• Woman in the Office

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    Kentchris1980 [sign in to see picture]
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    Hello,

    I live with my partner who i have been with for over 10 years but recently a younger lady in my office has been flirting with me and i'm very tempted

    Thing with my partner have become boring but I do love her but just need some excitement in my life. I have bought my partner a number of toys, outfits etc but she just doesn't seem interested anymore

    I would feel bad if i cheated but i'm enjoying the attention so What would you do?

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    NatandTom [sign in to see picture]
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    If you aren't happy in your relationship then end it. Don't hurt her just because you're after some excitement. There might be a reason she doesn't seem as interested anymore! Have you spoken to her about how you're feeling and how you'd appreciate more attention?

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    Well, I get that you miss the excitement, but I wouldn't ever justify cheating with that. If your relationship is not working, either try to honestly fix it or end it and move on. Comunication is the only way forward in any relationship, the outcome depends only on you two.

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    Sum Sub [sign in to see picture]
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    Get a new job

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    wildflower [sign in to see picture]
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    Yes it's nice to receive attention from someone other than your partner, it's a bit of an ego boost but do you really want to jeopardise a 10 year relationship with a woman you love ? Personally I would cool the flirting with this other woman and try to find out why things have lost their spark with your partner . As others have said there could be any number of reasons but you'd need to talk to her about that.

    Plus if this woman in your office knows you're in a relationship and still flirts with you then she's probably only after a bit of fun and it's not worth risking what you've got at home just for that is it? And you'd end up feeling guilty and all the other problems would still be there.

    For what it's worth my advise is to have a chat with your partner, find out how she feels about the situation.

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    10 years is a long time. I suggest try to really analyse and work out what's different in current relationship before trying another, and a shag with a colleague could very easily develop into a relationship. Think back to when you fell in love and work out is different now. It may be a practical thing, something has changed, always tired, kids etc. and work on that. Also remember the grass is always greener. You may think this person you like is perfect but they are not perfect, you just don't yet know their flaws, like you do your partners. Of course I don't know anything about your situation, so just advise to really think about what is going on. And if it's just a shag you want, then talk talk talk to your partner. If you're depressed tell them, but explain why. Don't just blame them. Be open. And don't be defensive if anything is said back to you. You may find she feels the same in some ways and you can re-build the intimacy. Good luck.10 years! Wow that's great :) Stick with it!

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    Vanessa8 [sign in to see picture]
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    wow, my first reaction here is don't shit where you eat!

    Seriously, I hope that doesn't offend anyone but you need to think about the implications of an office flirtation or worse on your job and career.

    Workplace flirtation.... kinda cliche but while everyone loves attention and affection you should take this as a wake up call to work on your relationship or do the right thing and move on.

    You should never stop DATING your partner. I speak from experience of falling into a rut with my OH at times... so I go into "girlfirend" mode when we need to reconnect. If there are kids, job stress, etc. she may need a path to really find herself sexually and as a woman again within the context of your relationship. Best wishes here.

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    Lovebirds_x [sign in to see picture]
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    I would assess why exactly I feel the need to get that sort of attention from a random person rather than the one I committed myself to. I would also assess why my partner wasn't so interested. What I would NOT do is destroy another person by cheating on them.

    You can get excitement in your life in many other ways. I would suggest figuring out why you are bored in your relationship and working on that rather than quite literally fucking around. I think you'll find it's a bit more than just your partner not seeming interested, you will have played a part in things coming to this point too.

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    I would say be careful here . I am not a fan of affairs as they often wreck lives of all concerned. So going down that route is a no no for me .

    Also be careful of flirtatious people . Often its just a game to them to get peoples attention.It can be that they get a buzz from getting the other person interested and seeing how far it will go .I know this from personal expereince as both me and my Mrs were a bit flirty in our past. Basically we looked at it as a game of cat and mouse .To a certain extent thats partly how we ended up together by flirting with each other accross a club dance hall . So just be careful of this girls motives here.

    Also you advise us that your existing relationship is boring. You still love your partner and have a good relationship here so don't chuck it .There have beren plenty of other threads on a similar theme here .

    I think you need to look at your own relationship and try and ingnite the spark which both of you once had. The key thing is communication in any relatonship so why not have a talk with your OH say over dinner to find out why the spark is burning a little low at the moment .Then work together to reignite it.

    Once you get talking about sex again then why not both fill in a sex survey on each other to find out your likes and dislikes and perhaps something to explore together in the future. Lifes not boring , perhaps just needing a littel creativity .

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    Mr & Mrs P [sign in to see picture]
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    Don't Don't get tempted !!!
    Although it was nothing physical and I never actually meet this person, it nearly cost me my marriage!!!.

    Have been married 19 years together 22, things had not been all that great and I started chatting to someone online.

    Hubby found out , things could have ended but so grateful was given a second chance .

    You would not believe how sorry I am that I let this happen.
    It will take a long time for him to trust me again but we have learnt to talk about things openly and not take each other for granted.

    We are now having such fun trying different things !!
    Please please talk to your partner , it's definately not worth the risk

    Xx

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    I just wanted to add to my own and the above post .

    Sometimes we tend to take it for granted that we have a relationship that has stood the test of time .

    I have read many posts on this forum which sadden me sometimes of people struggling in trying to get a relationship started with another person and all the let downs and set backs they are enduring .

    Just think yourself lucky that you have a relationship and that others still find you attactive but don't take it any further . Rework your existing relationship you won't regret it.

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    Kentchris1980 [sign in to see picture]
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    thanks guys, we have a date night tonight as kids staying with friends so going have a chat and se what happens

    thanks again

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    I hope that is with the Mrs !

    Good luck

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    Kentchris1980 wrote:

    thanks guys, we have a date night tonight as kids staying with friends so going have a chat and se what happens

    thanks again

    This is great! Have a wonderful and meaningful night! Be open and you'll see results.
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    Kentchris1980 [sign in to see picture]
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    yeah mysteron it's with the other half

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    NatandTom [sign in to see picture]
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    Aw have fun! I hope it goes well and you can get some excitement back after tonight!

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    :) good luck!

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    Just Jenson [sign in to see picture]
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    the grass is only greener elsewhere because you havent watered your own.

    Don't cheat. it isnt cool and neither is it fun for your partner when she has to deal with the betrayal that has been dumped on her doorstep.

    It also wont be so fun when your younger office girl finds someone new to flirt with because thats all shes after and your left out to dry with an ex partner who has wisened up to your betrayal and no 'office attention giver'

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    Well I think you have done the right and decent thing. Don't forget to romance her and act like a proper gentleman ( etiquette) on the night in question. and dress to impress. It will impress her and she will thank you for it.

    Can you kindly let us all know via an update on how the night went ?

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    Kentchris1980 [sign in to see picture]
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    yeah i let you know

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