• try new things but he doesn't HELP

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    jessrose91 [sign in to see picture]
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    me and my other half have great sex but it is always the same, and its getting quite boring. He isnt a fan of toys and wont try anything new. i dont really know how to go about trying to get him to try new things. Any help would be great.

    jess x

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    pusseypleaser [sign in to see picture]
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    What is the reason for his attitude?

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    jessrose91 [sign in to see picture]
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    Honeslty i dont have a clue, he doesnt mind using toys on me but extremly rearly and i to be the first to get them out but i took out a cock ring and he straight away shot it down.

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    Scorpius12 [sign in to see picture]
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    Hi Jess – Have you ever thought about playing a game together – I have this one, and can highly recommend it:

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=34381

    Also this one has some great reviews:

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=662

    I think a game can help because you will both get to experiment with different things, and will get more insight into what you both do and don't feel comfortable with. Then you can progress this from there :) xx

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    pusseypleaser [sign in to see picture]
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    What Scorplus 12 would help to break the ice. What things do you want to do together?

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    Alicia4Ever [sign in to see picture]
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    This is just a shot in the dark as you don't give much to go on but, many men feel that if a woman wants to use toys when he is around then she is making an affront on his ability to satisfy her without help; a cock ring is often used to help guys who can't keep it up; he probably feels if his mates found out he had used one the he would get called limppy.

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    jessrose91 [sign in to see picture]
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    im up to try anything dfferent really but im not sure what he wants tbh i think maybe we just need to talk more. we both have very stressful jobs i work shift patterens and nights so we dont always get chance to have time together.

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    jessrose91 [sign in to see picture]
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    he has not problem with keeping it up, and has no problem satifying me, its just always seems to be the same positions all the time and the same thing, yes i enjoy them but want to be a bit more adventours

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    Toys to some guys can have the effect of making them run to the hills. The guys on this forum are probably the exception .You could ask the reason why he objects ? And then discuss it.

    Without toys though sex doesn't have to be the same . You could always try different sex positions . Some of these we found quite fun and that was before Lovehoney . Lovehoney do a pack of playing cards with all the Kharma Sutra sex positions. Very cheap and my be worth picking up for ideas.

    Otherwise you best bet is to sit down perhaps over a meal and talk to see what direction both of you want to go in as regards sex. Communication is one of the main elements of a relationship .

    Another idea could be to introduce massage into the bedroom . Again books are available on the subject but again perhaps its worth discussing before rushing out to buy books. Lovehoney also stock a couple of superb books on this subject ,

    But first you both need to talk before frustrations start setting in .

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    pusseypleaser [sign in to see picture]
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    Yes talking will help. Also when you are going to have sex why not guide him to try a different position?

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    Alicia4Ever [sign in to see picture]
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    jessrose91 wrote:

    he has not problem with keeping it up, and has no problem satifying me, its just always seems to be the same positions all the time and the same thing, yes i enjoy them but want to be a bit more adventours

    I wasn't suggesting he had a problem satisfying you or keeping it up, only that in his mind using toys is upsetting his male ego, i,e, only used by men who can't finnish the job. reasure him thats not the case that you just want to add a new twist to your love making.

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    [suspended user]

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    jessrose91 wrote:

    Honeslty i dont have a clue, he doesnt mind using toys on me but extremly rearly and i to be the first to get them out but i took out a cock ring and he straight away shot it down.

    Start with that. Talk. Communication is the fundamental base of any relationship, sex included. Talk openly and honestly and reach a compromise. Where there's a will, there's a way. There are games (board or card ones) that can help with that (Lust comes to mind for example), or online / app based quizes you can both do and then compare results to talk about. But yes, talk, there is no way around that! :)
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    jessrose91 [sign in to see picture]
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    thanks guy for all the help and we have spoken breifly over text in the last hour or so and are on the samw wave lengh and both want to change and try new things we are going to talk tonight when he is home from work :)

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    jessrose91 [sign in to see picture]
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    alone4ever wrote:

    jessrose91 wrote:

    he has not problem with keeping it up, and has no problem satifying me, its just always seems to be the same positions all the time and the same thing, yes i enjoy them but want to be a bit more adventours

    I wasn't suggesting he had a problem satisfying you or keeping it up, only that in his mind using toys is upsetting his male ego, i,e, only used by men who can't finnish the job. reasure him thats not the case that you just want to add a new twist to your love making.

    oh i understood you wasnt suggested any of that haha im not to sure if he find it uppsetting or not but we will defo be talking to night :) xx

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    jessrose91 wrote:

    thanks guy for all the help and we have spoken breifly over text in the last hour or so and are on the samw wave lengh and both want to change and try new things we are going to talk tonight when he is home from work :)

    Thats good. I would just try different positions for now and perhaps toys at a later stage. You don't want to introduce too much all at once .

    To give you an idea of time frames its probably taken us just over 2 years to were we are at the moment . Key thing is , is to keep establishing boundaries , but you can only do this through good comminication. All this in turn will help to solidify and cement the bonds between both of you and make your relationship even stronger,

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    pusseypleaser [sign in to see picture]
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    Oh thats excellent Jessrose91.

    Lets us know how your chat goes tonight

    jessrose91 wrote:

    thanks guy for all the help and we have spoken breifly over text in the last hour or so and are on the samw wave lengh and both want to change and try new things we are going to talk tonight when he is home from work :)

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    popk1n [sign in to see picture]
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    let us know if goes ok :)

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    Anubis [sign in to see picture]
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    Perhaps surprise him dressed in a sexy uniform? When my wife does that I'm up for (almost) anything!

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