• any tips on how to ease into anal?

    1423000632
    *miss*foxy* [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 16
    • Joined: 18 Feb 2009

    i hope this post is ok im a newbie and not sure how this works

    HI all, im really looking for tips to explore into a bit of anal.

    Iv had anal before with the "oops wrong hole" which hurt like hell and the boyfriend taking advantage when i was that drunk i didnt feel anything so after a few bad experiences i worry about it hurting or having no control. After 8 years of being with my husband we want to try something new, hes tried a finger but i cant go any further than that, not that i dont want to as i really do. SO does any one happen to have any tips to help make this easier and a enjoyable moment that i want forget on good terms, i really want this but i seeing my hubby get really excited is a massive turn on and i want to give him something which hes never experienced.

    1423000658
    Sum Sub [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 4218
    • Joined: 4 Dec 2012

    Lube lube lube lube lube lube lube and lube.

    1423001092
    j&lxxxx [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 201
    • Joined: 13 May 2012

    Lots of lube, with a finger, when ready still with lots of lube use a SMALL butt plug, then slowly build up in size with lots of lube.

    1423001130
    *miss*foxy* [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 16
    • Joined: 18 Feb 2009

    thank you :) do you happen to know the best position to ease into it that doesnt involve me on top, hubby is more of a missionary man

    1423001265
    *miss*foxy* [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 16
    • Joined: 18 Feb 2009

    ill try that, my hubby wanted to use a love egg and i said no and there looks like some good ones on here, ill have to get ordering, thank you :)

    1423002510
    BDSM-curious [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Brigadier
    • Posts: 584
    • Joined: 30 Aug 2013

    Where were you thinking of using a love egg? I'm just concerned you were thinking of using it as an anal toy, since that was what your thread was started about.

    1423048677
    *miss*foxy* [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 16
    • Joined: 18 Feb 2009

    hi ooo no i didnt want to use the love egg lol, the post previous mentioned trying butt plugs and i commented on how ill try that as my hbby wanted to use the love egg up the bottom but i said no to that

    1423050015
    CVR92 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 160
    • Joined: 5 Aug 2012

    LH provide anal lube, which is brilliant, some of them have desensitising properties which reduces the 'sting' on insertion, but allot full sensitivity inside.
    I would suggest a finger first, perhaps get a begginers butt plug to move onto which is how I started... this is a good introduction to anal play, I would suggest building up the size off the buttplug before anal sex.

    1423050494
    Scorpius12 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 6260
    • Joined: 18 Dec 2007

    The best advice I can give is to take things slowly and stop immediately if anything hurts or is uncomfortable. Make sure you use lots of lube - this is essential – I use either Sliquid Sassy or Maximus - but there are lots of anal lubes on LH to choose from:

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=11373

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=13084

    It may take several sessions before you are able to penetrate fully - just take as long as you need and build up very slowly. Just get used to playing with your fingers for a couple of sessions and enjoy those sensations before you try again - you can try to build up to 2 fingers then 3 fingers.

    Also, have a read through this LH guide which may be useful :) xx

    http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/sex/better-anal-sex/buyers-guide/first-time-anal-sex-guide/

    1423052435
    magicnumber69 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 277
    • Joined: 17 Jun 2013

    There's not a lot I can add that others haven't already suggested, but just to add my bit, both me and my currently long-distance gf are very interested in trying anal. I've been playing with my bum for a while, while my gf is a complete novice, other than, like yourself, using a finger.

    For Xmas, I got her a gift bag with a beginners butt plug and some anal lube, which is thicker in consistency than regular lube.

    In my experience and hers, it begins in the mind; feeling like you want to do it and being relaxed is very important. Because I'm not so - ummm - 'flexible', I used the tip of my plug, well coated in lube to gently tease around the entrance, which serves the dual purpose of lubing the anus and also getting it used to having something back there. As I grew used to the sensations, I'd push in the plug a little further. If it ever gets at all uncomfortable, or even painful (which it never did for me), withdraw the plug a little and just continue at a rate you're happy with, you should eventually get the whole thing in (and personally, I love the sensation of when I close around the neck of the plug from 'full stretch' - delicious!)

    Everybody progresses at different rates and given your past experience, it might take you a little longer to make the mental association between having something in your bum and it feeling pleasurable. Atm, my gf has made a couple of attempts and is just getting accustomed to something being in ther, yet seems to be enjoying it. She's still looking forward to having me back there, so at least she's not discouraged. I hope you have a similar experience. Don't rush it and don't let anxiety get in the way and you should be ready to progress to something a bit bigger.

    Good luck! ^^

    1423057901
    Bobandelsie [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 1
    • Joined: 1 Oct 2013

    Latex gloves and lube - the latex avoids any sharp nails or rough skin causing pain in that hyper sensitive place. Best position is you on your back with your knees on your chest and hubby can then offer fingers, tongue, whatever anal toys u want to try.

    1423058236
    Lady Ness [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2258
    • Joined: 16 May 2010

    Probably a bit of a random tip, but I've found massaging the butt cheeks (or in some cases spanking), can help with the process as it brings blood to the area and helps the muscles relax. Same with massaging the perineum.

    A vibrator can also be used massaging around these areas and the anus to help relax the body, but some find certain type of vibrations off putting.

    Next would be not to worry about mess. Just remember all forms of sex is messy really, and worrying about it can ruin the mood.

    Lube is a good one too, but there are some people who do not need lube at all, but you'll learn this as you learn more about your own body during anal.

    1428608929
    *miss*foxy* [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major
    • Posts: 16
    • Joined: 18 Feb 2009

    hi all, its been a while since iv logged on but i wanted to thank you all for your tips, WE did it,

    we decided to just ease into it so im sorry for tmi lol, but iv missed out on so much its only took 8 years into our relationship lol, he used a dildo on me first whilst i had my fav bullet at hand than with plenty of lube and whilst i was busy he put the buttplug in, no sooner had he inserted it i had climaxed and then he penertrated me, i thought the whole thing was so hot, my lovely hubby was just excited hed popped his anal cherry (by doing me lol),

    1428611328
    Subdom27 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1478
    • Joined: 27 May 2012

    Sum Sub wrote:

    Lube lube lube lube lube lube lube and lube.

    Not sure you quite got your point across there Sum Sub! 😉
    1428655326
    Bobbaford [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 243
    • Joined: 20 Aug 2011

    Well done for doing it! It's a great feeling, to give and receive!
    Now you should propose returning the favour so he knows what it's like to be filled up 😉
    And then double penetration, hubby in one hole and dildo in another... Just DO NOT swap half way through unless using condoms

    1428670736
    Jennylafay [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 50
    • Joined: 13 Mar 2015

    As most said above, lots and lots of lube, and start small.

    A finger or a small plug then build up if you like it

    1428671355
    Rachel_1991 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Colonel
    • Posts: 81
    • Joined: 19 Nov 2014

    Sum Sub wrote:

    Lube lube lube lube lube lube lube and lube.

    +1 to this.. My partner is huge and I can't take him straight away.. He fingers me and after lots of play I want to take more so he adds more lube and more fingers until i am relaxed and open enough to take him.. Usually after 15 mins of play.. Iv also invested in the LH anal beads and the vibrating wand which are great for the warm up! Hope this helps x
    1428672932
    DavidB1986 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2192
    • Joined: 11 Feb 2009

    *miss*foxy* wrote:

    thank you :) do you happen to know the best position to ease into it that doesnt involve me on top, hubby is more of a missionary man

    I know you said you don't want a position where you are on top - however for exploring with anal sex, i've found that that position is the best for getting used to everything because YOU are in control. You control how deep he goes, and you can move out of the way easily if it's too much or too painful for you. Once you get used to the sensation then feel free to try any position you want. I regret the first time I had anal sex, I let them take control and had me face down on the bed whilst they did their thing - I wasn't in control and it was a horrible, painful experience.

    1428682631
    Blueeyes82 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1472
    • Joined: 19 Sep 2010

    relax relax relax and find the best position.

    At first, being on my knees, 1 leg cocked up on the bed and bent over, made it easier. I also found that after a few glasses of vino, it relaxed me

    1428696212
    MissNoir [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 884
    • Joined: 30 Jun 2014

    Communication is essential, if either are uncomfortable in anyway you need to tell each other, take it slow, do not rush things, lube like you've never lubed before and relax, enjoy it. It gets better over time as your body gets used to it, experiment with positins and see what is best for you too ^_^

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.