• Virginity...

    1422909649
    Kassandra Silverbullet [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant Colonel
    • Posts: 32
    • Joined: 13 Dec 2014

    Can you take yor own virginity?

    Cause if you can't then I am a virgin?...

    1422909967
    fairehlights [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 581
    • Joined: 18 Jan 2014

    Virginity is a daft and outdated concept used to shame people for not having sex.

    You can define it however you please. Some people say only penis-in-vagina sex counts, some include oral, some include masturbation.... Blah blah.

    If it's something that matters to you, you'll likely have an opinion of it lurking somewhere.
    If you want to say you're a virgin, go for it.
    If you don't? Well, noone is probably ever going to ask outside of teenage truth or dare, so you're probablygood.

    Also, I know there are some members on here that will slate me for my first statement. I totally respect your decisions not to have sex, or to wait to have sex, or whatever. That's fine.
    I do not and cannot support the social stigma around (paticularly female) virginity and the shame in losing, as well as the hypocritical pressure to do thevery same thing.

    1422910238
    Subdom27 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 1478
    • Joined: 27 May 2012

    Well said!

    1422910844
    Bubblevicious [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Lieutenant
    • Posts: 30
    • Joined: 29 Jan 2015

    You talk a lot of sense, Fairehlights!

    1422911396
    LibraLover [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 713
    • Joined: 16 Jul 2014

    fairehlights wrote:

    Virginity is a daft and outdated concept used to shame people for not having sex.

    You can define it however you please. Some people say only penis-in-vagina sex counts, some include oral, some include masturbation.... Blah blah.

    If it's something that matters to you, you'll likely have an opinion of it lurking somewhere.
    If you want to say you're a virgin, go for it.
    If you don't? Well, noone is probably ever going to ask outside of teenage truth or dare, so you're probablygood.

    Also, I know there are some members on here that will slate me for my first statement. I totally respect your decisions not to have sex, or to wait to have sex, or whatever. That's fine.
    I do not and cannot support the social stigma around (paticularly female) virginity and the shame in losing, as well as the hypocritical pressure to do thevery same thing.

    I think I agree but you're first sentence is confusing! I think virginity can be used to shame people (especially girls) for having sex, but can also be used to shame people (more so guys) for not having sex. Female virginity is way overvalued. The whole concept implies that it's only men who enjoy sex. If someone told me they were a virgin I would assume that didn't include masturbation though, so I would say you're still a virgin. But don't let other people's ideas decide when you should loose it (don't feel pressured to loose or keep it)!
    1422911885
    fairehlights [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 581
    • Joined: 18 Jan 2014

    Ugh, bollox. Thanks for noticing Libra, I missed half a sentence!
    The concept is flaky at best, and used to shame either and any which way.
    I don't have enough braincells for much intelligent posting atm :')

    1422911977
    LadyS [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 935
    • Joined: 4 Jul 2012

    I always felt a bit odd about my 'virginity'. By the time I'd slept with a bloke, I'd already had two sexual relationships with females. So I felt somewhat experiences just hadn't tried the penis style of things, lol. Which to be honest wasnlt all that amazing anyway, lol. Certainly didn't make me think I'd been missing out. x

    1422912221
    LibraLover [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 713
    • Joined: 16 Jul 2014

    Haha fairehlights, no, its a very intelligent post! :)

    1422912784
    Young and fun95 [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Field Marshall
    • Posts: 2748
    • Joined: 6 Jun 2014

    I think people are shamed for being virgins, at least there are where I live. It's rediculous to give a name to something you haven't done. There's no specific name for people who haven't been on a roller coaster. I lied to my friends about losing mine, but didn't actually lose it till I was 18. It wasn't special, quite boring.

    what I'm trying to say is, it doesn't matter, if you associate as being a virgin, cool, if not, cool. It's up to you, just don't feel as though whether you are or aren't contributes any value to you. There are more important things to worry about. Losing your virginity is made out to be some massive life changing event. It isn't. You just feel deflated becuase you don't suddenly feel like a (wo)/man

    1422914391
    flaneur [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 571
    • Joined: 23 Apr 2013

    This reminds me about the one thing about the definition of virginity I haven't figured out and that is whether anal sex equals loss of virginity. I categorise it as a different kind of virginity. I don't count any form of masturbation or oral for loss of virginity.

    For me virgin is a word I grew to hate. For a guy the longer you keep it, the more of a failure you feel. For a woman it seems to have conflicting emotions, and can be used as a word to shame both men and women. But most people's problems with virginity usually exist in their own head.

    1422914512
    flaneur [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Major General
    • Posts: 571
    • Joined: 23 Apr 2013

    double post ignore

    Post a reply to this thread

    Please sign in to post messages to the forum.