• My wife wants a spanking

    1425989604
    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 5934
    • Joined: 7 Jan 2014

    Since reading 50 shades and watching the film and other films like the Secretary , my wife has developed a liking of being spanked. Prior to then I just occasionally gave her a light erotic spank as part of foreplay.

    However now she wants to dress up as a student and wants a more disciplined type spanking as oposed to the erotic types.

    Whilst I am quite happy to carry this out , I am just a bit nervous of making a mess of it for her as I have never done this type of activity before.

    Safe words have been established ie Red,Amber and Green.

    For the roleplay I was thinking of some sort of detention .

    For the offence I was thinking of leaving it up to her by asking the question " Why are you on detention ? " and taking it from there or should I be thinking of an appropriate offence ?

    I presume its a good idea to do the initial spankings over clothes until she is "warmed up enough" to take it on the bare.

    My other worry is at what stage is enough or is it a good ieda to set a straight tarriff.

    Other tips and suggestions I would also welcome .

    Thanks guys

    1425990617
    LadyS [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 935
    • Joined: 4 Jul 2012

    Oooh I got spanked as a naughty schoolgirl and it was amazing.

    I think the outfit is a big help, by shirt is quite scruffy and shows my waist, the skirt is super short. So I got repirmanded for my uniform not adhering to 'the rules'. I also got sked why I was so behind with my work. Answer: I couldn't pay attention in class. Why not? Sir is just to sexy and my mind wanders. he then asked what I thought about etc. Which gives you chance to talk about doing dirty think with the 'teacher' which is definitely a spankable offence, lol.

    I've never been spanked over clothes, so can't comment on that. I think so long as you start off gentle and work your way up to harder blows then bare bottom should be fine if that's more appealing.

    I would say enough is when you've both gotten so horny you have to stop to do other things, or that's what the traffic light system is for I guess. You could always stay in role and say 'do you think you've learned your lesson yet?' If she thinks it's been enough for her she can say yes and you can move on, if she says she hasn't then you can carry on.

    x

    1425990846
    Lovehoney - Jess Wilde [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2134
    • Joined: 30 Nov 2012

    It sounds like you've already thought quiet a lot about this and made some great plans, so that's fab! 

    My main piece of advice would be to make sure you focus each spank on areas of skin which feel most pleasurable. Make sure you aim for soft fleshy parts of the buttocks and thighs, and never hit high up on the bottom/back/kidneys as that can be really painful and dangerous.

    For best results, aim each strike for the skin where the bumcheeks meet the thighs aka 'the sweet spot' and that should provide her wit the perfect balance between pain and pleasure, and send thrilling vibrations through her most sensitive spots. 

    Most importantly, communicate and enjoy! 

    1425992616
    scarab9 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 220
    • Joined: 1 May 2012

    Hi, sounds like you're in for some fun! My OH hadn't been spanked and I gave her a few quick slaps on the bum during sex once (potentially while tipsy!) and she let me know later that she really like it. It turned out she'd been fantasising about it. I was equal parts exceited and nervous about this, as the thought turned me on but I really didn't know what to do.

    The hard part that everyone has a different taste for it, some want it light and maybe just enough to sting occaisionally, others want to be pushed to their limit and wake up feeling it. Some want it as part of a rollplay, others like it spontaneous. Is her making noises of being in pain a good thing or a bad thing etc. It may be she doesn't even know what she wants in reality and so giving her exactly what she says could go wrong!

    while that can be offputting, don't get caught up in worrying about it, don't think about it as having to be perfect first time. You don't have to jump in to a fantasy with both feet and get it spot on, you can build up to it and play around the edges until you're both comfortable. It sounds like the ritual turns her on, ie. focusing on the spanking. So either as roleplay (eg. as above regarding school stuff) or based on something silly from real life if you don't roleplay easily (maybe you guys take the mick out of each other day to day or something and you can punish her for cheeky comments) choose a reason, put her over your knee, or tell her to get on her knees, or however you feel most comfortable.

    then start slow, go off her reactions, and don't worry about having to be all domly dom and taking her to some imagined limits. If it's a fantasy she's new to she'll be horny as hell regardless and it's doubtful either of you will want to go on for too long or get too in to it before you jump each other.

    Afterwards is then the time to get her to talk about more details and let you know if what you did was enough or whether now she's had a tast e in reality she has a better idea of how she'd like it to go next time.

    1425993711
    AsYouWish! [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1283
    • Joined: 9 Oct 2012

    I think I need to get my OH to the cinema!
    Have fun.

    1426031259
    j&lxxxx [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 201
    • Joined: 13 May 2012

    I agree with above, start gentle and slowly build up, also if she's dressed as as a school girl, start over her skirt, then over the knickers before removeing them, and spanking her bare bottom. Afterwards tuck the skirt into the waist band and tell her to stand in the corner for a while, showing off her red bottom, before moving on to other things.

    If your taking on the roll of teacher/head I suggest you dress as such, shirt and tie, tshirt and ripped jeans doesn't have same effect.

    Make sure she counts every stroke, and says thank you for her punishment.

    Afterwards have a chat about what you both liked/disliked, and if you do it again, then maybe you can add implements to use, if you both happy.

    1426033522
    Cuddlekins [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 533
    • Joined: 18 Feb 2014

    Maybe using some http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=25808

    As you can use one before and one after it's great.

    Otherwise you could always use this afterwards http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=26090

    1426035075
    Woodhall [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 1
    • Joined: 11 Jan 2015

    Along with the traffic light system, I find a pair of handcuffs, a flogger and some muscle power works, whether it's giving or receiving. Ha

    1426067479
    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 5934
    • Joined: 7 Jan 2014

    Thanks for the tips guys .

    She will be dressed for the part as this she likes doing. she also likes the new French Maid Uniform that she bought but havn't seen her in that yet. Strange one really because she doesn't like fancy dress parties . Maybe its because she might reveal too much in public .

    As regards implements I will have a paddle which one side is fur ( normally used in our foreplay) and the other side leather. If she keeps saying green all the time , I may have to use the leather side. However the paddle will be kept in reserve as I just wish to use my hand on this occasson.

    Because we have a teenage son who's idea of socialising is talking through headphones to his mates via a PS4 , we don't get chance to do a lot of "noisy" sex or roll playing . Therefore we have both booked a Friday off to give us a bit of "us" time, which will give us the house to ourselves withouit any interruption.I may even insist my breakfast is prepared by the maid !

    I am hoping to use the days leading up to this for a bit of psychology if you guys think its a good idea. I was also thinking serving her a formal notice in writing to attend detention and unform inspection and what the consequencies might be for any irregularities .

    Please keep th tips coming .

    Many thanks

    1426627816
    Tussilago [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 45
    • Joined: 30 Apr 2012

    As long as you trust each other and communicate throughly not much should be able go wrong. If you need inspiration or want more insight into others' experience in S&M fetlife.com is an excellent social forum for that kind of stuff.

    1426715438
    saucey21 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 142
    • Joined: 19 Mar 2013

    I also like a bit of rubbing and stimulation on my vagina area in between a few spankings especially if they are good hard slaps.

    1426793792
    Beatrix [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Captain
    • Posts: 11
    • Joined: 15 Mar 2015

    Lovehoney - Jess wrote:

    It sounds like you've already thought quiet a lot about this and made some great plans, so that's fab!

    My main piece of advice would be to make sure you focus each spank on areas of skin which feel most pleasurable. Make sure you aim for soft fleshy parts of the buttocks and thighs, and never hit high up on the bottom/back/kidneys as that can be really painful and dangerous.

    For best results, aim each strike for the skin where the bumcheeks meet the thighs aka 'the sweet spot' and that should provide her wit the perfect balance between pain and pleasure, and send thrilling vibrations through her most sensitive spots.

    Most importantly, communicate and enjoy!

    ^^Love this advice^^

    If you are worried about when to stop then talk out the whole scene before you start. Ask your OH when she might like to stop and also how hard she might want to be spanked. Also don't just pull her panties down and start slapping, build up to it and start over her clothes and also rub, soothe, and grab her bum between spanks.

    Also don't forget about aftercare both physical and mental. Depending on how hard you spank her you could bruise her and while at the time was enjoyable it could leave her feeling like "what the hell just happened to me". Reassure her and comfort her straight after and talk about it again later on when the whole expereience has been fully processed.

    As for physical aftercare a nice massage using some soothing lotion might do the trick. ;)

    1427108401
    mysteron [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 5934
    • Joined: 7 Jan 2014

    Hi Guys

    As you have given brilliant advice I thought I would fill you in on how it went. It didn't quite finish as I expected it TBH but thats good as you will see later. .

    I served her wth a Punishment/Detention notice on the Mondy by slipping it into her work bag with a duplicate placed on her bedside cabinent. I noticed all week that she was a bit nervous and twitchy so I guess it was playing with her mind.

    At 10.00am sharp on Friday( we had both booked the day off) there was a full uniform inspection in the headmasters office .She was dressed in a typical St Trinians fashion with pleted skirt with stockings as opposed to socks and ribbons in her hair .I forced her to stand to attention using the new riding crop bought from Lovehoney as a means of correcting her for her posture and gave her a sharp crack on the thigh for giggling. This was the only time an implement was used .

    So I could feel her wriggling I only wore a pair of boxer shorts and and shirt. I pulled her by the hair( she likes this) bent her over my knee and applied light slaps to her behind over her skirt and slowly built up the pessure, She wanted it harder and informed me so by repeating the word Green until I built it up strenghthwise and got an Amber. By this point my hand was ready for droping off .

    I decided to order some corner time in order I could rest my hand!

    After about 10 minutes the process was repeated but this time over her pants which were old fashioned white Sloggis . After pulling her pants tightly to occupy her crack, I could see visible signs of her behind begin to pinken a bit with a touch of red , so again ordered corner time. I orderred her to stand in the corner with her hands on her head touching the wall with her nose. At this point I made myself a Latte with the coffee machine in our bedroom which was being used as the "headmasters" office.

    After I had finished my coffe I ordrered her to turn around and remove her skirt This she did and allowed it to drop to the floor and step out of it . It was at this point it happened. She couldn't hold back any longer and just jumped me and my boxers were sent flying through the air . We made really passionate love with an intensity we havn't had for years..

    After which we cuddled each other and showered together and went for a pub lunch . She admitted she was so turned on after the spanking sessions and her legs went to jelly on my strictness which she hasn't seen before .

    So to conclude we had a great time and its is something we will do again .

    Luv you all !

    1427109650
    Hopelessly Horny [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 586
    • Joined: 16 Jun 2010

    Lovehoney - Jess wrote:

    It sounds like you've already thought quiet a lot about this and made some great plans, so that's fab!

    My main piece of advice would be to make sure you focus each spank on areas of skin which feel most pleasurable. Make sure you aim for soft fleshy parts of the buttocks and thighs, and never hit high up on the bottom/back/kidneys as that can be really painful and dangerous.

    For best results, aim each strike for the skin where the bumcheeks meet the thighs aka 'the sweet spot' and that should provide her wit the perfect balance between pain and pleasure, and send thrilling vibrations through her most sensitive spots.

    Most importantly, communicate and enjoy!

    +1 Avoid landing a spanking too high as that's just painful without the pleasure and can be dangerous as Jess has said.

    But you seem to have great ground work in place so go for it and ENJOY 😊

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.