• Sex lives

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    mamz [sign in to see picture]
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    Sorry redpanda if you took my comment personnaly.
    I didn't mean to sound like that (if I did) but yes, I do think men who can orgasm easily are closer to satisfaction than women who can't even orgasm at all.. That doesn't mean "well be glab you had an orgasm and stop whining" even if women often are told that they shouldn't expect to have an orgasm everytime and that they should appreciate the ride. I think that no one should settle for less than what they need to be satisfied because of things like that. Sorry I came across like that.

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    mamz [sign in to see picture]
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    But to be honest, as a woman I feel like it is harder for me to achieve satisfaction and it is frustrating. I wish my satisfaction was valued by society just as much as a man's is.

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    Redpanda69 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 28
    • Joined: 27 Jul 2016

    hey mamz, please don't worry. I rarely take things personally.

    I think in the last 20 years or so there has been more value placed on female orgasms - just look at this website and other shops that are on the high street. They'd never have existed when I was growing up. But yes, you're right, female satisfaction comes lower down.

    An old friend said that (one form of) true equality would come when women talked about masturbation as openly as men do. Perhaps that's the issue, women don't talk about it as much.

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    WoodynTina [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 16 Aug 2015

    Get him a plug n a pair of Knix 😄😄😄

    1470006967
    S&M sexy times [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
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    • Joined: 6 Oct 2010

    I would like to have a more active love life we have been together for over 15 years, we usually have some fun once or twice a week, only at weekends, as we both feel tired the day after a fun time & we both feel work is more important, her libdo is lower than mine it always has been, but I love her with all my heart and soul and couldn't imagine my life without her.

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    sugarboobies2232 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1544
    • Joined: 16 Feb 2015

    So glad to see im not alone.

    I always feel bad "asking" for sex. I often feel like he sees it as a chore. I will talk to him about it then things become wonderful for a couple of weeks then plummet. When he's on nights I'll send him pics of myself playing, toys im using etc. For example, I've just discovered Belladonna's magic hand - I cum so hard using it. I sent him a picture of it after I used it and I just got "looks like you're getting pretty handy with it" and that was it!

    I love him so much, sex aside everything is amazing. I can't imagine myou life without him yet can't imagine carrying on like this.

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    luvved up cupple [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 24 Oct 2012

    Speaking from experience sex in a long monogamous relationship can be a tricky subject. We've been there done that, not done that, etc. We went from a young couple at it whenever we could to living together doing it all over the flat. Bought a house, did up the house did it all over the house, then jobs, mortgage another move health issues, kids, job changes etc all played their part and then it was once in the week and weekends, then once in the week and maybe Sunday, then maybe once a week.

    And, yes. I (Mr) have a much higher drive than my wife and did go through the phase of thinking everyone else is getting it on and I'm lucky if we squeeze it in in the news break between Casualty and Match of the Day.

    A few discussions later we ironed out a few things and things are better now. Talking does wonders, I felt bad always initiating but explaining that it's not that I always want sex it's that I'm not getting sex, if I ask on Monday and it's no that's fine, Tuesday? You don't want to OK, Wednesday? No it's not that I always want it it's that I haven't had it for a week darling. You get the gist.

    We find we go through stages, usually affected by the weather, fortunately shopping here keeps things a little fresher as there is often something new to try.

    Hope this is of help and to everyone who feels it's only them having bedroom issues I would say it's more likely that we all will at some point. Talk it through, spend more non sexual time together (wherever possible) go on dates, walks and remember why you got together in the first place, who knows what or where it may lead..

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    Diggin parks [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 48
    • Joined: 8 Apr 2009

    I'm very lucky then me and Mrs Parks are very well matched, personally I'd love a quickie in the morning before work and a long session in the evening.

    Saying that I do know what it's like when you both get tired, you start taking it for granted. We both aim for once a day but in reality it's more like every other day, I don't know about anyone else I start getting grumpy without sex, if it's longer then a week i start acting like a bear with a sore head.

    We have been together for about 15 years and at the start it was the usual young love we couldn't keep our hands off each other and we was very experimental, unfortunately having the kids have slowed us down, because we do get tired quicker and don't get time to try new things as much.

    Anal sex used to be a part of our life but since the kids we don't get the quality time to prep and prepare properly so it gets shelved.

    Saying that I think it's a given you have to set time aside for each other, not only sex, it's as fun as just laying there kissing and touching, remember why you first got together in the first place.

    We are only in our early thirtys but I couldn't imagine not having sex any more, I'd feel bad for her only being left with my stupid humour and sarcastic banter.

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    Coralyn x [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 15
    • Joined: 3 Jul 2016
    wrote:

    I'm also 36 coralyn, have been with my hubby for 18 years and our situation is similar. I'm not too adventurous (yet!), but he definitely has a lower libido than I do which has caused us issues. The details in my intro post, as well as what I've done this week to try and improve things: http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/community/forums/introduce-yourself/1486714-roses-are-red/ Let me know if you ever want to talk about it!

    My partner suffers from PTSD.... Anxiety.... severe depression .... panic attacks ..... i hate moaning about him ... but injust feel so unloved... and forgotten i know sex and love are completely different ... and i too. Like you thought everyone else was having the time of their lives xx
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    Coralyn x [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 3 Jul 2016

    MondaySixteenth wrote:

    I'm really unsatisfied right now. My OH struggles with depression and anxiety and he's hardly sleeping so we hardly sleep in the same bed since he sleeps even worse when we share a bed.

    As regulars will know I enjoy frequenting fetish clubs but we haven't been to a night in months as he hasn't been up to it. I buy new toys and some he loves the look of but they just

    We still have sex occasionally but it's a quicky now and then and it's really getting me down. I asked him if he still wants to goto fetish clubs and he does he's just not been feeling up to it on the nights they're on. I don't go on about it to him as he's not happy about it either and obviously has it worse since he's the one whose suffering.

    Couple this with us both living with our respective parents and having jobs and it's even worse. :(

    Edit: Although this sounds really mean it's kind of comforting to see that other forumers are feeling unsatisfied too. A lot of the time I'm looking on forums thinking everyones out there having the best sex ever besides me but it's comforting to see that other couples are struggling too.

    My partner suffer PTSD... DEPREßION ... ANXIETY ... i hate moaning about him but im just so unhappy xx
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    Coralyn x [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
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    • Joined: 3 Jul 2016

    sugarboobies2232 wrote:

    So glad to see im not alone.

    I always feel bad "asking" for sex. I often feel like he sees it as a chore. I will talk to him about it then things become wonderful for a couple of weeks then plummet. When he's on nights I'll send him pics of myself playing, toys im using etc. For example, I've just discovered Belladonna's magic hand - I cum so hard using it. I sent him a picture of it after I used it and I just got "looks like you're getting pretty handy with it" and that was it!

    I love him so much, sex aside everything is amazing. I can't imagine myou life without him yet can't imagine carrying on like this.

    I say that to him all the time ... im getting fed of of asking for sex.... initiating it ... i want to FEEL WANTED.....
    1470087131
    Throbinhood [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 15 May 2016

    Think thats why Im currently single as my sex drive is off the scale, no previous partners could keep up with me ;)

    Id love it 24/7 and a few times a day if I could :)

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    MondaySixteenth [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 20 Jun 2014

    Coralyn x wrote:

    My partner suffer PTSD... DEPREßION ... ANXIETY ... i hate moaning about him but im just so unhappy xx

    It's just a horrible waiting game trying to get the right help and clinging onto the moments that we get where he is well. I wish you and your OH all the best. You guys considered couples counselling? x

    1470088082
    Terri JJ [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 20 Aug 2014

    To be honest I used to think I'd like it all day every day but in reality I wouldn't be able to cope with that. Our sex is so very intense that it usually takes me a few days to recover, both physically and mentally.

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    Coralyn x [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 15
    • Joined: 3 Jul 2016

    MondaySixteenth wrote:

    Coralyn x wrote:

    My partner suffer PTSD... DEPREßION ... ANXIETY ... i hate moaning about him but im just so unhappy xx

    It's just a horrible waiting game trying to get the right help and clinging onto the moments that we get where he is well. I wish you and your OH all the best. You guys considered couples counselling? x

    Not couples councilling .... but he is attending councilling tomorrow for him .... its horrible x
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    MondaySixteenth [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 20 Jun 2014

    Coralyn x wrote:

    MondaySixteenth wrote:

    Coralyn x wrote:

    My partner suffer PTSD... DEPREßION ... ANXIETY ... i hate moaning about him but im just so unhappy xx

    It's just a horrible waiting game trying to get the right help and clinging onto the moments that we get where he is well. I wish you and your OH all the best. You guys considered couples counselling? x

    Not couples councilling .... but he is attending councilling tomorrow for him .... its horrible x

    At least he's getting some help though. It's a rough time for both involved but hopefully it's helpful for him and for your relationship xx

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    JohnA [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 80
    • Joined: 12 Nov 2011

    We are very well matched. We sometimes have sex at night but more in the morning. We usually wake up to cuddles and go on to make love - that's the normal start to our day. Sounds too 'routine' to do it almost every morning (barring things like monthlies and one of us not feeling good) but it suits us fine and it gives us a nice warm feeling thinking back to it during the day.

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    PaulS [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 7 Jun 2016

    Pretty happy, we like to play often although she does like me to start it. Would be good if she started sometimes :)

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    hammy kinky couple [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 3 Sep 2015

    As a fella I could happily have sex every day all day, and get even kinkier if that is possible. My sex drive is higher, my wife's is good even with her health problems. I have no complaints we are very happy and love each other, at the moment I just have to remember
    My oh is not a sex machine, she is a person with feelings😍

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    dmaccd2 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 24
    • Joined: 15 Apr 2016

    Both my OH and I have very good sex lives. We both like to experiment and are trying new things, some we like, some we don't. I would like my OH to tie me up and just use me as she so wishes.
    Importantly we are both adults and both have feelings. We both respect each other which is very important.
    I do know what it is like to go without sex, as I went 6 years when my marriage ended. A sad feeling.

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