The 12 Toys of Christmas!

Lovehoney's 12 Days of Christmas. . . .Alltogether now! . . . . .

On the first day of Christmas Lovehoney gave to me an OA girl in a sex swing.

On the second day of christmas Lovehoney gave to me Two Ben wa Balls and an OA girl in a sex swing.

On the third day of christmas Lovehoney gave to me Three strap on dildos, two ben wa balls and an OA girl in a sex swing.

On the forth day of christmas lovehoney gave to me four anal love beads, three strap on dildos, two ben wa balls and an OA girl in a sex swing.

On the fifth day of christmas lovehoney gave to me Five co-ock ringsssss! four anal love beads, three strap on dildos,two ben wa balls and an OA girl in a sex swing.

On the sixth day of christmas lovehoney gave to me six feather ticklers, five co-ock rings! four anal love beads, three strap on dildos, two ben wa balls and an OA girl in a sex swing.

On the seventh day of christmas lovehoney gave to me seven whips and floggers, six feather ticklers, five co-ock rings! four anal love beads, three strap on dildos, two ben wa balls and an OA girl in a sex swing.

On the eighth day of christmas lovehoney gave to me eight Lubyankas, seven whips and floggers, six feather ticklers, five co-ock rings ! four anal love beads, three strap on dildos, two ben wa balls and an OA girl in a sex swing.

On the ninth day of christmas lovehoney gave to me nine rubber gimp masks, eight Lubyankas, seven whips and floggers, six feather ticklers, five co-ock rings! four anal love beads, three strap on dildos, two ben wa balls and an OA girl in a sex swing.

On the tenth day of christmas lovehoney gave to me ten spanking paddles, nine rubber gimp masks, eight Lubyankas, seven whips and floggers, six feather ticklers, five co-ock rings! four anal love beads, three strap on dildos, two ben wa balls and an OA girl in a sex swing.

On the eleventh day of christmas love honey gave to me eleven Ruths a emailing, ten spanking paddles, nine rubber gimp masks, eight Lubyankas, seven whips and floggers, six feather ticklers, five co-ock rings! Four anal love beads, three strap on dildos, two ben wa balls and an OA girl in a sex swing.

Deep breath now. . . . .take it all in one go if you can. . . . .

On the twelfth day of christmas lovehoney gave to me twelve Carly's bollocking, eleven Ruths a emailing, ten spanking paddles, nine rubber gimp masks, eight Lubyankas, seven whips and floggers, six feather ticklers, five co-ock rings! four anal love beads, three strap on dildos,two ben wa balls and. . . . .

(Big finish now. . .)  AN OAAAAA GIRRRLLLL  IN A SEX SWINNNNG!

Happy Christmas Lovehoney!

SG69 x

MY Twelve Hunks of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me a delectable David Duchovny

On the second day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me wonderful Woody Harrelson and a hot and a delectable David Duchovny

On the third day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me Robert Downey Junior, wonderful Woody Harrelson and a hot and a delectable David Duchovny

On the fourth day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me a virile Viggo Mortensen, Robert Downey Junior, wonderful Woody Harrelson and a delectable David Duchovny

On the fifth day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me Chris Kane who sings, a virile Viggo Mortensen, Robert Downey Junior, wonderful Woody Harrelson and a hot and a delectable David Duchovny

On the sixth day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me randy Ryan Kwanten, Chris Kane who sings, a virile Viggo Mortensen, Robert Downey Junior, wonderful Woody Harrelson and a hot and a delectable David Duchovny

On the seventh day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me sexy Seth Rogan, randy Ryan Kwanten, Chris Kane who sings, a virile Viggo Mortensen, Robert Downey Junior, wonderful Woody Harrelson and a hot and a delectable David Duchovny

On the eighth day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me Callum Keith Rennie, sexy Seth Rogan, randy Ryan Kwanten, Chris Kane who sings, a virile Viggo Mortensen, Robert Downey Junior, wonderful Woody Harrelson and a delectable David Duchovny

On the ninth day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me jiggy James Franco, Callum Keith Rennie, sexy Seth Rogan, randy Ryan Kwanten, Chris Kane who sings, a virile Viggo Mortensen, Robert Downey Junior, wonderful Woody Harrelson and a delectable David Duchovny

On the tenth day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me horny Hugh Jackman, jiggy James Franco, Callum Keith Rennie, sexy Seth Rogan, randy Ryan Kwanten, Chris Kane who sings, a virile Viggo Mortensen, Robert Downey Junior, wonderful Woody Harrelson a delectable David Duchovny

On the eleventh day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me juicy Johnny Depp, horny Hugh Jackman, jiggy James Franco, Callum Keith Rennie, sexy Seth Rogan, randy Ryan Kwanten, Chris Kane who sings, a virile Viggo Mortensen, Robert Downey Junior, wonderful Woody Harrelson and a delectable David Duchovny

On the twelfth day of Christmas, LoveHoney sent to me Alexander Skarsgard, juicy Johnny Depp, horny Hugh Jackman, jiggy James Franco, Callum Keith Rennie, sexy Seth Rogan, randy Ryan Kwanten, Chris Kane who sings, a virile Viggo Mortensen, Robert Downey Junior, wonderful Woody Harrelson and a delectable David Duchovny

x 

JG, you serious have awesome taste in men, lol

Morbidia wrote:

JG, you serious have awesome taste in men, lol

Agreed! How could we arrange for these to be stocked by popular demand?

i got so into your list i didnt care

On the first day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
A set of jumbo jelly thai beads  

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=661

On the second day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=86

On the third day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Three Big Bens, 
.Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads 

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=8718

On the fourth day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Four Sex Toy Nerds, 
Three Big Bens, 
.Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads . 

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/bloggers/carly-drew/

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/bloggers/the-professor/

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/bloggers/richard-longhurst/

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/bloggers/bonny-hall/

On the fifth day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Five Rubber Rings, 
Four Sex Toy Nerds, 
Three Big Bens, 
.Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads .. 

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=15772

On the sixth day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Six floggers flailing, 
. Five Rubber Rings, 
Four Sex Toy Nerds, 
Three Big Bens, 
.Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=15707

On the seventh day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Seven tongues-a-rimming,
Six floggers flailing, 
. Five Rubber Rings, 
Four Sex Toy Nerds, 
Three Big Bens, 
.Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=15481

On the eighth day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Eight prostates-a-milking,  
Seven tongues-a-rimming,
Six floggers flailing, 
. Five Rubber Rings, 
Four Sex Toy Nerds, 
Three Big Bens, 
.Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=14762

On the ninth day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Nine ladies bathing, 
Eight prostates milking,  
Seven tongues-a-rimming,
Six floggers flailing, 
. Five Rubber Rings, 
Four Sex Toy Nerds, 
Three Big Bens, 
.Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=5072

On the tenth day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Ten lads-a-peeping,  
Nine ladies bathing, 
Eight prostates milking,  
Seven tongues-a-rimming,
Six floggers flailing, 
. Five Rubber Rings, 
Four Sex Toy Nerds, 
Three Big Bens, 
.Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=85

On the eleventh day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Eleven erotic writings, 
Ten lads-a-peeping,  
Nine ladies bathing, 
Eight prostates milking,  
Seven tongues-a-rimming,
Six floggers flailing, 
. Five Rubber Rings, 
Four Sex Toy Nerds, 
Three Big Bens, 
.Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/fun/erotic-books/

On the twelfth day of Christmas, 
my true love sent to me 
Twelve buzzers buzzing, 
Eleven erotic writings, 
Ten lads-a-peeping,  
Nine ladies bathing, 
Eight prostates milking,  
Seven tongues-a-rimming,
Six floggers flailing, 
. Five Rubber Rings, 
Four Sex Toy Nerds, 
Three Big Bens, 
.Two latex gloves, 
And a set of jumbo jelly thai beads!

http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=13650

Phew! Spent most of today browsing around on the site to find stuff that would fit with the original song! Lol! So much time , for no real good reason!

That is bloody amazing Avrielle_Aniko . Well done - the best yet!

Yay! Thankies hun!

 Wow Avrielle_Aniko that was just amazing!!! Love it!!!

x

Just seen this Averielle, defo the best one by miles girl- good stuff

SG69 x

'Twas the night before Sexmas

and I felt aroused

The computer was stirring,

my hand on the mouse

My stockings and corset

I'd put on with care

In hopes that my buddies

all would be there

But the forum was quiet

No new posts to be read

All the Orgasm Army

Must be in their beds

No-one was on Facebook

In the hours afore morn

I racked my poor brain

As to how I'd find porn

When outside my window

I heard such a noise

The crack of a whip

and the buzzing of toys

Out of the front door

I flew like a flash

Was I in a stupor?

Could it be the hash?

Goosebumps on my breasts

I felt all aglow

What could be happening?

I wanted to know

When what did my roving

eyes fall upon

But a bevy of beauties

All stood on my lawn

With a handsome young captain

Like they breed them in Texas

I knew in moment

It had to be Nexas

At the sight of them all

Why, nearly I came

I knew every one

and could call them by name:

Now sweetlove! Now emmilou!

More I could see

Masterandslave! Columbus!

KittyPurry! Bride2be!

And Wizzie! And Avrielle!

Oh how could I thank ya

Morbidia! Diamonds!

And lovely Lubyanka!

Mistress Cara! And Rowan!

Oh this was grand!

BBM, SmoothOne, Peachy,

Sexynurse, Magic Hands

Sweetsubmission, AdnaW, Andserkiel

All looking so sexy

sexylittle minx, Rowan, imelda,

Livingfire,red30, BBJ and Ecksvie

The LoveHoney staff too

I was feeling so wet

Then my eyes fell upon him

My dear SEXYGET!

A wink of his eye

And a twist of his head

Everything was cool

I had nothing to dread

We spoke not a word

But all went straight to work

All corsets and stockings

Came off with a jerk

Everyone all at once

Joined in on the game

We groaned and we tangled

All together we came

We regained our composure

Everyone was alright

Much kissing and hugging

Then they flew out of sight

But just as they vanished

They wished me good luck

Happy Sexmas to all

And thanks for the ...

  Wow JG! Genius!!! My chin has hit the floor! *Round of applause* Amazing!!!

x

Thank you m&s - I hope I got everybody in. If not, sorry

Laugh Out Loud Girl :-) Thanks for the mention mate ;-)
Brilliant indeed! Just read this on my phone in work and has give me a giggle alright. Very good JG. As I read it I pictured you reciting it on a stage. Hope folks post more stuff like this, tis good :-) SG69 x Hopefully I can find time to do a suitable reply. . .

Oops - I actually mentioned Rowan twice - sorry Must be her tempting me with Dundee cake

Thats amazing ^_^

You have to submit that to, uhhh, somewhere! lol

Oooh, maybe it could be the OA anthem ^_^ xx

Thanks SG - means a lot

Morbidia - I submitted it here LOL for you all to enjoy, to dispel my Grinchitude. If we have a flag, a teeshirt, 'tis only fitting we have an anthem I guess. If I knew how to go about it, I would record it for Jack-off-anory.

Wow! That was awesome and gave me a good chuckle too! Good work girl!

 I think Lubyanka was going to sing some of the best for us!

x