• Losing your virginity

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    innocent-fun [sign in to see picture]
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    So as not to hijack MBE's thread, she got me thinking about something-what constitutes 'losing your virginity'?

    Ok, so I know in a heterosexual relationship it's considered to be when the man penetrates the woman, vaginally with his penis, broadly speaking.

    But what about in homosexual relationships? I honestly don't know and am interested.

    Also, what if you are bi-sexual, do you consider yourself to have lost your virginity twice (to a man and a woman), or just once to your first experience?

    And any other scenarios I haven't mentioned.

    1431262733
    Ink and Kink [sign in to see picture]
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    I lost my virginity to a bloke. But when I slept with my first girlfriend, I say I lost my "girl virginity" I reckon when gay men do it its anal? I could be wrong. But I suppose it's each to there own idea of virginity? Because I also say when I had anal that I lost my "anal virginity" haha. X

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    popk1n [sign in to see picture]
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    I pulled up an old post about this like a week ago haha - great minds think alike ;)

    Im the same, im not sure about female-female virginity what I would class as virginity? Probably just the whole experience.

    I also agree with drurysI02 that I class vaginal and anal virginity separately.

    Its very much each to their own experience.

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    HappilyExperimenting [sign in to see picture]
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    Hmm. I agree with the majority that heterosexual couples lose their virginities when a man's penis enters her vagina.
    For homosexual men I reckon it's when they have anal sex. But for lesbians I have no idea! Anybody else have any ideas on gay women losing their v card?

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    Sanguine_bazaar [sign in to see picture]
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    Virginity is one of those concepts that's very difficult to actually define and actually pin down what it means. Exactly at what point those someone stop being a virgin? Is it any sexual contact, pentration of any sort etc. I think personally it's difficult to define because define what "counts" as sex is difficult to define beyond the basic penis into vagina. It's up to the individual.

    Also on the topic of virginity, the way society has this obessession with it. Is unhealthy and damaging to some people. Speaking personally, I felt broken and like a freak growing up because I never wanted sex, being asexual but not knowing it, so I felt this pressure to lose something I was happier keeping and feeling horrible because of it.

    Sorry if I was rambling
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    myghost [sign in to see picture]
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    For homosexual relationships it could count as anything anal sex, frottage, tribadism, fingering, strap on play, oral sex, masturbating each other

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    lustyjoy [sign in to see picture]
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    Different levels viginity through intercourse.. [edit] back of a car ... classy I know but just wanted it gone
    But remember
    first oral
    First orgasm
    First anal
    First bondage
    With more sentimentality than viginity. .. xx

    1431280252
    innocent-fun [sign in to see picture]
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    I agree that there is an unhealthy obsession with virginity, or losing your virginity. I don't think it's down to society though, I think (like most things) it's the media's doing. Media obsesses about losing your virginity, which makes people talk about it, feel they have to do it (peer pressure, if you like), which in turn keeps the media going on about it - vicious circle. But, like a few people on this forum, I have a huge amount of respect for people that hold on to their virginity for as long as possible, until such time that they truly are ready-physically, mentally and emotionally. I think when we submit our bodies to sex young,no matter how much you think you're ready, we really aren't and it can have more of a negative effect than positive.

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    innocent-fun [sign in to see picture]
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    Definitely not a black & white question - more of a 50 shades of grey? ;-)

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    Briona87 [sign in to see picture]
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    innocent-fun wrote:

    I agree that there is an unhealthy obsession with virginity, or losing your virginity. I don't think it's down to society though, I think (like most things) it's the media's doing. Media obsesses about losing your virginity, which makes people talk about it, feel they have to do it (peer pressure, if you like), which in turn keeps the media going on about it - vicious circle. But, like a few people on this forum, I have a huge amount of respect for people that hold on to their virginity for as long as possible, until such time that they truly are ready-physically, mentally and emotionally. I think when we submit our bodies to sex young,no matter how much you think you're ready, we really aren't and it can have more of a negative effect than positive.

    I don't really thing anything like "physical virginity" or lack thereof should be a reason for anyone to feel ashamed or overly sad - on the other hand, being (nearly) 28 and never having found anyone to date, anyone you could consider "special", that is kind of sad. *sighs*

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    fantasia fairy [sign in to see picture]
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    I agree about the whole virginity as a whole...

    then losing it with a guy and then with a woman so i'm still a virgin in terms of lesbian sex

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    flaneur [sign in to see picture]
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    I've seen this discussed in a thread before where the consensus that oral, hand, anal and normal sex all separately have their own virginity.

    For me though hand sex does not equal loss of virginity, nor does oral or dry humping.

    The only thing that does equal loss of virginity to me is a penis entering a vagina, this scenario applies to a man or a woman. No artificial replicas of such parts count.

    For anal sex though, I really can't decide on how to classify it in virginity terms. It does seem stupid to classify gay men who have never been with a woman as virgins even if they've been in more holes than Tiger Woods.

    Maybe I'll stick to red wings and brown wings.

    Oh I don't know where to start with lesbians' virginity classification.

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    popk1n [sign in to see picture]
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    ShinySparkle wrote:

    I had my virginity stolen from me when I was extremely young (under the legal age) and it was intercourse.

    But...

    I still believe to this day that I was a virgin when I met my partner at school. He didn't know about my ordeal and as far as I was aware, nothing happened. In my eyes, my partner was my first and he was the one to "pop my cherry"

    I see this as losing my virginity over the "stolen" one because that one was non-consensual.

    Im sorry to hear you had to through that. :( You sound like a very strong woman though and you don't seem to have let it affect you how it might have done. Credits to you :) x
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    popk1n [sign in to see picture]
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    Ooops accidentally put my comment in the quote haha

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    VirginAngel [sign in to see picture]
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    I think personally i consider virginity to be lost with penis to vagina, or penis to anus. I guess to me, lesbians remain "virgins" as i don't consider fingers, oral or toys to constitue taking virginity, so for a male it requires vaginal or anal penetrating with their penis, and for a woman having her vagina penetrated with a penis. I don't in any way mean to offend antyone with my view, it's just my own personal justification on what constitutes losing virginity. Should a female try anal sex beore vaginal i would still consider her to be technically a virgin, but more a half virgin, but i doubt many females try anal before vaginal.

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    Marriedscot [sign in to see picture]
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    I personally consider myself to have lost my virginity twice with man and woman. When I put my penis in the woman's vagina and when I orgasmed with a guy.

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    paulsballs [sign in to see picture]
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    i think a penis needs to go into vagina for VIRGINITY to be lost, bit technical bit old fashion just my view

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    darklightq [sign in to see picture]
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    Up until this year I was a virgin, and by that I mean I'd never engaged in any sexual activity of any kind be it with a man or a women.

    Now initally as I learned about sex as a youngster my view was that to loose your virginity meant to have penatrive sex with the opposite sex. As I got a bit older my views never changed or rather I never thought about it enough or at all to question it. For a while this bugged me that I hadn't lost my virginity in the way a lot of people would see it i.e me having sex with a female.

    As I've got older still, I began to embrace a lot more to do with sex and the like. This has made me bi-curious/sexual and expanded my sexual fetishes/desires 10 fold. Because of this I've now realised that there is isn't (To me) one way to loose your virginity but ratther many.

    A few months ago now I happed to engage in some bi fun with a guy eventaully leading to me me pentrating him anally, after initally engaging in some mutual masturbation on a previous ocassion.

    I could say I lost my virginity during penatrive sex with the guy but we've done a little more than that, so I would say that combining everything we done equals what I considerto be me loosing my virginity.

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    BDSM-curious [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm sure you wanted a discussion but if you wanted to read another thread that's basically the same http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/community/forums/sex-tips-and-talk/816890-which-experience-counts-as-losing-your/

    1431302669
    popk1n [sign in to see picture]
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    VirginAngel wrote:

    I think personally i consider virginity to be lost with penis to vagina, or penis to anus. I guess to me, lesbians remain "virgins" as i don't consider fingers, oral or toys to constitue taking virginity, so for a male it requires vaginal or anal penetrating with their penis, and for a woman having her vagina penetrated with a penis. I don't in any way mean to offend antyone with my view, it's just my own personal justification on what constitutes losing virginity. Should a female try anal sex beore vaginal i would still consider her to be technically a virgin, but more a half virgin, but i doubt many females try anal before vaginal.

    I had anal the week before vaginal :) i would class them as two different virginities. Don't why, just how I feel.

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