• Need some Guidance

    1428520907
    SensualFire [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 922
    • Joined: 6 May 2013

    This my be of assistance to others who read what I am about to say:

    Ok so I am on line quite a lot, I have quite a few contacts on my skype, none of which are family but people I have met on line over the years and created good friendships with.

    Any way to cut a long story short, I added this guy to my skype, who I knew from fetlife. Yes I know that this sounds a little shady, but I had the feeling (at the time) that everything is ok, he is nice, conversations have been good in the past..

    Now though he wants to see me on cam, and mic up (nothing kinky, well not on my side) and he is wanting me to do this all the time, I know he likes me, he has said so, BUT I have to say its one sided due to me being with some one. This guy is asking me to watch him play with him self.

    To an extent I found it flattering, I mean well..yeh..Now though I am feeling a bit I have said no I have side stepped him and not answered, but he still persists.

    Not like I have known the guy too long, so I am contemplating if I should remove him and block, not that I am offended but I do feel used and disrespected as of late. Like what happened to conversation etc?

    Anyone had this type of experience,?

    Need some guidance here

    TY

    1428522020
    wildflower [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3811
    • Joined: 17 Jul 2013

    I haven't experienced this personally but my advice would be that as you don't feel 100% comfortable with this to tell him no outright one more time and if he still persists then block him.
    I can understand you being flattered, its nice when someone clearly finds you attractive but this is going a bit beyond a bit of harmless flirting.
    He obviously thinks he can wear you down by persisting but if he can't take no for an answer then he'll have to accept the consequences of you blocking him.
    I'll bet there's plenty of other people who'd be happy to chat to you without all this hassle!
    Hope this helps x

    1428522156
    Terri JJ [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 11626
    • Joined: 20 Aug 2014

    wildflower wrote:

    I haven't experienced this personally but my advice would be that as you don't feel 100% comfortable with this to tell him no outright one more time and if he still persists then block him.
    I can understand you being flattered, its nice when someone clearly finds you attractive but this is going a bit beyond a bit of harmless flirting.
    He obviously thinks he can wear you down by persisting but if he can't take no for an answer then he'll have to accept the consequences of you blocking him.
    I'll bet there's plenty of other people who'd be happy to chat to you without all this hassle!
    Hope this helps x

    Great advice :)

    1428522157
    Terri JJ [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 11626
    • Joined: 20 Aug 2014

    Double post

    1428522189
    SensualFire [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 922
    • Joined: 6 May 2013

    Thanks Wildflower, much appreciated

    I do find it a bit..manipulative..I can always feel when some one is trying to get me to do something, certainly if I am not in the right frame to do it, or act upon it even. I mean he is in the US I am in the UK,..

    At first I was wondering that it was me, when I felt, ..`like seriously` can you not see me for who I am, not what I am. He is pm`ing me now on skype and I am ignoring him, as what he is saying it leading in the same direction.

    1428522400
    wildflower [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 3811
    • Joined: 17 Jul 2013

    Don't allow him to make you feel intimidated you're doing the right thing by ignoring him as he still hadn't got the message has he? It's not you ,it's him x

    1428522492
    DreamOfTheEndless [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 668
    • Joined: 23 Oct 2010

    wildflower nailed it completely spot on. In any circumstance like this, I'd go with your gut.

    1428522839
    SensualFire [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 922
    • Joined: 6 May 2013

    Yeh. I am, I feel its rather one sided, so in which case I am not interested

    1428523605
    FrozenAngel [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1534
    • Joined: 20 May 2011

    I've had someone like this before; we were friends and then he would make comments about how he found me attractive, that I turned him on; that he's thought about me whilst masturbating and has asked me to watch him.

    The thing I find is shooting it down right away. It was a case with me where I told him, that I do not appricate him saying these things to me, that I am in a realtionship and find it not only disrespectful to me, but also to my partner. And that we can still be friends, the moment that he mentions anything like this again I will block him and remove him.

    It lasted a few weeks and then he got blocked and removed. I won't tolerate that kind of behaviour.

    1428523853
    SensualFire [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 922
    • Joined: 6 May 2013

    Yes you need to draw a line, a healthy one that that. You did what needed to be done, I could go on and on about this, how I feel in relation to how guys and wome act, but this is neither here or there.

    I feel I need to draw the line with this guy, regardless that its nice to feel liked, I am unwilling to lower my standards and have my self confidence knocked. If that can be understood

    1428525043
    Naughty Miss K [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 884
    • Joined: 20 Nov 2012

    I get what you mean about drawing the line, I really wish when I had been in similar shoes to yours that I had known to stand up and just get him out my life by blocking etc.

    Don't feel bad for being firm with him, stand your ground and make sure whatever you line for being comfortable is, stick with it :)

    My advise from the info you've given, block him.

    1428525568
    SensualFire [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 922
    • Joined: 6 May 2013

    Thanks Naughty :) xx

    1428526366
    Scorpius12 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 6364
    • Joined: 18 Dec 2007

    wildflower wrote:

    I haven't experienced this personally but my advice would be that as you don't feel 100% comfortable with this to tell him no outright one more time and if he still persists then block him.
    I can understand you being flattered, its nice when someone clearly finds you attractive but this is going a bit beyond a bit of harmless flirting.
    He obviously thinks he can wear you down by persisting but if he can't take no for an answer then he'll have to accept the consequences of you blocking him.
    I'll bet there's plenty of other people who'd be happy to chat to you without all this hassle!
    Hope this helps x

    +1 I agree this is great advice. Always go with your intuition Hun :) xx

    1428526410
    SensualFire [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 922
    • Joined: 6 May 2013

    Yeh I will let you all know how it goes, if he keeps persisting I will end up removing

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.