• Is kissing/snogging cheating?

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    Echo32B [sign in to see picture]
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    Luv bunny wrote:

    Hmm, definitely some food for thought. Though I flirt with both genders on here, so it's just the way I am I guess...

    In my mind though, actions speak so much more than words...so it's one thing to type stuff here, but completely different to actually going out and looking to hook up with someone. Again, it's such a grey area. If my OH asked me, I wouldn't necessarily lie, but he probably wouldn't be happy with what I've put on here.

    F*ck, I really feel like a b*tch now...

    Dont feel bad luv bunny, you have quite literally 'done' nothing wrong :) what your doing is playful banter with no intention behind it. However if you are realising that he wouldnt be over the moon about your flirting maybe you should think more carefully about doing it in the future. I personally dont flirt on the forum, but I wouldnt actually care If my OH did. xxx

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    Luv bunny [sign in to see picture]
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    Echo32B wrote:

    Luv bunny wrote:

    Hmm, definitely some food for thought. Though I flirt with both genders on here, so it's just the way I am I guess...

    In my mind though, actions speak so much more than words...so it's one thing to type stuff here, but completely different to actually going out and looking to hook up with someone. Again, it's such a grey area. If my OH asked me, I wouldn't necessarily lie, but he probably wouldn't be happy with what I've put on here.

    F*ck, I really feel like a b*tch now...

    Dont feel bad luv bunny, you have quite literally 'done' nothing wrong :) what your doing is playful banter with no intention behind it. However if you are realising that he wouldnt be over the moon about your flirting maybe you should think more carefully about doing it in the future. I personally dont flirt on the forum, but I wouldnt actually care If my OH did. xxx

    http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2011/07/06/when-does-flirting-become-cheating-9-red-flags/

    I just read this, and shit....I fucking well do a few of these things I reckon. No, it's seriously not good for me... 😔 I may as well basically admit now that I'm cheating... Fuck.

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    Young and fun95 [sign in to see picture]
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    In our relationship anything that even hints to someone else that you're available is cheating, definitely flirting and kissing, taking numbers of people you know are interested in you, or giving them your number, or starting a friendship with someone who wants a relationship with you. We think it's important to make it clear you're not available, I'd be heartbroken if someone told me they thought OH fancied them or wanted them

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    Lovethekink [sign in to see picture]
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    Young and fun95 wrote:

    In our relationship anything that even hints to someone else that you're available is cheating, definitely flirting and kissing, taking numbers of people you know are interested in you, or giving them your number, or starting a friendship with someone who wants a relationship with you. We think it's important to make it clear you're not available, I'd be heartbroken if someone told me they thought OH fancied them or wanted them

    +1, I'd hate to find hubby had been flirting with someone, I'd be devastated so I'd never do what I wouldn't be happy with him doing
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    [suspended user]

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    Kissing would def be cheating in our marriage but we both like a flirt ; -)

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    Omnom95 [sign in to see picture]
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    Yes I would consider it cheating unless they had already discussed it with their partner and agreed it was acceptable.

    I'm honestly not sure what my reaction would be. My initial reaction would possibly be to wonder if everything is ok with their relationship. Maybe that wouldn't be at all what I'd think. What I would probably do is bring it up quietly and simply ask if their partner knew about it. I would try not to be accusing as I wouldn't really know if it was acceptable in their relationship or not.

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    In a relaionship that's functioning and loving yes it's cheating!

    In a relationship that has had it's day by both partners, no it's not!

    An open relationship, no way is it cheating!

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    VirginAngel [sign in to see picture]
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    It is absolutely cheating, i've been in the situation and i told their other half myself.

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    Briona87 [sign in to see picture]
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    It is cheating - unless both partners have made a decision their relationship would be an open one.

    I have witnessed this kind of behaviour on multiple occasions (mostly schoool reunions) and while I would never interfere, it makes me...well... I suppose the word "sad" would be the most appropriate one here. I just don't get it - I myself have never had a relationship (and I have never been kissed - I would give anything for just one heartfelt kiss from someone who would care about me) and people who have partners act like that their own relationships are not truly special for them...

    (Okay, I know I am a bit silly but what else would you expect from a 28yo virgin...)

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    HappilyExperimenting [sign in to see picture]
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    You're not silly at all Briona - and you're right, why would you do that to your partner? :( I class kissing and snogging as cheating - hell I'd even be furious if my OH touched another girl's butt! Call me the overly attached girlfriend, but that's how I feel! *throws hands up* I'd be so sad and angry if my OH did this - but he never would. I know he wouldn't. What we have is too special, too good.

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    Top Gun [sign in to see picture]
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    I personally think kissing someone else is cheating and find kissing very intimate

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    wettongues [sign in to see picture]
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    Completely cheating, but it also depends onwhat the twopeople inthe relationship have decided what they between them consider cheating.

    As to the friendship, they are your friend regardless to their relationship choices, you can express your dislike of their choices, but I don't think you can end your friendship with them.

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    Kimberleyking [sign in to see picture]
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    i would tell the stright away in my books even a kiss is cheating i mean what if they where sexing someone? i would still tell them about it its the thiought behind the action i count as cheating xx

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    MissNoir [sign in to see picture]
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    Young and fun95 wrote:

    In our relationship anything that even hints to someone else that you're available is cheating, definitely flirting and kissing, taking numbers of people you know are interested in you, or giving them your number, or starting a friendship with someone who wants a relationship with you. We think it's important to make it clear you're not available, I'd be heartbroken if someone told me they thought OH fancied them or wanted them

    That was a problem with us which contributed to our relationship ending. I had all male friends (mainly due to my uni course) and 8/10 of them showed a romantic interest in me, I would say no & point out I have a bf & that was it nothing was ever said again but my bf at the time wasn;t convinced, he hated me messaging my friends because he thought I'd be flirting, he despised & resented my best friend because we used to like each other & are very close & it got to the point he told me to abandon my friends or we were over.......hence why we are no longer together.

    Kissing is cheating to me, personally I don't see the harm in flirting as long as the person knows you're in a relationship but anything more is cheating, as someone who was accused of cheating on a daily basis when I never, it is hurtful which made me leave.

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    RoosterX [sign in to see picture]
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    For me and my Wife, Kissing is cheating, she would be devestated if I kissed another, and vice versa. Sayhing that my wife has full permission to kiss another lady, but not a man with out prior consent.

    Really what you have to think about is how would your wife/partner/etc feel if you engaged in such an action, you know deep down the truth, so act accordingly. Else talk to them about it, communication is the key.

    Flirting is another thing all together. Im a natural flirt, wy wife jokes about it with me. I dont even realise what im doing. In reality though I cant flirt wiith someone I like I get all goofy and foolish. My wife knows how I am and that I would never cheat, so its not a problem.

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    Vanessa8 [sign in to see picture]
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    Someone else already summed it up above. If your friend and her partner are open about going out and flirting and kissing others on occassion that is one thing. I can still see where that would make you uncomfortable.

    Flirting... well I guess that is like "mental porn" to some people they may flirt of joke around but not take it fruther. That is a gray area that can also be misunderstood by others or make others uncomfortable.

    I am going to assume this chick was drunk and being stupid. As her friend discuss it with her. I had a GF who would get like that at times so I stopped going out if there was drinking invovled becasue I did not want to be a part of that or have others see me with someone going that and assume I am the same.

    If something would hurt my partner I avoid it... that even means "venting" about him to my friends at times. If I am that frustrated I do need to talk directly to him.

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    BumblebeeBuzzed [sign in to see picture]
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    Echo32B wrote:

    Lovehoney - Jess wrote:

    When I hear people talk about 'cheating' I replace the word 'cheating' with 'lying'.

    If by snogging someone else, you have to hide it from your partner / lie about it, then yes it's cheating.

    If it's something that is acceptable within your relationship, and you could talk openly about it with your OH, then it's not cheating.

    No lie or breaking the rules = no cheat.

    Same as playing cards really...

    Hit the nail on the head here. This is what I was trying to say, but you've done a much better job :L x

    Agree 100% literally couldn't have put it better myself!
    1446561358
    Caliente [sign in to see picture]
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    Jess answered the question of "is kissing cheating" perfectly, IMO. Completely depends on your relationship and the rules and expectations you have of each other.

    As for seeing your friends doing it when you are out - if I knew my friend was lying to their partner and their behaviour was cheating, I would remind them of it and tell them I disapproved. If they were drunk, I would probably take them home before they did anything worse. In the cold light of day, I would advise them to talk to their partner and try to fix their issues, or to end their relationship. I wouldn't stop being friends with them, but I would view them differently. I'd feel very uncomfortable continuing to socialise with them if they made a habit out of this.

    This is based entirely on my personal experiences, by the way. I've never cheated, but I have been cheated on and I really wish other people had done the above. :(

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    Just Jenson [sign in to see picture]
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    Whether its kissing or flirting via text message or having sex with someone else, if it's done behind your partners back and you go out of your way to hide it from them then yes it is cheating.

    Personally I don't see being drunk as an excuse for this sort of behaviour . If someone was so drunk that they were taken advantage of, then there's a bigger issue at stake.

    If you want an open relationship where you can cavort around with others, then both partners should be aware and ok with this. Then there would be no need to hide anything and hence no cheating, no lies, no deceit and no one getting hurt.

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