• Do you need to know?

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    Heart2Heart [sign in to see picture]
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    Personally i think when your get settled in the relationship and want to think about not using condoms or your just curious, its important that you know if they have any STD's as many people won't exactly openly ask or tell you at the start of your first date and so on xD

    I think on issues on past relationships personally i hate it when a Girlfriend is talking to me about her past boyfriends, this just gets on my nervs, as if shes comparing me to them, only time i would want to know about past boyfriends is if something really bad happened and she wanted to not let it happen again, or if she wanted to try something that her other boyfriends would not do etc. etc.

    xD

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    [suspended user]

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    Aimee wrote:

    I think it's perfectly accpetable to ask someone how many parteners they have had :) But anything else should be a 'no go area' like names, places or things they've done! apart from respecting privacy who would really want to know the finer details?! Everyone else is in the past for a reason. The Here and now is what's important :)

    Precisely Aimee that last sentence sum's it all up

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    sweetcherry24 [sign in to see picture]
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    It doesnt matter to me how many sexual partners my OH has had. And ive never asked. What is important is if they have had any STD's and how often they get tested.

    Whats everyone should come with is there mot certificate lol. Yes you may use condoms at first, but what happens when you both get very serious about each other and want to stop using condoms. how do you know for sure that they aint got or had anything, other than take there word for it.

    And not forgetting Condoms do not protect you from every STD out there.

    I myself get tested every 6 months and normaly have my STD certs done aswell. piece of mind and knowing that im 100% clean other than the odd bout of thrush.

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    [suspended user]

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    sweetcherry24 wrote:

    It doesnt matter to me how many sexual partners my OH has had. And ive never asked. What is important is if they have had any STD's and how often they get tested.

    Whats everyone should come with is there mot certificate lol. Yes you may use condoms at first, but what happens when you both get very serious about each other and want to stop using condoms. how do you know for sure that they aint got or had anything, other than take there word for it.

    And not forgetting Condoms do not protect you from every STD out there.

    I myself get tested every 6 months and normaly have my STD certs done aswell. piece of mind and knowing that im 100% clean other than the odd bout of thrush.

    Well done cherry you set a good example to others if only they would too

    1284039260
    Mr Trinity [sign in to see picture]
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    it has only seemed to cause arguments with me and my OH when we talk about our past sex lives, but we have told eachother most things now and we feel so comfortable around eachother, we find it much more exciting when we both know were both trying something for the first time with eachother!

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    Alicia D'amore [sign in to see picture]
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    Loves huni wrote:

    for example if he turned round and said hed been with 20+ people i would definately be asking if he'd ever been tested (probably a lot less than 20 and id still be asking!)

    It only takes 1 - the number shouldn't make a difference, if someone has had sex with anyone, the should get tested before sleeping with someone else - even if they are wearing condoms.

    Adx

    1284064769
    CurlyCoupleWife [sign in to see picture]
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    Hubby & I have never given each other a figure although I would say we've discussed enough about our sex lives to be 99% sure about the other person's number. The important thing is we knew what the other had done by way of unprotected sexual acts & had performed sufficient checks at the doctors before putting the other at any risk.

    I don't really give a hoot to be honest: the only partner that matters to me now is my spouse & I know that none of my previous partners left me with anything nasty. I also know my husband would be able to say exactly the same. What does it matter if between us we've bedded 10 other people, 100 other people or 1000 other people? It doesn't change our current situation in the slightest.

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    shellyboo [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm of the opinon that it shouldn't be discussed. I think the only people who care are people who have an opinion about what's "too much" or "too few"... and if that's the case, whatever the number, it's going to cause arguments.

    If a guy asked me directly, or demanded to know my number, I wouldn't tell him. It shouldn't matter and for that reason I won't disclose it to them because I know their opinion of me would be affected. Similarly I don't ask them.

    I have shared my number with partners before because I knew I could trust them not to be judgemental. In my current relationship, I've been with a *lot* more people than my partner... and we're both fine with that. Of the two of us, I was the most freaked out because I thought he'd want to leave me eventually and go sow his wild oats -- but I know now that's not going to happen :)

    1316036240
    ShaftMaster [sign in to see picture]
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    I think it depends . . . it's not overly important, but if you grew up in a small town like me and my OH, you do get curious as to things that have happened with people you know.

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    Haywire [sign in to see picture]
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    I personally don't want to know my OH previous sexual relations.

    So that way I won't feel conscious about anything.

    Although on the otherhand, he likes to know about mine. And I tell him honestly. But I would never ask about his.

    xx

    1316104737
    humanrabbit [sign in to see picture]
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    In my previous relationship, I didn't want my partner to know the finer details about my past. However, she always "knew" there were things I wasn't telling her, so she never gave up asking. So when I finally admitted that I'd been dogging (once through curiosity) and had a threesome once, she constantly wondered what else I wasn't telling.

    In my next relationship, I will not hesitate to talk if asked about my past. I would also be keen to know something about my partners past.

    However, if my partner only wanted to give a brief outline, I would be happy with that and respect her wishes. I would expect her to do the same for me.

    If a couple are truly close, then I believe they will accept each others past and for some people, talking about previous experiences can even be a turn on!

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    sovereign [sign in to see picture]
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    I will admit i did want to know and some sexual history too, it can be fun to hear what our gf/bf has learnt and with who. My gf wasnt too high but it does help when you get into it that she wont be too shocked when you start doing something or ask if they interested in something inparticular.

    I would like to know if they had a sti history too.

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    Janny [sign in to see picture]
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    If the relationship gets really seriousI think it is important, because otherwise it will always sit in the back of your head

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