• Advice please?

    candyflossboss [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: Officer Cadet
    • Posts: 2
    • Joined: 21 Mar 2014

    Never really posted on here before and I'm sort of nervous because this is all sort of weird to me, but I was hoping I could get some advice.

    I'm a 20 year old female and, as far as I know, completely a virgin and a single pringle. I've been masturbating for a long time but it's only ever been clitoral, but I'd like to try actual insertion with a dildo. I've bought a few of the small begginer type dildos, but I'm really struggling to use them. In the past when I've tried inserting just a finger I haven't been too comfortable either :/

    When I've tried I've made sure to get as comfortable as possible, to orgasm with my clit once or twice like I'm used to so I'm turned on and wet, and I've used lube. But still even just one finger hurts and I can't get it in very far, so when I tried a dildo last night it just didn't go too well at all. I couldn't get it in too far and it hurt and I bled, and I just don't know what to do.

    Is there something wrong with me? I have no idea if my hymen is intact considering I've never managed to get in too far, and I don't know how deep you have to go to reach it. Do I need to go to the doctor? I'm really not very sexually experienced at all so I have no idea what's normal and what isn't. Can anyone help?

    VirginAngel [sign in to see picture]
    • Rank: General
    • Posts: 924
    • Joined: 1 Mar 2014

    Hi there, firstly, you're not abnormal at all, so try not to panic. Seeing a doctor certainly wouldn't do any harm, but i appreciate it may be embarrassing. It sounds like you're very tense and expecting it to hurt, which honestly can make you tense up and make insertion painful. Lube is a great idea, but you also need to relax. I understand how you feel, im 25, a virgin, new to masturbation and also stick to mainly clitoral and never used a tampon in my life. I can't get anywhere with anything jelly like, but found insertion is much, much easier with glass, because it's practically frictionless. I'm about to try to move on to a small silicone dildo hopefully, but unlike you i don't experience pain it just doesn't go in at all. It is possible you still have your hymen which can cause pain and bleeding when it stretches or breaks, which could also explain the bleeding. There is a possibility that it could be something medical, but it is more likely to be psychological. Try relaxing as much as possible, maybe some soothing music, a hot bath, however you relax best, then try slowly. Try not to expect it to hurt, instead take it slow and see what happens. If you don't get anywhere a trip to the doctors may be in need, but they've seen and heard it all before, so try not to worry.

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