• Need some advice

    PocketSizeJo [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
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    • Joined: 30 Apr 2014

    Hi, so last tuesday i had my Nexplaton Implant (rod in my arm) removed due to it snapping at work. When I spoke to my Boyfriend about it he wasn't keen on my having a new one put in due to the side effects. So I had it remove competely and we've been using condoms since. Only thing is that my sex drive seem to have gone through the roof, and his seems to have crashed through the floor.

    So what I want to know is, is there anything that I can do to try and spice things up we've got toys and stuff but he just doesnt seem to be intrested as much anymore and it worries me a little. Any ideas are welcome and both men and womens opinions would be helpful. I've tried talking to him but he just doesn't really give me much insight.

    Sorry if its a bit too much info but i dont really know what else to do. Thanks in advance x

    Terri JJ [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 20 Aug 2014

    Your sex drive has probably increased due to your hormones not knowing what's going on at the moment, hopefully someone with experience of having an implant removed can advise you better.

    I'm wondering if your boyfriend is subconsciously worried about getting you pregnant now you've had it removed. A lot of men feel decreased sensation during sex when using condoms, so this could be why he appears to have gone of it.

    It sounds as though you need to have a chat about this together......and it's important that you listen to each other too xx

    glittergirl [sign in to see picture]
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    Im guess pregnancy fear may play a part or the condom de sensitising him so not so much joy maybe and my sex drive went through the roof to on removel think it must suppress drive . or mybe his hasn't decrease it just feels it coz your feeling like it more now?? But talk to him x

    Vanessa8 [sign in to see picture]
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    best thing I ever did was get off the pill, it killed my sex drive

    but I can also see where condoms may be affecting him a bit.

    talking to him is the best option.... but if you are just wanting to spice it up and get him more in the mood I say lingerie all the way, give him a lapdance, get him relaxed and take it from there.

    Young and fun95 [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 6 Jun 2014

    Could it just be that you want sex more so notice him not wanting sex more. Or that you're having too much in a short space of time so he doesn't need it for a little while? Like if he needs it three times a week and you want it every day, there's four days a week when you want it and he doesn't. So you can either have sex every other day or three days in a row then nothing for four days. Like you can eat cake a couple of days a weeks but if you had it every day you'd be sick of it within a couple of days

    Laveila [sign in to see picture]
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    Hormones can reduce the sex drive for women and even change their taste when it comes to men. It sounds weird, but I had friends saying that the pill/implant over time killed their sex drive. And when they came off, it went up immediately. What was for some worse is, that their partner scent started to irritate them after they went off the hormones and I believe some studies proved that the hormonal contraception, including implant, can have this effect on women.

    Also like some other said, it could be that the condoms are affecting him. Some men are not that sensitive and having condom added can bit make it even less sensitive for them.

    I guess you will need to talk to him to see what could be done. There are other ways to prevent pregnancy than just condoms and hormonal pills, so you may want to consult your doctor about other ways to prevent it. I have friend who used method which allows you to know what you are fertile. She used it for 10 years and the only pregnancy she had was a planned one. I have another friend who is combining this with spermicid creams to minimalize all risks.

    May be worth talking to doctor to find out what would work the best for you.

    matnem [sign in to see picture]
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    • Joined: 29 Jun 2008

    I had something very similar, my wife broke her leg (Femur) and was told in no uncertain terms that any hormones would negatively impact the repair. So straight off the hormones cold turkey.

    First off - hormone free is awesome. good for you, ride the high. BUT you will be on a bit of a rollercoaster for a bit. Things will (and do) even out.

    Secondly, there are many forms of contraception that do not contain hormone. Please contact your GP for a discussion. Condoms (obviously), the cup and the coil. We opted for the coil. I am convinced that I could feel it, but genuinely I'm 8.5" on a bad day and also probably making it up. It genuinely works. My wife had hers for about 2 years I think before we jointly decided to start a family.

    Third off, something else may be bothering your bf. I suggest that you get yourselves comfortable and discuss why his sex drive is off. When my partner and I were using condoms, this would (after a marathon) leave us both a litte dry and sore. E45 is a good solution here. Use it in the shower after washing - but be prepared for a dirtier looking shower/bath tray. Sometimes (rarely these days) if I've had a lot of sex I really have just had enough!

    Finally - try and find something that works for your bf so that you can get him on your schedule. Try getting new sexy lingerie, butt stuff, role play, dressing up, light bdsm - get him to talk about his fantasies and then introduce them.

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