• a virgin question.

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    blackcat1492 [sign in to see picture]
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    hey, so yes im posting again! but im having a mini anxiety attack over this, and have no one else to turn too, and everyone on here is so nice!

    so the toys i ordered arrived today, i was very excited and so of course wanted to try them. i started by trying the love honey basics slim smoothie vibe, but when i tried to get it inside me it hurt way too much.

    so i went for the butt plug i had bought to use as it was small, its the lovehoney basics purple one, i lubed it up and it hurt but i got it in! touching other areas, i managed to orgasm, it didnt happen easily like normally though.

    when i removed it there was a little blood on it but i didnt think anything of it until i went to clean myself up and there was alot more blood! its hard to explain but it was like a heavyish period, along with clots (TMI sorry!)

    see, i thought i had broken my hymen a few years ago when i tried a toy once. i know breaking your hymen isnt a big deal, but my head isnt listening.

    when i thought i had a few years ago it put me off trying inside toys again until now, when i found lovehoney.

    todays blood could be my hymen or it could be my period (i have PCOS, i havent had a period in a year, but my body likes to annoy me) but its 2 hours later and ive stopped bleeding.

    the thing is, for whatever reason im worried that ive broken my hymen, i know its stupid because it means nothing, im still a virgin and i always will be until i have sex, however i feel like...i dont know.

    also, that small little butt plug bloody hurt! that also worries me, i dont want sex to be something painful always, making me think i should carry on with trying toys, another part doesnt because...god i dont know.

    can someone give me peace of mind? as any women struggled like this? anything! my brain is going 100 miles an hour, (i do suffer with anxiety if you hadnt guessed)

    thankyou for listening to my ramble

    x

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    sassykitten;) [sign in to see picture]
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    Hey i think the important thing is dont panic... your only make things worse..

    Im no expert but sounds to me like youve broken your hymen, I do advise if bleeding continues or your in pain go see a doctor however you got to talk small amounts of discomfort into consideration that your bodys not used to it.. I bled quite a but when I first had sex and actually did when I had sex wuth my last partner for the first couple of times ..

    Just remember lube lube lube...

    I cant comment on anal as im not experienced .. as I said im not expert so wait out for other replys n doctors if your really worried xx

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    Purring-Pussy [sign in to see picture]
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    Perhaps ypu wasn't quite relaxed enough, or didn't quite get the toys in at the right angle. I remember when I first tried using tampons, that it was uncomfortable, but with practice I managed to get it in the right angle and it was comfortable.

    It does sound like your hymen has broken. I lost some blood when I broke mine, but it was during my first intercourse, I didn't start using toys until a few years later.

    I think a little more gentlepractice and you'll be fine.

    Good luck x

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    Young and fun95 [sign in to see picture]
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    had you done anything before trying to insert a toy? you need to warm p before inserting anything or it really does hurt. did you also use plenty of lube. the bleeding is most likely just a tear or like a graze from no lube or warm up, although it worries me tha there were clots, that sounds more like a period to me

    your hymen is not a sign of virginity and tbh you'll feel a lot better losing your virginity without it, i lost mine when i had an accident when i was about 5 sex was boring becuase of my crap ex but it didnt hurt in the slightest and i didnt bleed.

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    Lovebirds_x [sign in to see picture]
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    I broke my hymen as a child through horse riding. These things happen!

    As for the butt plug hurting you...that could be because you were already (conciously or subconciously) tensed up after the other toy hurt. All the lube in the world won't help if you're bracing for pain!

    With regards to the bleeding, you can bleed after orgasm if you are near a period. The contractions just force out what is in there. It's a possibility! It's also possible you bumped your cervix and irritated it...ah, there are lots of things it could have been. Just throwing ideas out there! It could just be your pcos causing weird bleeding too, especially if you have a bigger cyst atm.

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    blackcat1492 [sign in to see picture]
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    thankyou guys, i was warmed up, but maybe not enough! and i did use lube, i do think it was my hymen, im just annoyed with myself that im worrying over it.

    x

    1421352454
    JM88 [sign in to see picture]
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    Can you break your hymen without noticing then? Ive never noticed anything like anyone else has explained

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    blackcat1492 [sign in to see picture]
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    yeah you can do, depends on you hymen as everyone is different, but if your a active child then chances are you can, horse riding or bike riding is well known for doing it.

    x

    1421354008
    fairehlights [sign in to see picture]
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    Breaking your hymen is a bullsh!t myth to do with the purity of virginity yadda yadda. It's not a solid sheet and most of the time it just stretches and slides out of the way without bleeding, then sort of stays there.
    Some people's rips or tear, and some people do carelessly shove toys straight through it (ouch?! D: ).

    In regards to your dilemma, with your PCOS do you find you get a lot of spotting or brown-ish discharge a fair bit of the time, but no real period?
    If so, you may well have knocked your cervix or otherwise stimulated it's opening, triggering a period, pretty much. It's grim, but it happens, and it's nothing to worry about.

    For future ref, as has been said, much lube! It's a godsend, really. Warm up first with fingers, especially for anal, and don't try and get a toy in all at once- if it takes an hour to fully insert a plug, so be it. It should never hurt, and once you're practiced and relaxed, it won't.

    Go slow, go steady, and you should be fine :)

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    alienpenguin [sign in to see picture]
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    It can be hard to tell when I first had sex I bled for three days not heavily but here and there, it didn't hurt and I just put a pad in. If the blood if brownish its more likely to be from your hymen than if its redish. Also if its spotting its more likely to be your hymen.

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    fairehlights [sign in to see picture]
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    alienpenguin wrote:

    It can be hard to tell when I first had sex I bled for three days not heavily but here and there, it didn't hurt and I just put a pad in. If the blood if brownish its more likely to be from your hymen than if its redish. Also if its spotting its more likely to be your hymen.

    Nope.
    Fresh blood is red, blood that has been sat or mixed with tissue or other fluids is brown to black.
    Blood from breaking of the hymen will be a tiny bit, and bright red. It may also appear pink if it's mixed with lube and bodily fluids.

    It's p important to know where blood is coming from when you're just starting to experiment with sex and masturbation type things, as it's very handy in identifying what happened.
    Generally, the redder it is, the fresher it is, and the closer to the surface of your body it's coming from.

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    VirginAngel [sign in to see picture]
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    I am a virgin, never masturbated til march of last year, had never used a tampon etc yet have no idea when my hymen broke, never had any pain or bleeding in my life that hasnt been a period. I don't get pain with toys, never did, they just don't "fit" so won't go in. I've never felt any kind of pain actually, just sensations i either like or dislike. Maybe you've just jumped in too soon with too big of a toy?

    1421355947
    blackcat1492 [sign in to see picture]
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    The blood was fresh, not period like the reason I thought maybe it was because there was clots. I'm thinking it was my hymen, but I've calmed down a bit now :) I have tried tampons but I had no luck with them at all! I'm gonna try again and not let myself be put off, I'm a virgin even without my bleeding hymen, and if a man didn't like that he doesn't deserve my virginity :)

    1421357939
    fairehlights [sign in to see picture]
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    blackcat1492 wrote:

    The blood was fresh, not period like the reason I thought maybe it was because there was clots. I'm thinking it was my hymen, but I've calmed down a bit now :) I have tried tampons but I had no luck with them at all! I'm gonna try again and not let myself be put off, I'm a virgin even without my bleeding hymen, and if a man didn't like that he doesn't deserve my virginity :)

    Sounds like you bashed your cervix.
    Part of PCOS is that your cervix can get ''craggy'', and is uneven, thickened and a bit...cracked, as the quack puts it, and is very prone to bleeding and if hit, bits falling off, as gross as that sounds. It can be made worse by being on the pill too, if you are using one?
    That'll account for the clotting, and why the blood was fresh.
    It's nothing to worry about really, just be careful.

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    Lovebirds_x [sign in to see picture]
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    fairehlights wrote:

    blackcat1492 wrote:

    The blood was fresh, not period like the reason I thought maybe it was because there was clots. I'm thinking it was my hymen, but I've calmed down a bit now :) I have tried tampons but I had no luck with them at all! I'm gonna try again and not let myself be put off, I'm a virgin even without my bleeding hymen, and if a man didn't like that he doesn't deserve my virginity :)

    Sounds like you bashed your cervix.
    Part of PCOS is that your cervix can get ''craggy'', and is uneven, thickened and a bit...cracked, as the quack puts it, and is very prone to bleeding and if hit, bits falling off, as gross as that sounds. It can be made worse by being on the pill too, if you are using one?
    That'll account for the clotting, and why the blood was fresh.
    It's nothing to worry about really, just be careful.

    +1. Sounds like way too much blood for hymen.

    1421359249
    blackcat1492 [sign in to see picture]
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    Thanks girls it does sound like my cervix, surprised I didn't know I had! I may mention it to my doctor if I get brave, but thankyou for puttingy mind at ease :)

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    Nexus710 [sign in to see picture]
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    A trip to the doctor sounds like a good idea, even if it is just to put your mind at rest, as for worry over braking your hymen, being active can break this anyway. There are women who aren't born with a hymen in the first place, cant remember the %.

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    B-B [sign in to see picture]
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    I recommend starting with external stimulation. Play with you nipples and clit, maybe have fun with a shower head... Get yourself very turned on and wet before you insert something. Keep in mine you are using muscles you haven't used before. They need to be stretched and warmed up just like any muscle before exercise!

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    fantasia fairy [sign in to see picture]
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    I broke my hymen when i first lost my virginity and i bled alot too. Sometimes that happens. I know a friend that didnt bleed at all but i also know people that did bleed alot. I think the harder thing with doing it on your own is that you need to make sure you a really turned on first. I would advise sticking to clit stimulation and buy the same toy i used for my first one (see my profile reviews) its a slim first time vibrator. Also use the toy with a condom and with alot of lube...

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    [suspended user]

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    Not sure if I've never had a hymen or when I broke mine it never bleed. But I've never had any bleeding that wasn't from my Period.

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