• New experiences to try as a couple

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    Thatjacksmith [sign in to see picture]
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    Me and my partner have a pretty active sex life and are always looking for new ways to mix it up and spice it up a little more, make things more adventurous and intersting. We are more than up for trying things once and seeing what our limits can be and what suits us best so if there are any couples with suggestions or ides we are more than happy to take them on board but nothing cringey or weird please :)

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    NatandTom [sign in to see picture]
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    Pease stick to one thread to avoid blocking up the forum! There's a search function at the top in which you'll find plenty of ideas and suggestions. People are still responding to your other very similar thread too. x

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    Stuburns [sign in to see picture]
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    ^^ well said 👍🏼

    1447237817
    Thatjacksmith [sign in to see picture]
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    I do apoligise very new to this, is there any way of deleting this thread and i will stick to one? thanks for the heads up

    1447241210
    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    I think this is a slightly different request to the one referring to toys as this is more to do with methodolgy and techniques to try rather than pure toys.

    Anyway if you both have good channells of communication and are both open to each other as you should be then why not do a sex survey ? We do one of thse every 6 months and they are a laugh to complete.

    The only piece of equipment you will need for this is a PC that is connected to a printer.

    Just list all the sex positions, kinks , fantasies down in a list. Thus could be things like use of restraints, spanking, spanking with implements, senssual massage, bondage with rope,roll playing, various sex positions etc etc.

    Against each task place a Yes, No , or Maybe option.

    Then print a copy off to each partner and then complete. Then compare answers.

    Anything that has Yes completed by both parties is something to try. A maybe by both parties is something to perhaps after further discussion to try in the future pperhaps after some research .

    No is a no and no attempt should be made to change your partners answer .

    Good luck

    1447244239
    Thatjacksmith [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks for that, sounds like something that could really come in handy and be very useuful to us, we are very open with eachother and always discuss what we like and dislike or help eachother out with tips and techniques so i think we might just give that a try :D

    1447247309
    sassykitten;) [sign in to see picture]
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    mysteron wrote:

    I think this is a slightly different request to the one referring to toys as this is more to do with methodolgy and techniques to try rather than pure toys.

    Anyway if you both have good channells of communication and are both open to each other as you should be then why not do a sex survey ? We do one of thse every 6 months and they are a laugh to complete.

    The only piece of equipment you will need for this is a PC that is connected to a printer.

    Just list all the sex positions, kinks , fantasies down in a list. Thus could be things like use of restraints, spanking, spanking with implements, senssual massage, bondage with rope,roll playing, various sex positions etc etc.

    Against each task place a Yes, No , or Maybe option.

    Then print a copy off to each partner and then complete. Then compare answers.

    Anything that has Yes completed by both parties is something to try. A maybe by both parties is something to perhaps after further discussion to try in the future pperhaps after some research .

    No is a no and no attempt should be made to change your partners answer .

    Good luck

    Sounds like great fun :)

    1447329960
    Thatjacksmith [sign in to see picture]
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    Mentioned this sex survey idea last night to my partner and she jumped at the idea, we learnt a lot from it and surprisingly came up with a few new things we both said yes to that weren't expected! so thanks for that suggestion it has come in handy already : )

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    Well that sounds like a lot of fun! Please enjoy the forums

    1447337198
    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    Glad I could be of help. We complete one at least every year as fantasies and wants can change .

    It avoids those awkward questions like "Will you spank me ? " Even the most communicative of people could find asking for something like that a little daunting .

    1447338831
    Thatjacksmith [sign in to see picture]
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    Well thank you again, I can see how it makes things easier and solves a lot of unaswered questions or fantasies :)

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    We don't complete any of my fantasies! He doesn't have any and doesn't want to know mine!! So I have to do it via social media with one or two special people! sadly!!!

    God he's so boring most of the time when it comes to some filth in or out of the bedroom and he will not change! sigh :(

    1447410842
    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    Ozz wrote:

    We don't complete any of my fantasies! He doesn't have any and doesn't want to know mine!! So I have to do it via social media with one or two special people! sadly!!!

    God he's so boring most of the time when it comes to some filth in or out of the bedroom and he will not change! sigh :(

    I agree Ozz but the key thing is that you love him to bits as you should. I don't think any of our partners are 100% perfect. and therefore will have some short comings.

    1454286132
    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    Just thought I would post details of the latest sex survey we have done on each. We did them in the pub over lunch. No awkward questions

    Anyway the results are

    Yes for both parties- Food play,sensual massage'kissing and hugging,groping and fondling,tickling,oral sex,probing,fingering,rubbing,sucking and biting,sex toys,role playing,spanking,teasing using blindfolds and handcuffs etc,dry humping,ice play,stripping,showering together,Naked Twister,body painting and electro sex

    Yes( one party her )- watching porn (that's a change)

    Maybe ( need more consultation with each other first) Candles hot wax ,Rimming and Anal

    No - sex with same gender ,sex with more than one person

    No( one party me ) -Porn

    1454324799
    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    I thought I would expand on the above a bit as it was late last night when when I did the post.

    I havn't had chance to discuss these with the Mrs yet as I think there are plenty of areas to discuss despite the niumber of "yes"s

    First thing to comment on is the change of attitude of my Mrs over porn. She never liked many of the sites as it didn't depict women in a too favourable light shall we say in her opinion . So I am just wondering if she has been peeking at some female friendly sites . Naughty minx ! lol.I wondered why her sex drive had increased a little !

    Anal for the first time is on the consultation board which is probably testament of arresting my IBS problem . This still needs a lot more talks as I have still some reservations and I am sure she has.

    I think the Candle hot wax will get the green light sooner rather than later . It was our lack of undrstanding of how the low temperature candles worked as neither of us fancied getting burned. It would be a good addition to our skin sensory sessions and massage sessions. On that basis I can't see a problem of getting that through .

    Naked Twister ( lubed up with baby oil ) was a surprise to me as since giving childbirth she hasn't been confident of her body and hated being totally in the nude . So maybe things are improving and I think playing games like Manogomy has helped here.

    The other big yes was electro sex. I think its something we have always talked about and now it appears both of us want to do it. The only downside is that its a bit of a rich mans toy at the moment as all the equipmwnt is very expensive. It could also be used in Nurse and interrogations type role plays .So plenty of scope for use.

    Another areea for exploration is in the Spanking section and that is my curiosity for how a caning feels. The big question is would I trust my Mrs with a cane?. If she folows the procedures as laid out in our book about tucking a cushion under the caining arm then perhaps yes . Of course she still has to make sure she hits the target . Caning is in the main down to wrist action . So experimantation over clothes may be the way forward. Again talks will be required but I think It will make the school head Mistress role play more realistic as the use of the paddle was in the main a US thing.

    So as not to reach saturation point in our surveys I may add more activities in such as fantasies to be done via Role Plays .

    In conclusion I think Sex surveys are an excellent vehicle if you are thinking of trying new things as the above proves, whilst the majority were a yes there is still plenty to talk about . The survey also removes that awkward situation of bringing new subjects up for discussion in the first instance.

    So if both of you are thinking of trying new experiences than doing a sex survey on each other may just be the ticket in helping .

    The survey we used is out of the Oral Sex books that we bought from Lovehoney and are in the appendix .

    1454336529
    Platinum [sign in to see picture]
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    @ Mysteron

    A caning feels different to each recipient in fact to the same recipient on different days, just like any other sensation play technique. The single most important factor effecting the response to caning is the recipients mood.

    It is my OH favourite form of foreplay. If she is unsettled or nervous as to my mood, the setting or a huge range of other factors, she gets twitchy and cannot relax in to it. If she is uncomfortable or in pain, ongoing medical problems, that can have the same effect. In such circumstances I have to slowly work up to it, starting with the lightest of spanking and then through other toys until I know she has reached her special place.

    This is something we have evolved, together over time. I am sure you have read wonderful books on the matter and given it much thought but you are in danger of removing all the intuition out of it and making it mechanistic for your OH and ultimately you.

    My advice would first of all be to get the right cane. Whilst crook handled ones look great for school RP they are a pain to use comfortably. Secondly remember thin cains transfer the same energy upon contact through a smaller surface area so bite harder and hence mark more. The tip of a cain is the fastest moving and hence most powerful striking part of it, a longer cane will have more power for the same wrist action as a shorter one. So in summary, consider starting out with a shorter, thicker straight cane. When your OH can control that they can then investigate the different sensations available from other canes and find what works for you.

    A cane is to a bottom as a bow is to a violin, as a violinist you use all its properties to play your instrument. My advice would be to get a cane, get your OH to practice hitting a cushion, prefeably made of a fabric like velvet with a nap so that where the stroke lands is visible. Do not hit hard but get to be accurate. Then move to a real bottom, one that has been warmed up with a nice spanking or paddling first. Use a bottom that talks, gives feedback as to what feels nice or nasty. Be slow and rhythmic so that where and when a stroke is going to land is predictable.

    If this sort of play is something you wish to investigate further then I would suggest you seek out guidance through a fet fair.

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks good advice .It's not something we are going to do immediately as like you said and I have commelted in other threads .there is a skill in using the cane . The one I was actually looking at is the only one that Lovehoney stock and that is the leather covered rod.

    My Oh has got to learn using the other implements yet as it's normally me who is the speaker and she the spanked. But we are hoping to start switching a bit more often .

    Thanks

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