way you're building up the suspense, and perhaps then you will really want it. Do you own many sex toys in your relationship? Perhaps it would be a good idea to introduce something new into your relationship. And, if it has been a while since you have had sex with your OH, perhaps it now seems like a huge effort and the more you leave it the more afraid you are getting? I'd suggest planning a special night, where the two of you can completely embrace each other. Why not have a nice relaxing bath together, give each other massages, and enjoy each others company, whilst exploring each other's bodies in a non-sexual way?

    If you try all this and it doesn't work, i'd perhaps suggest speaking to a GP, to see what they can suggest. They may have information about your operation which could effect the extent to which you want sex.

    Good luck xx

    wetpussy [sign in to see picture]
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    i had a gastric bypass. i think to be honest by the time i had recovered the kids were on the school holidays so i think im stressed with them being at home. the scars dont bother me and i know they will fade in time . god the sex was amazing before my op. before i went away for the weekend our sex life was soo boring but i missed hubby so much that on the way home i told him wot i wanted to do to him when i got in

    think i need to go away again !!!

    diamonds [sign in to see picture]
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    i had an op done this year in april, and im still finding that my sex life hasnt gone back to how it was, its getting there but i still get very tired and some off days where my body is remiding me that i still need to take it a bit easy!

    youve had a major op you need to give your body some time to get it self settled and get used to the big shock that its had to the system, it will all come back in time you just need to take baby steps with every thing.


    chels18 [sign in to see picture]
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    Gastric Bypass is a big op! My mum had something similar a few years back and she's still tender... Maybe your hubby is worried about how it will affect you???

    I find the best way to spice up my sex life is teasing and the art of suggestion.... a weekend away, maybe to have yourself pampered sounds like a plan...you can come back feeling sexy and get your sex life back on track :)


    Seduced [sign in to see picture]
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    Pampering yourselves sounds like a great idea! Thumbs up Chels ;)

    I think maybe a naked yet non-sexually fueled massage could help?!

    Just being with each other sensually without the suggestion or inevitability of penetration could help to bring things back on track.

    I myself am having to learn that my OH and me need sensuality & Foreplay more, And penetration less.

    And if you are going to get positivly sexed up, Maybe concentrate on clitoral stimulation, Masterbation etc.

    Maybe I'm blabbering, But I do hope I'm helping?!

    'P' ;)

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