• Feeling guilty about using my vibrator

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    LilMissRachel [sign in to see picture]
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    After I split up with my first long term boyfriend over a year ago I decided it was time to try out some toys as it seemed like all my girlfriends had something and I didn't know what all the fuss was about! I wanted to try a vibrator before but my boyfriend at the time was not too keen on the idea. I had been definately missing out and my new vibrator and dildo became my best friends and have been getting used very regularly since then.

    Now I have a new boyfriend for about 5 months and feel quite guilty as I still like to use them and he has no idea I even have a vibrator. I'm not sure how he would feel and I don't really want to mention anything to him as I like to use them in private. As we don't live together I usually see him in the evening and I feel a bit weird that I've probably had my dildo in me not long before seeing him and he has no idea.

    I'm not really sure what I feel guilty about as I'm sure this is not too uncommon. Any thoughts for reassurance please?

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    hihowareyou [sign in to see picture]
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    you have nothing to feel guilty about everyone masturbates, im sure your new boyfriend doesn't tell you every time he does it, so unless he asks dont stress about it.

    as for how he feels about sex toys, your going to have to ask him to find out, maybe start the conversation about sex in general on stuff he does like and other stuff your not sure about, throw in sex toys into the convesation.

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    Thumper the Rabbit [sign in to see picture]
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    There is nothing to feel guilty or ashamed about. According to science research around 100% of men masturbate and 70% of women masturbate, and the 30% that dont are liars.

    As a guy I found it odd to use toys as it felt like it made me less of a man, but I got over that archaeic idea with the help of my girlfriend and I am not free to enjoy all manner of technology.

    If you are enjoying yourself then there is little to worry about. I think that most gys find it a turn on and the use of toys only enhances that fantasy. Maybe bring it up with him sometime, but don't feel obligated. It is your orgasm so you are the boss of it!!!

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    Vanessa8 [sign in to see picture]
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    Don't.

    It would probably turn him on to know IMO. A man who is intimidated by a toy seems a bit insecure to me?

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    kc. [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm sure he masturbates so don't feel guilty. I bought all of our toys and we have numerous ones. I know my wife uses them when I'm not there in fact I actively encourage her. WE do of course use them together.

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    Deekayjay [sign in to see picture]
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    Some of my toys were actually suggested by my OH and he loves to use them on me - I think most blokes find them a turn on! But you don't to tell him - and certainly don't have to feel guilty!

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    NatandTom [sign in to see picture]
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    Nothing to feel guilty about :)

    Casually bring up sex toys and gage his reaction. I'm sure most guys would like the idea of their lady using a sex toy. Men who don't are usually insecure for whatever reason or think that toys are their replacement. Make sure your new guy knows it's not a replacement, it's just how you prefer to masturbate.

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    Fun Louise [sign in to see picture]
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    Pleasuring yourself is perfectly normal and you have nothing to feel guilty about.

    Do you really think that your boyfriend doesn't pleasure himself when your not there?

    Also getting to know what you like and what turns you on will help make your sex life much more satisfying. It should make you more confident and this can't be a bad thing. Don't ever feel guilty, there is no need.

    If you are thinking of introducing sex toys into your sexlife with your boyfriend, then why not leave your laptop open on the Lovehoney site. I first heard about Lovehoney from a tv advert and went online to find out more. You could tell him the same. Then judge his response. You don't know he might already have toys of his own and he might have used toys with previous girlfriends.

    i hope this helps to offer a different view, and please don't feel guilty just enjoy.

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    Lovinthetoys [sign in to see picture]
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    Dont feel guilty at all,

    Most men are happy for their OH's to use toys, and enjoy the thought of it.

    If you get to the point where you dont want sex due to masturbating too much, there may be a problem. but otherwise, crack on.

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    [suspended user]

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    Never ever feel guilty huni!!! Gezz, he's probably pinching one off every night! Fun Louise, that's a brilliant idea about the laptop! Both parties playing with toys is always so much more fun, but I am partial to playing lots by myself too, don't get me wrong.

    I hate that you felt like that in the first place! x

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    [suspended user]

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    Very early on after meeting wife to be I used to feel major guilt about looking at porn and my special alone time. I think the guilt is a natural response to being in a committed relationship. I overcame it when it turned out she liked watching it with me and we fooled around together watching it. Never looked back. The suggestions above are all good. U should feel guilty anyway. But bringing it into the relationship will probably do good things for you.

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