asphixia?

hi im knew to this and new with my old ex girlfriend if yuo know what i mean?lol. any way she told me the other night that she liked being asphixiated wen she was about to orgasm, i have vaguely heard of this before but would be very interested in hearing all of you experts share your views and techniques.mainly a safe and pleasurable way to go about it.

 Oh definitely be careful - OH nearly throttled me once!  NEVER AGAIN! 

Horny Pony wrote:

 Oh definitely be careful - OH nearly throttled me once!  NEVER AGAIN! 

Oh, HP... what a saucy pic! Very nice.

vrfrocket, I'm certainly no expert on the topic, but I have read a little about it. It's true that auto-erotic asphyxiation (solo play) is very dangerous, as if something goes wrong there's no-one there to help; but from what little I know I think that as a part of couples play it can be enjoyable if done safely and carefully.

The main precautions would be not to use ropes or ties or belts to restrict airflow - these can tighten and knot, and in a moment of panic would be hard to untangle. That could lead to some serious problems. I think the common practive is for one partner to use their hand to obstruct the airflow by putting pressure on the neck just under the chin, just lightly enough to cause some slight trouble breathing - the idea being that sexual sensation is heightened this way.

However, the MOST important thing is that you have a safeword AND a safe signal - because when you're being effectively choked you may not be able to speak. So a clear safeword (other than 'no' or 'stop') and a very clear, decisive hand signal (such as patting your head) need to be decided on before engaging in anything like this, so that if it gets too much or too uncomfortable, you can indictate to your partner to stop.

But, like I say, I've only read bits and pieces!

thanks shelly boo, i was intendimg it to be a thing between us not a solo effort. if any 1 else has any experiences or tips.have fun.

hi again, well, the other evening i was with my girlfriend and thought as we were having a good time i would have a go and held my arm across her chest just below her throat and pushed down a little,this must of been what she wanted because she puled me hard against her as she came. i will have to try it again this weekend hopefully and may report back again.

Me and the bloke use it quite often as foreplay. He uses the crook of his hand (between the thumb and first finger) to lightly choke me, never actually puts his hands round me (as yet! I'd love him to in time), so essentially I'm in control without being dominant lol. I can push into him as hard as I want, but also pull back should I need to. Helps learn how far you can go.

It's a slow process though- we tried to take it further a bit back, and although on paper I loved the idea, in practise I burst into tears (without any clue as to why- psychology is a strange thing) and ruined the session for us both. So we're building back up but much steadier now.

thanks crayola, this sounds like good advice, i will try this technique with her at the weekend if i get the chance, fingers crossed,lol.do you do it on its own as forplay or wen your near to cumming? wen we tried it i had been fingering her pussy and as she built up to orgasm thats wen i applied the pressure.

studley wrote:

Erotic asphyxiation refers to intentionally cutting off oxygen to the brain for sexual arousal. It is also called asphyxiophilia, autoerotic asphyxia, scarfing, kotzwarraism, or breath control play. A person engaging in the activity is sometimes called a gasper. The erotic interest in asphyxiation is classified as a http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraphilia in the http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diagnostic_and_Statistical_Manual of the http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Psychiatric_Association

On 22 November 1997, Hutchence was found dead in a http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sydney hotel room under suspicious circumstances. The coroner who performed his autopsy ruled his death a http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide. Some speculate his death was actually an accident, the result of http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autoerotic_asphyxiation. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/INXS#cite_note-15

Be carefull...

Studly this is all very confusing, your links arent too clear  

I don't think I would ever try asphyxiation. I was once strangled in Drama by accident during a preformance and the guy didnt realise what he was actually doing and it was quite traumatic. So for me, its a big no go!

vfrrocket2004 wrote:

thanks crayola, this sounds like good advice, i will try this technique with her at the weekend if i get the chance, fingers crossed,lol.do you do it on its own as forplay or wen your near to cumming? wen we tried it i had been fingering her pussy and as she built up to orgasm thats wen i applied the pressure.

We tend to use it mostly with fingering to build me to orgasm rather than to get me to peak. The bloke does it a lot right at the beginning of foreplay too, before any penetration (fingers or penis) has happened. I go crazy when he's being kissing me a stroking me getting me to the point when I'm really pushing up against him, and then going for the throat to hold me back while I fight to get closer. Nothing sexier than the teasing 'will he/ won't he?' kisses I get then.

We've tried it when I'm close to orgasm during sex too, but I'm that lucky bitch who orgasms at the drop of a hat, so I don't really feel any difference. It sometimes puts me off a bit too, although thats a focus thing I have personally, so probably nothing to do with the choking lol.

Mrs T does like me to place my left forearm across her throat while my right is busy tickling her fancy and l am busy nuzzling her neck and right earlobe- does this make me a pervert???

Tallboy

tallboy247 wrote:

Mrs T does like me to place my left forearm across her throat while my right is busy tickling her fancy and l am busy nuzzling her neck and right earlobe- does this make me a pervert???

Tallboy

In a word, yes.

(Joking, TB... you know I loves ya! It's not perverted at all.)

Shellyboo you do say the nicest things.... are you able to access Imelda's blogs yet???

Tallboy

I have practiced this before some time ago, I wouldn't reccomend throttling - it left me feeling very ill and you can damage arteries and windpipe. A very erotic way of breath control is with your mouth - cover hers with yours and you breath for her, filling her lungs with breath that contains less oxygen, she has to relax and let you - you automaticly take in more air through your nose so neither of you are completely depleted.

You can start off with just a few seconds and increase a bit. She can in turn regain control if she has to and won't be in such danger. As always - play safe! I used to do this on occasion and it was quite a rush but everything in moderation and remember oxygen effects the brain so never cut it off completely or for too long - don't want a vegetable or corpse on your hands. It has happened before even in consenting couples playing with strangulation.

 Oooh we used to do that breathing for each other thing - must do it again!!!!  So sexy! 

Miss Kitty wrote:

I have practiced this before some time ago, I wouldn't reccomend throttling - it left me feeling very ill and you can damage arteries and windpipe. A very erotic way of breath control is with your mouth - cover hers with yours and you breath for her, filling her lungs with breath that contains less oxygen, she has to relax and let you - you automaticly take in more air through your nose so neither of you are completely depleted.

You can start off with just a few seconds and increase a bit. She can in turn regain control if she has to and won't be in such danger. As always - play safe! I used to do this on occasion and it was quite a rush but everything in moderation and remember oxygen effects the brain so never cut it off completely or for too long - don't want a vegetable or corpse on your hands. It has happened before even in consenting couples playing with strangulation.

i'm sure i heard the brain can go without oxygen for upto ten minutes with no harm caused, has any one seen the film flatliners ?

studley wrote:

i'm sure i heard the brain can go without oxygen for upto ten minutes with no harm caused, has any one seen the film flatliners ?

Sorry m'dear but flatliners is a fictional movie. Honestly if you kill a brain for that long there's not a lot of chance of coming back - also remember they use freezing the body and then using heat mats in that movie as though to simulate people that drown in ice cold water and then are revived long after a normal body would have perrished - this does happen on rare occasion.

I have been in coma's before for hours or days and didn't die but I have permanent damage from them - there is no point risking brain damage or death for a kick, even though people who do poppers risk just that - I've seen the results of abusing them first hand before anyone disagrees. Asphyxiation isn't childs play and people DO die from it on occasions so play safe, get the real facts and don't go by the drama movies.

This is why I would only do buddy breathing and not strangulation or completely cutting off the supply - if they die you will go to jail - consent or no consent, then you have to live with yourself after and they don't get to live at all.

Miss Kitty wrote:

studley wrote:

i'm sure i heard the brain can go without oxygen for upto ten minutes with no harm caused, has any one seen the film flatliners ?

Sorry m'dear but flatliners is a fictional movie. Honestly if you kill a brain for that long there's not a lot of chance of coming back - also remember they use freezing the body and then using heat mats in that movie as though to simulate people that drown in ice cold water and then are revived long after a normal body would have perrished - this does happen on rare occasion.

I have been in coma's before for hours or days and didn't die but I have permanent damage from them - there is no point risking brain damage or death for a kick, even though people who do poppers risk just that - I've seen the results of abusing them first hand before anyone disagrees. Asphyxiation isn't childs play and people DO die from it on occasions so play safe, get the real facts and don't go by the drama movies.

This is why I would only do buddy breathing and not strangulation or completely cutting off the supply - if they die you will go to jail - consent or no consent, then you have to live with yourself after and they don't get to live at all.

o'k I stand corrected !! Very good advice I think !! not my thing anyway !! I prefer to play safe Too !! 

studley wrote:

o'k I stand corrected !! Very good advice I think !! not my thing anyway !! I prefer to play safe Too !! 

Most welcome, I have played with some extremeties in the past and know many people who play with breath, cutting, needles, etc... and it is pretty much always lack of information or misunderstanding that causes edge play (or extreme play) to end badly. Fortunately my only ill experience of asphyxiation or anything else extreme was through having my throat squeezed, it caused passing out followed by a shaking fit and nausia as well as horrid almost hallucination while I was out - really bad experience. The buddy breathing always was good for me and I could claim back air if I felt I was going too far - it was actually once I got the air back I got the most rush!

Just an extra thought for those who like the idea of it but without any risks involved there are a few S&M soft games you can play such as...

Dominant forces recipient against a wall, hand to their throat as though holding them up there - a firm grip but not tight enough to throttle at all. Look them in the eye and tell them to be quiet as your other hand roves about their person doing what it wants.

Or have the recipient lie on the bed and dominant holds a scalf down over their throat, hands holding the scalf on each side of the neck resting on the bed - again enough to apply some preasure but not enough to hurt or cut off air - the scalf only over the front of the throat not wrapped around it.

These games still trigger something in the mind and that is the biggest sex toy possible. Also remember the arteries/veins are on the side front of the neck and not the front (about half way to the ear I think), also high up on the neck so that's the area to be most careful of - though of course be careful of the entire thing as it's a pretty delicate zone!

Have fun and play safe

Good advice MK!

I don't think we'll be going as far as full on can't breathe breath play. Just a little bit lol, like the wall idea. The time I burst into tears was from too much pressure, so we're working out the boundaries.

I can't see why anyone in this day and age does the whole cutting thing, in sex or in normal life. Self harmers are one of my few prejudices. No matter what people say to try to convince me otherwise, I think it's just become too faddy and most of the people who do it wouldn't even think about it had it not been publisised so much and such a big thing made out of it. Yes, some self harmers must genuinly feel thats the only solution- I know people who've been that bad- but still, I just want to give them a slap and tell them to grow the heck up.

Appollogies if I've offended anyone, but thats my view.