• Affairs

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    captainmeow [sign in to see picture]
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    I guess maybe think about this from your partner's perspective - how would she react to finding out about the affair? (And she will eventually find out, there's no hiding these things forever) Relationships aren't about pleasing yourself, a lot of it is learning how to genuinely love this other person in your life. If you want a more open relationship, I'd speak to her and gauge her interest. But I wouldn't pursue something I knew would hurt my partner, or that I wouldn't want done to myself :) Short-term pleasure just isn't worth the long-term regret.

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    lmh95 [sign in to see picture]
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    captainmeow wrote:

    Short-term pleasure just isn't worth the long-term regret.

    A huge +1 to this statement!
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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    lmh95 wrote:

    captainmeow wrote:

    Short-term pleasure just isn't worth the long-term regret.

    A huge +1 to this statement!

    I agree but what if you get caught in a moment of madness when say things arnt going to well and somebody gives you that chink of light? That is how some affairs start .They arnt all by design .

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    lmh95 [sign in to see picture]
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    mysteron wrote:

    lmh95 wrote:

    captainmeow wrote:

    Short-term pleasure just isn't worth the long-term regret.

    A huge +1 to this statement!

    I agree but what if you get caught in a moment of madness when say things arnt going to well and somebody gives you that chink of light? That is how some affairs start .They arnt all by design .

    I would hope that things would never get that far that I was tempted and flattered by someone else's attention enough to risk my relationship and that I would have the strength to walkaway from the situation and not give in to a "moment of madness" or weakness. If things weren't going well within my relationship then I would hope that we could discuss any problems and try to work together to sort things out and improve them. We discussed cheating a long time ago when it happened amongst our friends and my OH said "If you cheat, you're out, there's no second chance". That's his stance and I feel the same way. As much as I love him I would show him the door if he sneaked around, lied and cheated regardless of whether he did it just the once. I deserve much better than to be someone's back- up or second choice. I truly believe that if you don't want to be in a monogamous relationship with someone enough anymore and they don't want to be in an open relationship then you should set them free before you move onto your next conquest/'s.
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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    lmh95 wrote:

    mysteron wrote:

    lmh95 wrote:

    captainmeow wrote:

    Short-term pleasure just isn't worth the long-term regret.

    A huge +1 to this statement!

    I agree but what if you get caught in a moment of madness when say things arnt going to well and somebody gives you that chink of light? That is how some affairs start .They arnt all by design .

    I would hope that things would never get that far that I was tempted and flattered by someone else's attention enough to risk my relationship and that I would have the strength to walkaway from the situation and not give in to a "moment of madness" or weakness. If things weren't going well within my relationship then I would hope that we could discuss any problems and try to work together to sort things out and improve them. We discussed cheating a long time ago when it happened amongst our friends and my OH said "If you cheat, you're out, there's no second chance". That's his stance and I feel the same way. As much as I love him I would show him the door if he sneaked around, lied and cheated regardless of whether he did it just the once. I deserve much better than to be someone's back- up or second choice. I truly believe that if you don't want to be in a monogamous relationship with someone enough anymore and they don't want to be in an open relationship then you should set them free before you move onto your next conquest/'s.

    Good answer ! Just when I wanted to get this debate going !

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