• Fuck buddy advice please!

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    jr78 [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks onlyones, I'll keep you updated, think the friendship thing with no sex is maybe the way to go, I'm gonna have to stay permanently sober though coz God knows how I'll be able to keep my hands off him but I'll try my very best....maybe invest in some handcuffs off here ha ha! 😂 x

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    I agree but some men are "sods"( my wife's term) when it comes to relationships with women. A blokes natural instinct is to sew his seed . That is nature . Thats why some women have to rein in their guy and really work at their relationship to stop him straying . There are even web sites dedicated to fixing up flings and affairs which personally I think is morally wrong. The fact that you guy is a FB to start off with means he will more likely stray as things stand .

    Don't get me wrong all men arn't like this and there are many guy forum members and partners of the ladies on here in long and successful relationships. My own being 25 years is probably one of the longest on here .

    So going back to your situation your "relationship" is at a junction. You can either turn left and not get hurt and call the "relationship" off amicably. You can also turn right and move the relationship along but there will be a risk of getting hurt and will require a lot of work . That is why you need a long chat perhaps over dinner and then decide . but your chances of getting hurt are greater than turning left.

    Like I said your are the one IMHO who is holding all the cards. It upto you how you play them . Only your own mind and your heart can tell you your best course of action but decide after another chat.

    Good luck and I hope everything goes well whichever route you decide.

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    Onlyones [sign in to see picture]
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    Mysteron I can beat 25 years,we have been together 37 years.

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    Onlyones [sign in to see picture]
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    I like the sound of the handcuffs but maybe a pair each might be best.

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    Onlyones [sign in to see picture]
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    Something else to ponder all relationships run the risk of one or both parties being hurt as no one knows how things will progress really hope you can both work this out ,if all else fails just cry and he will be putty in your hands works for my wife all the time.That was a joke by the way except the bit about my wife that is very real but i love her to bits anyway.

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    Onlyones wrote:

    Mysteron I can beat 25 years,we have been together 37 years.

    Congratulations that is excellent and quite rare these days. Gives me and the Mrs something to aim for !

    Perhaps it might be worth starting a thread on how long your current relationship is ? Then again it excludes those that arn't in a relationship and may upset others who have just ended a relationship . Perhaps not a good idea .

    Actually I've done myself out of a year it should be 26.

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    Onlyones [sign in to see picture]
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    Mysteron 26 years is a fantastic achievement and has probably taken quite a bit of work as from experience it is not all plain sailing over that length of time.

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    Onlyones wrote:

    Mysteron 26 years is a fantastic achievement and has probably taken quite a bit of work as from experience it is not all plain sailing over that length of time.

    Your bang on the money . We like any others have had our choppy waters. Even resorting to a plate throwing contest at each other . What a mess that was after , I mean the floor here as some still had food on ! Its how you make up afterwards and sometimes you have to make concessions and admit your wrong when in fact you weren't . But after these disagreements have been resolved your relationship tends to be stronger for it.

    Thats why this forum needs people like yourselves to offer their experience to others seeking advice.

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    Onlyones [sign in to see picture]
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    Mysteron thanks for that.I think you also should not under estimate your own value as I am sure jr78 would agree.People must in the end make there own decisions you can only offer advice and be prepared to listen and still be there if things go wrong.

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    jr78 [sign in to see picture]
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    I've found everyone's advice has been really helpful, I could have asked my best friend or sister but posted on here & had you all helping me out, it's really nice that people took time to answer & it's been good to get a male point of view too. Another thing that I didn't pick up on myself that mysteron did is that I AM the one holding all the cards & I'm the one making the decisions, I didn't feel like that until you said it I just felt like he was calling the shots & telling me how it was going to be & I was in turmoil wondering what to do.....I don't feel like that anymore, I can see how our conversation goes tonight & we either sort it out or I can walk away knowing it was my choice. Thanks everyone x

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    Onlyones [sign in to see picture]
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    Good decision.

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    nodrog [sign in to see picture]
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    Jr78 sounds like he's just using you if its not what you want get rid

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    jr78 [sign in to see picture]
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    Nodrog, you're timing to post was perfect because I've just walked out of the restaurant & got a taxi home lol! Playing devils advocate I said "ok then, so am I allowed other Fuck buddies?" Expecting him to say "of course" and he said "i don't think I'd be comfortable with that, I thought you said you'd just be happy with me!"
    Seeeeeeeee ya, I would never have wanted to sleep with anyone else but he's just showed what a hypocrite he is. Time to move on 😊 x

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    LeilaK [sign in to see picture]
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    Jr78 sounds to me like you made the right decision. After reading your post and all the great advice you got from everyone. In my opinion he lead you on, you though it was the beginning of something special. He should have made his intentions clear from the beginning, but then you might not have slept with him. You deserve better 😀

    How are you feeling?

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    jr78 [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm ok leilak, better to have got out now.....He's trying to ring me though so that's doing my head in...I'm just ignoring him x

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    Terri JJ [sign in to see picture]
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    jr78 wrote:

    I'm ok leilak, better to have got out now.....He's trying to ring me though so that's doing my head in...I'm just ignoring him x

    Stay strong - he doesn't deserve you xx

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    LeilaK [sign in to see picture]
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    Yeah you are right, better to be hurting just a little, rather than have your heart broken.

    Just ignore his calls, buy yourself a new toy off Lovehoney and cheer yourself up 😀

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    jr78 [sign in to see picture]
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    I must have had a premonition...I ordered myself a magic wand thingy today lol! The thought of it will get me through ha ha! I'm disappointed but how can he think that I'm gonna agree to that...cake & eat it spring to mind......Oh well you live & learn. Thanks everyone, you're a lovely bunch x

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    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
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    It looks like you decided to turn left although perhaps not as amicably as intended. T he main thing is that you haven't been hurt.

    It will give you now chance to move on.

    I really think you made the right decision and perhaps saved yourself from really getting hurt badly in the future. You very much deserve someone far better who will care about you and put you first..

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    [suspended user]

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    I noticed this thread the other day, I wish I had opened it sooner.
    I've just read from start to finish and you got some fantastic advice. This fb should of made it clear from the start, so if you'd of decided to continue with him I don't believe you'd ever fully trust him, because he wined and dined you, made you believe you were starting a relationship then hits you with the fb bombshell! If however he'd of been upfront from the beginning you would of known where you stood. From what I've read it foes appear that he's confused/afraid of committing or something similar. However I'm glad you realised you were holding the cards (as a lovely advisor informed you here). It seemed to hit home to you (and him now for sure)!
    I do think you've made a wise decision, and that's what this forums for (advice) there's some wonderful people on here. I'm not usually one for social sites, however the people on here are lovely.

    Have fun with your new best friend magic style :)<3

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