• never wanted to scream and cry so much because im too big.

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    Kittycat102 [sign in to see picture]
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    regular_john wrote:

    Kittycat102 wrote:

    regular_john wrote:

    You could always just lose weight?

    How rude. Ever thought she feels beautiful the way she is and doesn't have to change for anyone or society's messed up standards of body image and beauty?

    I wasn't trying to be rude - it's a valid suggestion to solve her problem. She's asking for advice because she's too fat for commonly available products. Her optionsm therefore, are to either spend a fortune on custom made products or lose some weight and be slim enough to fit into the normal products.

    I say this as someone who's carrying more than a few spare pounds himself. I'm getting to the point now where I can't find jeans that fit my combination of tiny legs and beer gut. My solution is to get my ass to a gym rather than pay a fortune for custom made jeans and remain at an unhealthy weight.

    Either way, chastity is awesome. I hope you find a product that suits you.

    Well then you should of phrased it completely differently and expanded on what you meant to begin with as no one is a mind reader and you could of unintentionally offended and upset her by just saying you could lose some weight

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    Minkish Minx [sign in to see picture]
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    regular_john wrote:

    Kittycat102 wrote:

    regular_john wrote:

    You could always just lose weight?

    How rude. Ever thought she feels beautiful the way she is and doesn't have to change for anyone or society's messed up standards of body image and beauty?

    I wasn't trying to be rude - it's a valid suggestion to solve her problem. She's asking for advice because she's too fat for commonly available products. Her optionsm therefore, are to either spend a fortune on custom made products or lose some weight and be slim enough to fit into the normal products.

    I say this as someone who's carrying more than a few spare pounds himself. I'm getting to the point now where I can't find jeans that fit my combination of tiny legs and beer gut. My solution is to get my ass to a gym rather than pay a fortune for custom made jeans and remain at an unhealthy weight.

    Either way, chastity is awesome. I hope you find a product that suits you.

    Maybe you could put some effort into phrasing your words a little better? I found your initial comment offensive and judgemental. I don't think that being plus-sized yourself excuses anything and to me, it just sounds like you're up on a pretty high horse. You have no idea of what her situation is so maybe next time show a little more empathy and respect for a lady.

    @stephiski - I think my best advice has been covered by other people in the thread (to source for a plus size alternative and post about it at the Pander to Me thread). Frankly, I'm quite surprised that Lovehoney doesn't already have a plus size chastity belt available for purchase. I hope you find something but most of all I hope that you feel better! I admire your confidence in yourself and really, that's what makes anyone beautiful.

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    Kittycat102 wrote:

    regular_john wrote:

    You could always just lose weight?

    How rude. Ever thought she feels beautiful the way she is and doesn't have to change for anyone or society's messed up standards of body image and beauty?

    I myself was disgusted by that comment totally uncalled for. Nobody should be spoken to that way. It was rude, and would be to speak too anybody that way, I myself would never do that and I'm certain 90% of people agree. I'm glad you took it on the chin, you should be proud and happy with your body :)<3 xxxx
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    Minkish Minx wrote:

    regular_john wrote:

    Kittycat102 wrote:

    regular_john wrote:

    You could always just lose weight?

    How rude. Ever thought she feels beautiful the way she is and doesn't have to change for anyone or society's messed up standards of body image and beauty?

    I wasn't trying to be rude - it's a valid suggestion to solve her problem. She's asking for advice because she's too fat for commonly available products. Her optionsm therefore, are to either spend a fortune on custom made products or lose some weight and be slim enough to fit into the normal products.

    I say this as someone who's carrying more than a few spare pounds himself. I'm getting to the point now where I can't find jeans that fit my combination of tiny legs and beer gut. My solution is to get my ass to a gym rather than pay a fortune for custom made jeans and remain at an unhealthy weight.

    Either way, chastity is awesome. I hope you find a product that suits you.

    Maybe you could put some effort into phrasing your words a little better? I found your initial comment offensive and judgemental. I don't think that being plus-sized yourself excuses anything and to me, it just sounds like you're up on a pretty high horse. You have no idea of what her situation is so maybe next time show a little more empathy and respect for a lady.
    Well said, your worded your post better than me (anger kicked in). Exactly as a body conscious person myself, that comment would of really upset me. There's just no need to be disrespectful like that. I honestly couldn't believe what I read! Apologies for the double post folks

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    stephiski [sign in to see picture]
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    I have grown thicker skin recently and i think being a swinger has helped me because i was terrified of a man seeing my scars and curves.
    Last year i was in an abusive relationship and i had moved in from march28th to july16th the same year. In that time i put on 5stone and i developed what the physio called snapping hip syndrome and while i was there i had incontinence issues because of weight messing up my nerves and so on.
    All in all i have lost 6stone and i am a nice size. Sometimes i think i look too big but in general im happy with myself. If i wasnt i couldnt put photos up because when the ex put photos of me on a sex fetish site. So. I apprecieate all your support and i really do. Im sorry if i rant on but the frustration for plus size is stupid. One i found in the uk and that design looks terrible because of the structure of the fastenings. I can order one from china yeah all well and good but i know full well after the 5 weeks wait and building my hopes up if i had to send it back i would be more frustrated than ever. So dont want to take that chance. Its stupid because i have come across a few things that are not out there which should be.
    And as for loosing weight yeah i could continue and become obsessed over my body image which was close to happening but i then wouldnt be happy or healthy or sane and i have big bone structure anyway. Always have and always will.
    People often say to me you are not a size 18 behave yourself but i am because of my hips ana boobs mainly. But i occasionally snap a decent photo of myself and thats all the confidence boost i need and where i think im happy as i am. Again sorry for ranting this post must be very long😕
    sorry if it sounded like i was nagging or anything im the kind of person that says what comes to mind without filtering it which is not ideal lol. Thank you all for your comments.

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    stephiski [sign in to see picture]
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    May i ask as i am curious how many people read his post and read "because she is too fat for commonly available products" and thats what riled you?
    because if you think if he had of said "big" i would have taken less offense or is that me being weird again lol

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    As soon as I saw the first post I was furious, I hadn't even saw the second one as I instantly started typing like a woman on a rampage lol! I'm not going to mention it again because I have made my feelings on the matter pretty clear. My advice would be don't give it a second thought, btw your pic is awesome. You should be extremely proud loosing all that weight. You seem to have a really good head on your shoulders chic.
    Did you try the (pander to me) for product request's? They're really good, like you say the products are out there and Lovehoney definitely listen to customers and I think it's a great point you will be making. Xxx

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    stephiski [sign in to see picture]
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    I have posted on that thread yeah. Thank you hun:) x

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    Minkish Minx [sign in to see picture]
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    stephiski wrote:

    May i ask as i am curious how many people read his post and read "because she is too fat for commonly available products" and thats what riled you?
    because if you think if he had of said "big" i would have taken less offense or is that me being weird again lol

    The word "fat" definitely threw me off, but I think it was the overall sentiment that irked me. I get piqued when people think it's okay to be rude / condescending / judgemental to larger people just because they are plus-sized themselves. It's like it gives them a free pass or something. Ultimately, it's your body and it's your choice. If you want to lose weight, it ought to be your personal choice and not because you feel pressured to fit into what society dictates is a suitable size. Or a "normal" size as he put it. (definitely another word that riled me)

    Kudos to you for being so strong and confident. I'm so sorry to hear about your abusive relationship. That sounds really rough, but I'm happy to know that you've emerged stronger for it. True beauty always finds it source from confidence and acceptance, which is why I think you're beautiful. (:

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    Kimberleyking [sign in to see picture]
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    :/ a problem i face much too often with my curves its hard to fing underwear that fits letalone anything else hope you get the answers you want xx

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    steevo68 [sign in to see picture]
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    Be happy as you are hun your avatar is amazing. I take it you have returned the belt? an option may have been to get a larger waist belt(assuming the crotch section is not stitched to it) and making a hole opposite the adjustable ones on the belt that you could fit the padlock to

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    Malificent [sign in to see picture]
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    Hi Steph,

    Just want you to know that I adore you! x

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    T16s [sign in to see picture]
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    stephiski wrote:

    May i ask as i am curious how many people read his post and read "because she is too fat for commonly available products" and thats what riled you?
    because if you think if he had of said "big" i would have taken less offense or is that me being weird again lol

    Yes it came across as rude and unfeeling and the post to explain what was ment didn't come across any better from my veiw point.

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    stephiski [sign in to see picture]
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    I did send the belt back yeah. I kind of am being stubborn as i have been thinking and now know how i could make two of them fit me perfect but i kind of feel like i will need two so thats double the cost. Like kinda being penalised for my size. Im probably ranting on so sorry.

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    Chris098 [sign in to see picture]
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    stephiski wrote:

    I did send the belt back yeah. I kind of am being stubborn as i have been thinking and now know how i could make two of them fit me perfect but i kind of feel like i will need two so thats double the cost. Like kinda being penalised for my size. Im probably ranting on so sorry.

    Hun.. for everything you went through you should be proud of yourself and you have a great figure. XXX

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    stephiski [sign in to see picture]
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    Thank you all for your lovely comments x

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    Hun.. for everything you went through you should be proud of yourself and you have a great figure. XXX

    Plus 1 couldn't agree more :-)
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    Chris098 wrote:

    stephiski wrote:

    I did send the belt back yeah. I kind of am being stubborn as i have been thinking and now know how i could make two of them fit me perfect but i kind of feel like i will need two so thats double the cost. Like kinda being penalised for my size. Im probably ranting on so sorry.

    Hun.. for everything you went through you should be proud of yourself and you have a great figure. XXX

    Don't know why this didn't work, I quoted this, not tried to steal it lol! I completely agree, and without a doubt the lovely lass should be proud :-)
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    D.j [sign in to see picture]
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    Dear Stephiski your avitar looks great I lost my wife recently she was curvey! It what's on the inside that is important not on the outside hope you get what you wanted Dxx

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    Vanessa8 [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm late to this thread but wanted to say I wish you all the best finding what you seek.... as women we are always our own worst critics of our body. Keep smiling and love yourself.

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