• quietly optimistic

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    Crumpler [sign in to see picture]
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    Awwww I just love happy endings!! Big grins from me to you!! All the best!! Will there be wedding bells...?

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    Lovehoney - Jessica [sign in to see picture]
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    ^^^ what he said!!

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    naughty mum [sign in to see picture]
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    Tbh... At this rate... There may be๐Ÿ˜Š
    Don't forget, we have both been married before in long term, so jumping in on the hitching side might be not as appealing as it could have been... But we are definitely commiting to each other. I love the fact that he is planning things so far ahead, so he I'd not of the mindset that it will not last.
    It is so comforting to have someone who wants to be with you. It is such a boost in the old confidence arm๐Ÿ˜Š
    Parents like the sound of him too, although they want to meet him..so a trip ti Devon is on the cards soon!

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    sassykitten;) [sign in to see picture]
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    ** off to go looking at hats**

    Best of luck nm

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    delilahxx [sign in to see picture]
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    So pleased things are going so well for you NM, it's lovely to read :)

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    naughty mum [sign in to see picture]
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    Trying to get the boys ready for tomorrow... And my 14 yr old son is bring particularly obnoxious. All I ask is he have a shower, and not wear the trousers he came to me in from his dads, which have been worn right through in the crotch.there are massive holes in them... And he thinks it is totally OK to do so. I have no idea when he last washed, and he refuses to shower( he had been shouting me down on this matter for last hour) and tbh...I am embarrassed to call him my son.
    My ex has allowed him to become some smelly grungy Neanderthal... Wearing holed clothes... And a stinky Attitude... I want a good first impression... And I am afraid he is going to turn up and be snotty....๐Ÿ˜ข

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    steevo68 [sign in to see picture]
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    Just let him be. Is only being rebellious dont react and let him spoil things. Hope it goes well

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    BigBikeGuy [sign in to see picture]
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    Mine has a girlfriend, you can't get him out the shower these day. Sorry not much help...

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    naughty mum [sign in to see picture]
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    Do any one have a 14 yr old son who goes weeks without washing or combing their hair? I try my best to encourage him...but I get shouted down all the time...tbh...I really could do without his negative attitude around me. I ready do not want to be dragged down again ...his dad did a fab job of putting g me in a dark place..I really don't want my son repeating the same scenario. Tbh..if he continues I will have to ask him to stay with his dad in future... But the mum in me says I have to love him unconditionally, and ride the many storms he brings to my shore.

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    Vanessa8 [sign in to see picture]
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    Can his siblings influence that? He is rebelling against you and frankly the more you push the worse it may get. uggg I wish I had better advice.

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    popk1n [sign in to see picture]
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    Teenagers are mean I'm afraid. From the sounds of your past, you're particularly perceptive to the harshness. Tell him it upsets you. Teenagers are harsh but not heartless.

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    wildflower [sign in to see picture]
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    Hi NM , sorry to read that your son is being a pain in the backside but he's probably just going through that rebellious teenage phase where he'll automatically want to do the opposite of anything that you say .
    One of my sons went through a stage of not washing or changing his clothes often enough ( and he really did start to smell !) After a while I realised that nagging wasn't going to work so I just let him get on with it and eventually he came round the idea that personal hygiene wasn't so bad ( probably peer pressure from his mates telling him he was smelly !)
    He was about 12 or 13 at the time .
    Try not to let him wind you up , he will come round in the end.

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    naughty mum [sign in to see picture]
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    Yep I could be part of his problem...thing is he has been like this for years๐Ÿ˜ž
    I think being a teen has magnified it.. Thing is he has a determined stubborn streak a mile wide...and refuses to reason anything sensibly.
    If there is likely to be any problem in my future with my new man it is likely to be if my eldest flares up.
    As my new man is a bit shorter than me( and my son is taller, broader and I. Size 12s at the age of 14!) And he is a soft gentle soul I don't see him being able to stand his ground against a stroppy teen.
    I really want everything to go well...I'm so nervous...I can't sleep

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    Vanessa8 [sign in to see picture]
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    can you take a sleep aid NM? I am just worried that our nerves are going to be frazzled on no sleep. I am sending positive vibes our way on all this. Frankly your new man sounds like he is very thoughtful and understanding and into you, so I am sure a bit of teenage angst isn't going to scare him away.

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    naughty mum [sign in to see picture]
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    Well...we have just got back from our day at cattle country, and everything went far better than I could have hoped๐Ÿ˜Šmy 14 yr old teen did stay up longer than he should have last night,and was a bit hard to prize out of bed this morning, but saying that..he wore trousers with no holes in...brushed his hair and used...deodorant!!!(๐Ÿ˜ฎ)
    He made an effort of sorts...and went out today with a bit more positive vibes than last night.
    My youngest was up with the larks!! He couldn't wait to meet his kids.
    The meet up was a bit of sizing up to start... Then the wooden fort..turn they all started to play tag..and things started to loosen up and they all started mingling together well.
    Day went on in that vein, with the 3 eldest playing with my partners youngest, and smiles and laughter all around. The two youngest, who I thought would have an issue with their dad seeing someone other than their mum, were fab!
    Both of us got a time or two to have a kiss and a cuddle, and relax a d enjoy 5 kids running around playing, and practically bring a big family overnight!.
    My man commented that he thinks we have no issues about the Kidd and each other, and that they look like they will get on well, and it looks promising for us to move on, taking it to the point where we might contemplate moving in at some point.
    I find the firmness in my partners conviction to our ongoing relationship refreshing, and somewhat humbling.
    I don't ever recall my ex being so devoted to making plans for our future like this. All for littl' ol' me๐Ÿ˜Š when you have had such a low self esteem about yourself for so long, and you have had a partner constantly putting you down for 20 yrs, it is so nice to finally have someone who wants to move all obstacles to be with me.๐Ÿ˜Š
    I have such a warm feeling in my heart, I feel like I am glowing like the " fallen star" in stardust!!๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜€
    I love his kids, and I could quite happily take on looking after them when they come over..and I think having a couple of younger kids will bring out the playfulness in mine, and hopefully mellow my eldest a bit.
    Wow! So much happened in such a short time! We are taming my boys on a shortish hike on Sunday, so hoping the weather holds.
    First time my kids will see my man at my house..

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    wildflower [sign in to see picture]
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    So glad that it all went so well and great news on the use of deodorant !

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    Vanessa8 [sign in to see picture]
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    wildflower wrote:

    So glad that it all went so well and great news on the use of deodorant !

    +1 and I hope you get some rest now NM!

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    naughty mum [sign in to see picture]
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    I will do my best to sleep tonight....was a busy day...but worth iti ๐Ÿ˜Ši am so glad things went as well as they did, and it pretty much gives us both the green light that our kids are mentally ready for another person in their parent's life. It is quite a relief that we have got past this point with no hitches.
    My future with my new man is going from strength to strength... I really cantvbelieve my luck with him. Does it really happen for shy, self conscious, still overweight lasses in their forties?
    ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š

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    BigBikeGuy [sign in to see picture]
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    Another positive step forward NM, great to hear ๐Ÿ˜Š

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    naughty mum [sign in to see picture]
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    My partner has asked me to keep a date in Sept free...as a birthday treat...oo! I'm excited! I never got even a card from my ex when it was my birthday...to have someone think up a treat for my birthday is heavenly!
    I so love the way he makes me feel.
    I thought my luck would have run out by now..but he is still keen as the first day we met..someone pinch me!๐Ÿ˜„

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