• New things to try or use with a new partner? Help!!!

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    Clara83 [sign in to see picture]
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    I'm needing some advice folks. I have started seeing someone new and would like any tips etc on what we can do in and out of the bedroom to spice up things?

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    Sum Sub [sign in to see picture]
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    Jalapeños are good for added spice.

    1412199627
    CaptiveMistress [sign in to see picture]
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    Ways to spice things up seems to me to be dependent on what your current habits are. Dildos and virators are 'usually' a safe starting point, but even those simple things are not for everyone. Personally, I can't imagine life without those, at the very least!

    1412199788
    Clara83 [sign in to see picture]
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    Lol sum sub 😉
    Thanks just never know what to do or that. I love my toys too but don't want him thinking omg look at all her toys sort of way!!

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    Strange Days [sign in to see picture]
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    More likely - OMG she has TOYS....!!! IMO anyway.....

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    Miss Stripes [sign in to see picture]
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    I'd definitely say introduce something small first, don't bring in the full 'toy box' straight away ;)

    Maybe blindfold, and play with feather ticklers etc, then introduce things like vibrator etc if he enjoyed the others.

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    MrsMcX [sign in to see picture]
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    Have you discussed using toys at all? I would say before introducing anything have a discussion it and see if he would be up for it too. Then if he is, I would maybe just start with a cock ring, or maybe if you want to try a variety of things then go for one of the Lovehoney starter packs.

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    Lovebirds_x [sign in to see picture]
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    Since you're seeing someone new, I don't see why there should be a need to 'spice things up' involving toys? Surely you're still in the throes of getting well and truly aquainted with each other! But seriously, I'd be wary of jumping straight into using lots of toys together. Could give your partner the feeling of not being enough for you. A good talk with him should help you see where you stand, just don't put pressure on him or make him feel like he has to use the toys. After all, they can be your helpers when he isn't around then live in their boxes while you get to know him better.

    Of course, it could go the complete other way and he could be a mega kinkster with a huge collection of his own. Has to be worth a conversation outside the bedroom to find out!

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    YummyMummy1994 [sign in to see picture]
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    Why not start with simple sex games and/or sex dice? Just to get to know each other and open up a bit, monogamy is by far the best one on the market in my opinion. It will get you two to get to know each other better along with what you enjoy 'kinkness' wise :)

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    Ame [sign in to see picture]
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    Sum Sub wrote:

    Jalapeños are good for added spice.

    I gave a good laugh!

    OP, I would suggest some innocent spanking. Nothing better than starting with some light slaps and get frisky and friskier!

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    Clara83 [sign in to see picture]
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    thank you all for your advice

    If im honest its not the first time we have slept together but is in a dating way if that makes sense lol

    i think i have a lot of ideas now

    1412267023
    S&A-Forever! [sign in to see picture]
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    Ame wrote:

    Sum Sub wrote:

    Jalapeños are good for added spice.

    I gave a good laugh!

    OP, I would suggest some innocent spanking. Nothing better than starting with some light slaps

    Yep - agreed! That certainly turns things up a notch!

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    KinkyFuckery [sign in to see picture]
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    When I started dating my fella , he knew I had toys but didnt show he any for a few weeks but what i then did was send him home with a gift bag and a guide to each toy and what I like now I only seleceted a few and the less scary ones & I let him plan a naughty night in his choice his rules and what he wanted to do with whatever toy he wanted, we had a fabulous night & now he will quiet happly put his hand in the toy box and is happy and confident to use my toys which have become our toys

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    Clara83 [sign in to see picture]
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    KinkyFuckery wrote:

    When I started dating my fella , he knew I had toys but didnt show he any for a few weeks but what i then did was send him home with a gift bag and a guide to each toy and what I like now I only seleceted a few and the less scary ones & I let him plan a naughty night in his choice his rules and what he wanted to do with whatever toy he wanted, we had a fabulous night & now he will quiet happly put his hand in the toy box and is happy and confident to use my toys which have become our toys

    I might have to try this kinkyfuckery

    1412416321
    El terriblo [sign in to see picture]
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    Well the thing is if he knows about your toys( because if it's going to be a long term thing he eventually will find out right?) then surely rather than going "omg wtf is that" if he is open minded then it's allgood, however if he isn't then it's down to you what you do really, although using toys on a partner is very intimate and you feel a similar connection to that of normal love making, so really it's down to two things:

    1. How he finds out about them (be it you tell him about them or he finds them by accident)

    2. How he reacts to them and how you present them or talk about them

    Either way the spicing things up really depends on what you two are willing to try and do really, so for instance everyone loves a massge right? why not treat him or get him to treat you ? Why not try different lubricants and toys such as blind folding him and getting him to guess what you are doing? the possibilities are endless, again its down to what you two feel comfortable with really

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    magicnumber69 [sign in to see picture]
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    Cyklon wrote:

    More likely - OMG she has TOYS....!!! IMO anyway.....

    +1 I love that my gf has toys and although we're long-distance atm, I can't wait to get with her and enjoy her enjoying her toys. The question I have though, is why do you feel the need to 'spice things up' so soon? Of course, it depends on your definition, but just exploring one another, being intimate and passionate is just as exciting and pleasurable.
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    KinkyFuckery [sign in to see picture]
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    Clara83 wrote:

    KinkyFuckery wrote:

    When I started dating my fella , he knew I had toys but didnt show he any for a few weeks but what i then did was send him home with a gift bag and a guide to each toy and what I like now I only seleceted a few and the less scary ones & I let him plan a naughty night in his choice his rules and what he wanted to do with whatever toy he wanted, we had a fabulous night & now he will quiet happly put his hand in the toy box and is happy and confident to use my toys which have become our toys

    I might have to try this kinkyfuckery

    It really worked for us it opened him up a little to the world of toys, I think I pt about 5 toys in with detail description he really did love it just to have an insight to the chest of toys to have snap shot of what was in there. We had an amazing night and for our first christmas he brought me a glass toy because he knew what I liked x

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